Try not to speak out to much to your mother about all the things you learn about how the JW cult is false . She will consider you controlled by the Devil. One thing to say is use the example of Jesus he was not baptized until age 30 . I'm a 3rd generation JW I am inactive and can't speakout to any family or I will be shunned worse than I 'm already . I took until my 50s to do the research that easily proved the JWs are a false pseudo religion . Jwfacts.com helped alot . Keep coming back and asking questions. Also use the search function on this site there are over 4 million posts of great info .
I CAN'T TAK
by Caupon 46 Replies latest jw friends
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Oubliette
caupon: But recently I have thought about everything myself and realized how the organization is just plain wrong on a number of things.
Yes they are!
Good for you for having the personal integrity to think this out for yourself. On the other hand, you must know that the absolute worst crime in JW-land is independent thinking. They can and will forgive everything else, but that is the unforgivable sin.
Cofty gave you a lot of good advice and made some excellent suggestions. I'd just add this, reailze that your mother is in a highly authoritarian, mind-control cult. She has been indoctrinated to be terrifited of what will happen if her son doesn't "serve Jehovah" (READ: become a baptized, JW).
Since she has not logical, rational way to persuade you that thinking for yourself is wrong, she does what she has been trained by the cult to do: she tries to manipulate you emotionally with fear and guilt.
I would suggest you get yourself a copy of Steven Hassan's book, Releasing the Bonds: Empowering People to Think for Themselves, and read it. It will do you a lot of good and might even help you to learn how to reach your mother!
In the meantime, welcome to the forum and keep posting!
Oubliette
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flipper
Hi CAUPON , nice to have you here. I'm so sorry that your mom is treating you this way in a hateful and disrespectful way. Your mom is sick and mentally controlled by a manipulative high control organization the WT Society and if she had full control of her own authentic human mind- she would not treat you this way. I know it doesn't stop the hurt, but realizing that your mom is being dominated to feel the way she does lets you understand that SHE in turn is being controlled in her mind from WT leaders. It's a mind control organization which dominates it's 7 million members. Good for you that you didn't get baptized in order to remain free and have your freedom of movement and mind. Please do research on the book Oubilette mentioned as Hassan's books really helped me as well when I exited the Witnesses. We are here as a support to you my friend . Things will get better for you in time. Please hang in there, help is on the way. People here understand
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breakfast of champions
CAUPON - welcome, and good for you! You're way ahead of the game.
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EndofMysteries
If you are under 18 or not in a position to live out on your own, maybe without getting baptized just be low key until you get out and get your life established.
If you were raised a JW, and all of your friends, etc, are active JW's, it might be tough for awhile.
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Gypsy Sam
Welcome, my teen daughter started expressing doubts late last year. At first, I was very upset and tried to make her do more in "the truth". Then, I thought I would just step up my efforts, possibly pioneer and then she would see how the JW way was best way of life, by my example. I figured I'd reexamine my own faith and try to reprove it to myself. About this time news of the Candace Conti case came my way. I decided that before I tried to squeeze pioneering into an already completely full schedule, I'd better keep reading. Truth can stand up to scrutiny and I rationalized I'd just refute anything false I found online, or so I thought. We have since totally faded. Our last meeting was the Memorial.
Hopefully, your staying respectful but asking questions will get your mom to think...
Wish you the best and I agree with the tips Cofty gave you.
Carpe Diem!
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RagingBull
Hope you're building a network of good, solid, WORDLY friends...they know what TRUE Friendship is. JWs find you're not one of them, they'll act as if you're invisible. you know that.
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LoisLane looking for Superman
Hi there Caupon... Welcome.
It is not a happy time to feel rejected. (((Hugs of concern and understanding)))
LoisLane
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ABibleStudent
Welcome Caupon, I'm sorry that your mother's cult persona is being sooo uncaring to you because you made a very intelligent choice not to serve a dangerous cult that uses BITE control techniques to victimizes JWs.
You will understand a lot more by reading Steve Hassan's books (i.e., "Combatting Cult Mind Control", "Releasing the Bonds: Empowering People to Think for Themselves", and (his latest book) "Freedom of Mind: Helping Loved Ones Leave Controlling People, Cults and Beliefs"), visiting his website www.freedomofmind.com, and watching videos on his website. If you don't have money to purchase Steve Hassan's books at least watch the following videos or checkout the books from a library near you: (2003) Steve Hassan explains SIA method to rescue a loved ones from unhealthy situations, NY Ethical Culture Society February 2013 (41:09), NY Ethical Culture Society 2010 (40:56).
The most important things that you can do are to make your plan(s) for what you want to accomplish in your life, do not allow your mother to pressure you to become baptised unless you are convinced that it is right for you, post on JWN to vent your frustrations about your mother and to help you to execute your plan, and to research the WTBTS as much as possible. Have you visited www.jwfacts.com, www.jwsurvey.org, www.freeminds2.org, www.watchtowerdocuments.com, and www.freedomofmind.com?
You are young and have the rest of your life to enjoy, even if for the next several years it will be very difficult for you because your mother's cult persona will try anything to pressure you to get baptised. Just remember that your mother has to persona's - her cult persona and her authentic persona who you love.
Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,
Robert
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jgnat
Welcome, caupon. I have a soft spot for young adults. I want you to succeed, prosper, and be surrounded by people who who love and respect you. Could you calm your mom down by saying you are simply deferring baptism? Perhaps use Jesus as an example. You might also challenge her if she is more concerned about her reputation with her friends at the congregation than your best interest?
