Another sad non jw falling for a baptised jw girl story

by spirituk 53 Replies latest social relationships

  • spirituk

    ok ,so this is my story , this jw girl came on vacation in my country as a friend of my girl-cousin who is not a jw but were classmates at uni . my cousin introduced her to me but she didnt tell me that she was a jw from the very first moment we flirt each other.we went on beach ,on bars ,cafes etc and she acted so wordly ,in fact i thought she could be a good one night stand with her behaviour .never saw anything weird about her that could lead me to question something, with the peak in the club where we danced together while hugging very passionatly . i tried to kiss her that night but she kept her distance , i didnt notice any bad on that.anyway, next day we flirt again at the the beach and at night too . we had a small kiss at the airport where she was crying finding excuses that we could not be together because of the distance and other false reasons ..anyways i kept fighting for her with constant msgs and calls and then we kept a contact from facebook and skype , in the meanwhile my cousin told me that this girl was a jw and therefore i should end it because there wasnt any future.of course i didnt see any reason to end it because i was ignorant of this cult. the jw girl was still flirting with me from chat but she was always keep telling me that she was forbidden to me and that she couldnt enjoy me and staff like that , i was able to calm her down . we were talking over the fb for about 4 months and i got tickets to visit her without asking her . in the meanwhile she was telling me that she wanted to get invincible and that her family put pressure on her at home. when she found about the tickets she went mad and crazy , she then revealed me about her religion that she was a jw and i told her that i knew about it , she agreed for me to go and see her and i was going to stay in a hotel . when i went there the first day she entered the hotel room and she huged me .we talked a little and we went off for theatre.there ,it was her big brother who faded form jws.He questioned me deeply and told me that even for pamela andersson he wouldnt come to another country to see a girl,and that in front of his sister.on the way home he was full of irony for me in front of her and she would say nothing about that.after that we went to the hotel where she told me that she felt like s**t about it. we spent most of the days in the hotel room , laying in bed ,hugging , and kissing ,she wouldnt let me kiss her on lips .one day she told me that before many years she had a relationship with another non jw who loved so much but she left him one morning because she couldnt stand the guilts.,for the record, she baptised at 16 ,she studied at uni ,and got engaged at 21 with a 31 year old jw where he ended it after 2 years of courtship where he mistreated her ,no sex though.. anyways,she was afraid of people seeing us together thats why we didnt go night we would go out at bars outside the city with her non jw girl friend of hers. all the time that we were together she was sooo tender and loving with me that made me think that i was on a good path ,on the last night she kissed me in the car of her friend on the way home,we were kissing for at least 20 minutes on a french kiss. then i went at the hotel and she text me 10 minutes after that she shouldnt kiss me .. the final day in the morning she came in my room one hour before i was going to head to the airport,,i was going to tell her to be together but as soon as she entered the room she told me that we had to talk. suprisingly then she told me that i wasnt the person she thought i was from the facebook, and that my behaviour was different and that she couldnt imagine me as the man of her life,for ever .she told me that the night in the club before three months i was looking very serious and that attracted her , she told me to lead to a different level our relationship..i was shocked ,i thought we were going to be together..and she told me those things..after i came back to my country she told me that she told me those things because i wouldnt understand when she told me about her religion because i told her we could find a solution.. i fought it for a few weeks more but all she was saying was that she cared about me but she didn t want to be with me etc..she told me that she couldnt stand the pressure and the guilts were like cancer to her .. she still says she cares about me , she blocked me on fb and told me that it is for my best but i wouldnt understand it.. i care so much for her and i want her and i love her .. please give me something except for ''run'' and etc .. Thank you, a broken heart

  • Theocratic Sedition
    Theocratic Sedition

    welcome to the forum. Tried to edit your post into paragraphs, oh well. Welcome to the forum.

  • tornapart

    Poor guy!! Another one! These jw girls seem to just want to play games. Get a guy to fall in love with her, get the guilt trips then dump him.

    I would say run away if you can but you've asked us not to say that. So alternatives? Her brother is a faded JW, means he doesn't want it anymore and is cool with you. Could you get in touch with him, get him on side? Maybe he could help you?

  • out4good3

    i care so much for her and i want her and i love her .. please give me something except for ''run'' and etc ..

  • Satanus

    You poor guy. It is hard for a nonjw to understand. The religion is like monkey riding around on her back. Getting it off of her is a huge task that could take yrs. It really is better for you to cut it off here and not waste your precious time. You can read about it here, on some other threads where people went through the same thing.


  • Gayle

    I think with her "split personality" between herself and jw self, it will be impossible,,all the more so with the long distance issue. You invested a trip for this 'play' on her part. Please don't invest anymore for this horrible journey.

    By the way, it is not just the JW girls that play this; the JW guys are doing it too.

  • ruderedhead

    That young lady sounds confused. She isn't sure if she wants to be in that religion or not, and she is stringing you along while she figures it out. She blocked you on fb, follow her lead for now and stop contacting her. She is probably sincere in saying it is for your own good. Until she figures things out, it is best for you to move on unless you want your heart broken more than it is now. She knows how to contact you if she wants to later on.

  • jgnat

    You realize your behavior borders on stalking, right? What does it mean when a girl says "no"?

  • moshe

    What is unattainable seems to be so much more valuable. At least she didn't ask for money or run off with an expensive engagement ring- count yourself lucky.

  • NeonMadman

    I want you to tell me what the correct answer to 2 + 2 is. Oh, but please give me something besides "4."

    This is a girl who started out not being honest and up front with you. She didn't tell you she was a JW, and made up phony reasons why you couldn't be together instead of simply telling you the truth. She waffles back and forth, now she wants you, now she doesn't. She has told you flat out that you have no future with her.

    You asked us to give you something besides, "run," but I'm sorry - that is the correct answer. Even if the JW issue could be overcome (and trust me, it can't, unless she is having doubts about the organization), it doesn't sound like you would have a good relationship. The situation you have described is one of lies and duplicity - no way to start a relationship. There are tons of eligible women out there. Find one who will be honest with you.

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