marrying younger spouses

by ssn587 63 Replies latest jw friends

  • mrsjones5
    mrsjones5

    If you love and respect each other I don't see why it would be anyone's business what the age difference is.

  • blondie
    blondie

    I'm older than my husband by a few years. His music tastes were different from mine because I had been raised a jw. He has expanded my views on music. People I work with think I'm in my second childhood but I am just catching up on all the good music from the 60's to now.

  • Quarterback
    Quarterback

    Well, it's true, we can't judge, and there is that love and respect that you have working for each other. Keep working out...it's keeping you young.

  • BluesBrother
    BluesBrother

    If you are happy and your wife and family are happy, then you certainly do not need our endorsement.....Go with it and be thankfull whatever anybody else might think

  • Jomavrick
    Jomavrick

    Go with God I say, age isnt a major concern, unless it affects being able to give a growing child the kind of fatherly attention needed.

    I know someone that is 80 that has a son who is 14 - he has never played catch, sports with him ever. That kind of drives me crazy,,,,,

  • moshe
    moshe
    he has never played catch, sports with him ever

    My father was a farmer- he never played catch sports with me , either- he handed me a pitchfork to clean out the barn, instead.

  • rocketman
    rocketman

    Funny, I know several really nice women who are markedly younger than me, and I too hit the gym and stay in good shape for a guy my age.

    And yet, I'd just feel funny dating someone who was young enough to be my daughter.

    However, that feeling is strictly personal, and I'm not saying it's off-putting or wrong for anyone else. It just feels odd to me.

    Also, for me, the age of children she may have would be a factor. Several of the women I alluded to above have kids who are quite young. I wouldn't want to go back to that. I feel like I did all that and that I really don't want to raise kids anymore.

    But again, that's personal, and I think it's fine if an older spouse wants to take on the responsibility of younger kids again.

  • wha happened?
    wha happened?

    I've been on both ends of the scale. My wife is 15 years younger than me. Before I met her, I was in a serious relationship with a woman 9 years older than me. It worked for me, so if it works for u, go for it

  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    I currently would not consider marrying someone 20 years younger than me because I feel that such younger people are vastly different in the way they think and the things that are important in their life. Most importantly, I feel that people don't really take an actual "spiritual journey" until they pass a threshold in their life. Even if a "late 20's" lady were to be an atheist like me, I would think they might have some life changing thoughts yet. They might want to get out to clubs and go do adventurous things that young people do, while I would want to do things that are more tame. Music tastes would be totally different and YADDA YADDA YADDA.

    But that's me. I also don't think all those things are all that important to other people. If the initial reason such an age difference was okay to you, and all other things are secondary, that's great for you.

  • Band on the Run
    Band on the Run

    Your current age has a large bearing on the issue. Ten years is a marked difference at 18. The difference between 50 and 60 is not so much. There are issues concerning power. No one has answered my question why tons of women are not marrying younger. What do you even talk about with someone so much younger. I find a ten year difference in nonromantic same sex relationships can be a hindrance. There are political and feminist takes on this.

    If you are the exception to the rule, my opinion should not matter. I repeat, though, how do you have sex with someone younger than your daughters. It may not be technical incest but it is so damn close.

    What is wrong with the woman that she did not marry someone of her own generation? It smacks of dependency and marrying for security to me.

    It is similar to interracial dating. Many American servicemen returned with Japanese war brides. Americans were not nice to the women. A study found that the men sought them as treasures b/c of stereotypes concerning what Asian women will put up with - almost anything. They would not talk back-supposedly. Men believed they would humbly submit and never cheat --supposedly. The funny thing is that the norm for such behavior would never marry outside Japanese culture. The women dating American men were the exceptions to the rule. They were bold for their culture. The divorce rate was astronomical. Part of it may have been due to bad feelings towards the women by American women. Fundamentally, they assumed the opposite of what was true. The women looked for men who were powerful, rich, and social. Such men would likely marry Americans. It is cultural and very sad.

    I only know what I think and others say very out loud when such a couple makes their presence known. Woody Allen was my favorite director. I would stand in line for six or seven hours to see a film on the first night. Since he poached his "daughter," I refuse to see any Woody Allen film. Old men prey on young women. Sometimes they get what is coming to them.

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