Avoiding the Meeting

by brotherdan 70 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  OnTheWayOut

  There really is no good solid advice on how to get out of meetings that a spouse expects you to go to and avoid fights.
  A heart-to-heart talk with the wife might help.
  
  Some try a trade-off- "I go to one meeting and you ....
  .....give me one oral sex"
  .....go to one nightclub/sports event/meeting of something else."
  .....give me no grief about one day of golfing or fishing."

  Some spouses will tire of the tradeoff after awhile and just say "forget it."

  Many will never agree to tradeoffs and heart-to-hearts won't work. Then it's argument-city or sit at the KH.
• 

  Darth plaugeis

  I have MORE!!!!

  BrotherDan Realese your anger ... use YOUR HATE and COMPLETE your Journey to THE DARK SIDE!!!!!
• 

  simon17

  What I've found fairly helpful is the following: Say in advance, "look, on Thursday its going to be really tight for me to make it to the meeting, I think I'm going to go Tuesday instead." And actually go. She may go with you, fine. She may not (better... just bring something else to do).

  How does that help? Not at all. Buuuuut, it gives this major impression that the meetings are important to you and you dont want to miss them if you don't have to. It really shows something. Then, I've found future times that you have to miss last minute are questioned quite a bit less because you went out of your way to get to the meeting another time.

  Could backfire depending on the person... but worked for me.

  Another option is just saying you're sick and and are going to listen in on the telephone tie-in. Listen for 30 minutes enough to bring up a point when she returns (could be spiritual could just be something dumb the guy said but shows you listened) and then the night is mostly free.
• 

  brotherdan

  I'm not a wimp. I can make my stand. But she is going through the whole post partum depression thing right now and I'm trying to make this as easy as possible. I'm trying to save my family, if at all possible. So it's not a matter of growing a pair and putting my foot down right now. I will do it when the time comes. That doesn't scare me. But for now, I'm taking things slow.

  OTWO: Great advice! I really haven't tried the trade-off technique...
• 

  Darth plaugeis

  I tried the Trade off....

  I found my livingroom filled with Elders.

  I'm trying to think of some real good ones. It's been so long thou....

  I can still hear the Arguments like yesterday, but my excuses just..... dried up.
• 

  brotherdan

  That would be an embarassing elders meeting, Darth.

  "So, Brother Plaugeis, is it true that you told your wife that if she gave you a blow job you would go to the meeting?!?"
• 

  OUTLAW

  BrotherDan..

  I`m not suggesting your a Wimp..I know this is a tuff situation..

  Still..Like it or not..

  Your going to have to make some decisions..

  OTO is a good guy and he does come up with creative suggestions..

  They may work until you can figure out,what you want to do..

  .................. ...OUTLAW
• 

  Darth plaugeis

  Well it really happened......

  and it was about oral sex... one reason it was easy to leave. A 35 married man explaining to other men why I think Oral sex would be all right??

  And to be told I was wrong???

  so Trade off can Backfire..(try missing a meeting after that)

  so back to page one Excuses.....

  I'm trying
• 

  Married to the Mob

  Try the fun route!

  KH or go and do something fun and nice!
• 

  Watchtowers Witnesses

  But you have to go to the meeting to get the kool-aid. Where else will you go?

  As far as getting out of going, tell her you have explosive diarrhea.