JW nephew graduation party cancelled... your insight is requested

by Alfred 64 Replies latest jw friends

  • Alfred
    Alfred

    Thanks everyone... @leavingwt... I had time to think about it and you're right... I do need to ask the right questions and I only have one shot to get this right... @skeeter... I am almost certain he is going to college... Haven't confirmed it yet but he has brought up the subject a few times... I'm definitely monitoring this situation and will post something in a few months... Thanks again to all... Looking forward to more comments...

  • Hortensia
    Hortensia

    Don't say anything directly about the issue to him. Just let him know you think he's great and you would be happy to help him if he ever needs it.

  • sinis
    sinis

    You want to know what you can do???? Contact the plane company and change your tickets in for one flight for him to come see you. Perhaps offer him some help by allowing him to live with you, help him go to college, if thats his thing, and be the "father" he doesn't have...

  • Iamallcool
    Iamallcool

    thats a great idea, sinis!

  • flipper
    flipper

    ALFRED- It is awful how your sister and her husband have abused the word " discipline " by taking away even his graduation party ! It is an innappropriate use of dissing his accomplishments academically by taking away the recognition of such as a " punishment ". It's hideous. I used to see JW parents do this kind of back-a$$wards what they call " discipline " ALL the time when I was a Witness. Made me want to get up and spank the parents. Or at least take their " parent card " away. Any parent who crushes the spirit of accomplishment in children- has NO RIGHT to be a parent in my opinion. They should get their damned tubes tied or snipped ! I had an ex-wife who tried treating our 18 yr.old son like this.

    Okay. Now I'll exhale . Whooo . Anything you can say to your almost adult nephew towards encouraging college and him seeking higher education I feel is a REAL priority at the moment. Sounds like his mommie and daddie dearest will try to stunt any educational accomplishments - so as his uncle you nEED to be there for him. He needs unconditional acceptance and love right now. He ain't gonna get it from mind controlled JW parents. Don't say anything that would start a JW argument with his folks but tell your nephew to keep your conversations confidential about education, college, etc. Otherwise his folks might squelch your efforts. Do NOT trust his parents. They sound like they are TOO connected to the JW cult.

    I've developed a close friendship with my inactive 31 yr.old nephew. He said the thing that appealed to him most was unconditional love and acceptance. I feel you need to give that in spades to your dear nephew. Good luck to you friend

  • Band on the Run
    Band on the Run

    This triggered many bad memories. Balancing school life and arbitrary JW life. I was near the top of my class with scholarships to Seven Sisters. My father wanted me to bag groceries so he could watch me. I also had a rape monitoring system. My mom wanted me to go to college but was too afraid. I spoke with the principal about needing to speak to him about sometihing important. I faced going into a foster home, leaving my mom and sibiings when I was the nonviolent one. All my friends were oohed and ahhhed. Their parents ooohed me. I went home to be beaten, face a judge, and cried my very soul to kingdom come. Before I had to repeat this tale to the principal (I wanted to tell him about some enrichment program), my father died in the hospital. We breathed.

    It is a very vulnerable age. Life has given you opportunities to master yet.

  • jamiebowers
    jamiebowers
    You want to know what you can do???? Contact the plane company and change your tickets in for one flight for him to come see you. Perhaps offer him some help by allowing him to live with you, help him go to college, if thats his thing, and be the "father" he doesn't have...

    Sinis, great minds think alike...I was going to post the exact same thing.

    Alfred, once he gets to your house, have a special dinner or party with your friends to honor his accomplishments. Then take him to visit colleges in your area. Emcourage him to be a normal young ault, and you won't have to say a word about the Watchtower. Watch him sprout wings and fly out of jw never never land.

  • ranmac
    ranmac

    Typical JW insanity. Punishing a kid for being a normal and human. Makes me sad

  • VampireDCLXV
    VampireDCLXV

    I'm glad that nothing like that happened to my sister. (She was/is the incurable goody two shoes anyway.) I was already out for two years when her's was held. If someone tried pulling that shit on my sister, that someone would've died!

    V665V665

  • DesirousOfChange
    DesirousOfChange

    ALFRED- It is awful how your sister and her husband have abused the word " discipline " by taking away even his graduation party !

    It might be that his parents did not have much choice in the matter. If the elders plan on "marking" him at the next meeting (for dating a non-witness), then who of their friends would even attend the graduation party? No witness friends. And that's probably the only friends they have. No "bad association" friends.

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