Knowing the Real Truth about the "truth" when you're stuck inside...

by OneDayillBeFree 70 Replies latest jw experiences

  • OnTheWayOut

    If the military is a valid choice for you, I did join the Nayy when I dropped out of high school, I did see the world, I was ready to accept responsibility for myself to pay rent, own a car, work full time, etc. when I got out.

  • yknot

    ooooh forgot about the military ....

    It is a rare man who don't look excellent in a uniform!!!

    In many ways a program that has some structure might help you transition away from the routine of the WTS...

  • Aware!

    Your story is very similar to mine and you even beat me to starting a thread like yours. I'm going to put in bold everything we have in common from your post. BTW, I'm in no way trying to hijack your thread; I just wanted to point out that you're not alone, and unfortunately not the last one until this cult implodes. If it makes you feel better, I know at least two others here besides me who are in a similar situation.

    I know TTATT . . . yet I'm still stuck inside.

    I don't regret learning the real truth about this twisted religion . . . .

    . . . I don't even have my own vehicle, although one has been provided for me, but it is not something I can call my own, because it would be immediately taken if I decided to leave rendering me basically homeless.

    I'm not on my own yet . . . I've been saving and working hard to get independent . . . .

    Living this way isn’t living at all. I'm lying to myself and to others, it's a horrible way to live. The organization makes me feel as if I'm the devil, or really mentally diseased. They make me feel like shit. But the truth is the complete opposite. I don't live what the org calls a double life. I mean I would love to but I simply can't because I don't even have any outside (real) friends to do anything with, nor do I have any JW friends for that matter. I don’t do drugs, drink, smoke, or party. I am not a bad person, so why is there so much damn pain and sadness? I feel like just an empty, worthless waste of life.

    I figured there has to be an end to this, and there will be but I don't know when or how.

    I know for a fact that this is how it would go because my parents would in no way try to help me out at all, they barely do now. And my father (in my case my stepdad) is an elder who's in love with his position of power, authority and with the religion, so much that he would kick me out just to keep it (he would probably use Joshua 24:15).

    You should really consider college. What are your interests? What would you like to major in? If your parents don't do well financially you have a high chance of getting a full-tuition scholarship. If you know your dream career pays well and that you will pass all your classes, consider loans. You don't have to repay them until 6 months after graduation or until you get a job, whichever comes first). Can you go to college out of town? What state do you live in? Are you able to disclose that info here? My calls are monitored so I can't call you, but you can text me all you want. Have you considered a VoIP app if you have an ipod touch, ipad, or android device? I'm not out yet, so I have to be as discreet as possible. Unless I win the lottery or something, I'll have to keep being a hypocrite until I gradutate from college, which I'm fine with now. To make things worse, I was recently appointed MS (even though I've been lurking on apostate websites for some time now, lol) and couldn't refuse because that would raise suspicions. My elder stepdad would've found out and interrogated me for "rejecting the holy spirit". There goes my plan for fading...

    I digress, King Solomon, you're a doctor?? Holy Moly!!! I don't know how you find the time to post here.

  • Aware!

    The Navy sounds like a good idea, it'll help you do better in college. My veteran classmates are very disciplined and get good grades.

  • King Solomon
    King Solomon

    I digress, King Solomon, you're a doctor?? Holy Moly!!! I don't know how you find the time to post here.

    Retired now... Hence the time. ;)

    I didn't think about JWs for decades until a family matter came up, and I needed to look into current JW thinking on an issue... It reminded me of what it was like to be trapped in as a young person, and I thought I could add experience from the other end of someone's life, as a success story that it IS possible but only if you MAKE it happen. :)

  • NewYork44M

    Keep working, it took 10 years for me to get out, but once out - freedom is sweet.

  • Diest

    If I ever get a bit more money I would like to start a group home for JW youths. Get people out of the religion and on with their life. This is one of those sad difficult positions and it makes me happy that so many here want to help.

  • moshe
    If I ever get a bit more money I would like to start a group home for JW youths.

    Admirable- I saw a show once where some ex- Amish did that to help 18 and up year olds learn how to live on the outside--

  • Captain Obvious
    Captain Obvious

    Nice thing about the military is its an automatic DA as well. Then you won't need to write that awkward letter...

  • wannabefree

    My brother went into the Marines as an officer by going through their college program first ... better position, can achieve higher rank, which leads to much better pay at retirement if you make it a career.

    Like I said, my brother went into the Marines this way, I enlisted with the JW's, he retired after 20 years with an awesome package and great job offers ... me, I quit college at the urging of my study conductor because the end was near and joined the JW's, 25 years later I am addicted to this website and trying to figure out how to get my life on track.

    Be glad you woke up when you did, you have your whole life ahead of you, focus on where you want to go, you will be able to make it through these difficult times, it will be worth your while.

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