Elders finally took me to the back room...

by OneDayillBeFree 59 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Glander
    Glander

    They were on a "fishing and hunting" trip.

    A rule I live by - If someone asks you a personal question that is none of their business you have no obligation to tell them the truth.

    A possible motive - Are they short of MS material in your cong? Maybe they are just trying to round up a new recruit. I have heard here that the Elders are thinning out and MS are looked upon as replacements.

  • Yan Bibiyan
    Yan Bibiyan

    Umm, how do I say this nicely....ummm....f*#k them!

    Great idea with the app....what are the chances some college kid developed this one. That's why they hate higher education

  • jookbeard
    jookbeard

    it's true probably most of us would have "meekly" succumbed to their request to meet and done the whole" let them hear want they want to hear," bit like getting pulled over by the cops and realizing how futile it is arguing but it's clear many are not standing for their crap and seeking advice on forums like this which never existed 20 odd years ago.

  • TheListener
    TheListener

    If you're fading and want to keep it that way I suggest being as nice as pie and letting them know how much stress you are under at work and that it can tend to make you depressed. But, that you are doing the best you can and really appreciate the love of the congregation and that you always feel better after a meeting.

    Fading means playing a game in which they make all the rules. It's like survivor but instead of prize money it's the relationship with our families that we win. Kinda sucks really.

    Of course we don't want to follow their rules and give them power but by fading we sort of sign up for that.

    Fading takes time and patience. I wish you the best of luck.

  • Open mind
    Open mind

    There is one exception to the "just say no to the back room" advice given here. If they claim to have received information that you have been involved in "gross or serious sin" then if you refuse to meet with them, they can DF you in absentia. But chances are they would at least tip their hand a little bit if they were pulling you in for something judicial. Just to make sure, you could say something like, "No, I'm fine right now. Thanks. No one's accusing me of "gross sin" or anything are they?"

    If you ask them straight up, they'll have to admit one way or the other if they're trying to hang you with a Judicial Committee. Short of "gross sins", you can politely decline and you're pretty much untouchable. But don't cop TOO much of an attitude or they could play the "Loose Conduct" card on you. (Blatant and shocking disrespect for Theocratic Order or words to that effect.)

    Best of luck with your education, career and fade!

    om

  • wallsofjericho
    wallsofjericho
    I opened up an app that makes it look as if someone is calling you and set it for 5 minutes... And just before they could ask any further, it went off and I kindly but firmly asked to be excused.

    LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!! GENIUS!!!!!!!

  • wallsofjericho
    wallsofjericho

    they are for sure going to nab you again. You certainly did not give them the meek little sheep scared of the sheperd feeling they were looking for.

    You definitely triggered their spidey-senses. Get ready for more

  • punkofnice
    punkofnice

    Attend a different kingdumb hell if you MUST go to the 'meetings'(TM). Or just don't go at all you can say it's owing to uncontrollable explosive flatus!

  • LostGeneration
    LostGeneration

    Nice planning to get yourself outta there...

    Agree with the others, next time set a firmer boundry and don't go with them back there. If/when they request you to go back, look at them in the eye and simply ask "Regarding?"

    That will immediately throw them off of their game. They expect everyone to just follow them back there.

    From their answer, you can simply delay or decline without much trouble. Its great that you are in school and have a job, both are excused they can't really overcome.

    Good luck

  • Emery
    Emery

    Had something like this happen a few months ago, right before I got married. You did alot better than I would, I just told them what they wanted to hear, acknowledging my weak spiritual state and saying I will do better...syke! hah.

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