An Elder Reads CoC !! (page 9)

DJS

Welcome!! CoC definitely helped me along the path. I remember feeling, rather than a sick feeling, simply a feeling of relief and a big smile came over my face when I realized I wasn't so smart! I had been deceived all of my life when I thought I was a pretty bright guy!!

James Jackson

I read it too!

I reccomend you listen to Ed Dunlap's (He served many years in Bethel and was an Gilead Instructor, no dummy) interview.

cappytan

Man. I love your story.

My Dad's an elder, and since I've woken up, I can't help but daydream that he really has woken up to TTATT, but is like you and is just staying in for the time being.

It's just a fanciful dream, not based on reality, but hey. I'm a JW. I'm used to fanciful dreams not based on reality.

TTATTelder

Thanks cappytan...

Hope you get your wish with your Dad. You never know what people are thinking in this org. You are only allowed to say positive things. It honestly gets increasingly absurd as time passes and things sink in more and more for me. The knee jerk indoctrination "comebacks" aren't even popping up in my head much anymore. When I wrote that intro post it was still like I had two personalities battling each other. The awake one was winning but the indoctrination was still holding some ground. What a process.

-TE

kairos

Excellent story and replies.

FayeDunaway

TTattelder, I'm a complete newbie here and just have to know how this last year has been for you! Are you still an elder? Are you making progress with your wife?? Am so hoping you are well on your way to freedom.

FayeDunaway

BTW, my screen name is more like FadeDoneAway :)

TTATTelder

Faye,

I am still an elder. I am on a body that is understaffed at the moment. I am trying to back away with good timing. We will have to see how things play out going forward. I have marital, extended family, and employment concerns to weigh out. The marital factor is by far the biggest. I actually am very determined to beat the WT at its own game with her.

The wife is seeing things very slowly but there is progress. She is missing a few meetings and service here and there. I think it is getting easier to make an excuse and skip. Her zeal is down and she even has acknowledged it. She blames the lame congregation though instead of the lame religion.

I slip in little daggers from time to time but have to be careful. The cult personality can kick in like the freakin exorcist. Seriously her eyes change. She looks at me like I am a demon if I step past that imaginary line.

It's really sick the hold the WT has on people. What a diabolical raping of human lives. They should be locked up - and don't let them back out this time!

Anyway I am playing it slow, patient, and determined. It gets old as hell sometimes though, I have to say. FS is the worst. I'm thankful for breaks and "windshield time".

Welcome to the forum.

-TE

FayeDunaway

Thanks TE!! I also asked you a few questions in another post of yours, if you have time.

I agree with the other advice others have given you, don't be pushy, just point out things occasionally. The worst part of this org is that it tears families apart. So hard to be patient tho!! I know, I almost went crazy!! Field service, ugh!! What I did was try to learn from householders during service, lol. It actually directed me to the religion I'm in now. You may not want a new religion, but use this time to keep your eyes and ears open to things around you. Not sure you still believe in God, but I fully believe he helped direct me where I needed to go for myself, just by things I came across on the way out.

FayeDunaway

Shoot te, I was confusing you a bit with fremind fade, I asked him those questions! Sorry about that. Just getting used to it here.

An Elder Reads CoC !!

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