I also understand someone staying in to try and help their spouse or child get out also - who is just as brainwashed as they once were - perhaps even BECAUSE they once were - and guilt is a strong motivator.
Now THAT I totally understand, dear tec (peace to you!). My problem is the "christian" trying to "avoid suffering." I don't understand that, given that our Lord is recorded to have said our enemies will be members of our own household. Some of these same folks will have absolutely NO hesitation at losing such loved ones for the sake of going INTO the WTBTS, however. For example, dear GaryNeal's experience. His wife is WILLING to lose HIM... for HER belief. Why? Because that is one of the FIRST things they teach a new Study ("Your worldly family is going to reject you"). Which is a LIE for the most part; it is THEY who perpetuate that kind of unloving conduct, they who do the rejecting.
But if staying is done out of love, then that's a lot different than if it's done out of cowardice.
Staying out of love, yes. For example, one has an elderly mother who may not even be able to fathom anything different than what they teach at this point, and relies on others, including her non-believing child, to get HER to meetings. Absolutely such one should help his mother, honoring her in that way. However, staying because one doesn't want to undergo the "suffering" one might have to for speaking the TRUTH is, IMHO, another thing entirely. It's in line with our Lord's words, "All things they SAY... do. But do not DO as they do." Meaning, dear brotherdan (peace to you!) should not inflict "suffering" upon his wife because SHE wants to still associate with them. He should "win" her... WITHOUT making her feel bad... WITHOUT forcing her to look at her beliefs... WITHOUT A WORD... but by HIS conduct. Which includes tolerance of what SHE believes.
I think that can only be a matter between the person and Christ.
You are right, of course. In the end, everything is. I think my point is, very often people chide me for hearing, etc., and ask silly questions like "What makes YOU 'better'?" Yet, their comments and conduct indicate that, really, their hearts are actually divided when it comes to the Christ. There ARE those they love more... and it is NOT always the spouse, parent, or child. Sometimes... it is themselves. They WILL give "all"... on behalf of their own skin... because they don't want to SUFFER. For ANY reason, let alone the sake of the Christ. But that's because they miss the POINT of faith, which is sublimely summed up by the writer of the letter to the Hebrews as to Moses and our Lord himself:
As to Moses... "he esteemed the REPROACH of the Christ as riches greater than the treasures of Egypt; for he looked intently toward the payment of the reward. By faith... he left Egypt, but NOT FEARING THE ANGER OF THE KING... for he continued STEADFAST as seeing the One who is INVISIBLE."
As to Christ... "Although he was a SON... he learned obedience FROM THE THINGS HE SUFFERED."
I am not speaking to those who don't believe - this has absolutely nothing to do with them. I am speaking to those who claim to believe. How can we escape LATER, when "she" is "burned with fire,"... when "sudden destruction" IS upon mankind... if we cannot do so NOW... when the opportunity is before us and our literal lives are not even at stake? The call is to GET OUT OF HER. What if your spouse, parent, child, other loved one... doesn't WANT to? What if YOUR staying... is what gives THEM the RESOLVE to stay?
I understand love of spouse, child, parent, others. I truly do. I am NOT saying it's easy, not at all. But I truly don't understand the divided loyalty. I mean, one can even still GO... for the sake of that spouse, child, parent, loved one. But I guess I just don't get the lies. I don't get how lying to them about such a thing is truly showing love. To me, it is showing that your spouse truly does not know you... that you don't really want them to... but only what you reveal to him/her... which revelation is a lie. Where is the love in that? Someone might say, "Well, I want to spare them." But is that the truth? Or is it that you want to spare yourself? Why not say, "Look, my love, I love you. I truly do. And I would do anything for you... except put my faith in her. If you want me to go, I'll go. For you. But I don't believe it, I won't believe it, and I won't participate - I can't, because I don't believe it, and I would be doing YOU a GREAT disservice... you, who I am one with... by being something I'm not and convincing you I am something I'm not and believe something I don't. BUT... I won't lie to you about this... even if you want me to. I love YOU... too much. But if my going is what will make you happy, certainly, I will do it. Just don't ask me to "eat" it. I won't, I can't."
What is WRONG with that? I know, I know... "he might leave me." Yes, he might. And isn't that HIS choice... to not be married to someone who doesn't believe what he does? If he's a TRUE "christian" (and I'm not even going as far as an anointing here, but simply someone who claims to follow Christ), isn't he SUPPOSED to endure such a situation... and try to "win" you back "WITHOUT a word?" Even the Bible sets forth the protocol for staying with an unbelieving mate. It does NOT grant a right to separation or divorce under such circumstances. THAT... is THEIR "tradition." Heck, going by "Paul's" list... there isn't even grounds to DF someone who no longer believes. The list at 1 Corinthians 5 doesn't even go there.
But are we to just GIVE them such power over us? Just hand it to them? How, then, are we truly christians... TRULY members of the Body of Christ? I'm sorry... but I just don't get it.
However, I DO wish you all... and particularly dear brotherdan... peace. In your daily lives... and your walk with Christ.
A slave of Christ,
SA
