It's official--I'm out. (page 5)

The Scotsman

I don't feel free. I've nothing to rejoice over. The woman I love is convinced that my path is wrong.

I feel for you man - a very difficult situation.

Many of us here have went through very similar experiences - I am certainly one of them. When I realsied it was not "the truth" I was still an elder, going to elders meetings etc. I knew deep down I would have to take a stand for what is right. If you look at some of my older posts you can read my story.

But my key point is the qoute I have added at the start of this comment. When I first stopped attending meetings I did not feel free, I felt lost! Also Mrs Scotsman was still going to meetings - she thought I was mad, she thought we would split up, she thought she would be in the paradise and I would not - it was a very emotional time for us - many tears were shed.

But despite this I felt I had to stand up for what is right - Jehovahs Witnesses are a mind control cult that ruin people's lives - I had to leave.

I managed to execute a successful fade - and the good news - Mrs Scotsman "eventually" followed me out. It was when this happened I started to feel free. Perhaps this will happen for you!!!

So a happy ending - yes - but not without some pain, some sacrifice, I lost many friends. But I have made new ones.

I suppose my main point is this - Their is life after Jehovahs Witnesses - it just may take a while to get there...

All the best for the future.

The Scotsman

MMXIV

Christopher,

I have read your posts with interest. Thank you for giving us a window into your life during your weeks of turmoil. Maybe in the course of time you can re-read them with a smile and wonder how a group of men who cared so little could manage to cause so much conflict in your life. Standing up to them took great courage. Leaving the borg inevitably has a fallout with family/friends - the borg's parting gift for all your years of service. Hope it works out with your wife.

Congrats

MMXIV

zoiks

Christopher,

I'm glad you are identifying with the human race, rather than as "disfellowshipped" or "a former JW". You've learned so much about JWs, the Organization, thought control, why your religion was not "right". Now you can learn and grow in truly positive ways.

Your newfound freedom can be used for so much good. Educate yourself in whatever subjects interest you. Stand for something - if nothing else at the moment, just be the best husband and father that you can be. At some point you may find yourself in the position to help others, to do good in meaningful ways.

I honestly believe that you will be fine. Now crack open a root beer and give yourself a hard-earned pat on the back.

snowbird

Brother Man, Christopher, - I mean that literally and figuratively - you will be just fine!

As you've found out, this board is a great place for comfort and understanding.

Jamie Bowers, I bow to you, great lady! I've been subjected to the same innuendos regarding a poster on here.

Quillsky, why do you feel a need to lecture people?

I'll shut up now ...

Sylvia

notverylikely

I'll shut up now ...

Don't do that.....

SD-7, you made a hard choice, this isn't the end of it. It will go on. I can 100% sympathize with the choice you had to make. It stinks that they can have so much control over your life even though you just want to talk away.

goldensky

Dear Sd-7, there's not much I can add to what everybody has already said. I just want you to know I'm thinking of you and wish you strentgh and inner peace. Love, OLGA.

The Oracle

Hi Sd-7!

And welcome to humanity.

As time goes by your memories of this odd sub-culture will fade and occupy a much smaller part of your mind.

Don't give up hope on your woman though!

Even the most entrenched and "faithful" JWs can have an awakening and shake themselves free from the tryranical grip of the Watchtower.

My wife and I are living proof of that!

Good luck on your new life!

The Oracle

babygirl30

Unfortunately, JWs give too much 'power' to themselves...for instance:

President = recognized all over the world

Doctor (Dr) = respected title in all the medical profession

Senator = recognized across state lines

Diplomat = national recognition

Disfellowshipped = um.............yeah.......ONLY JWs in a cong recognize this one!

See what I mean? See how SMALL that 'title' is when you really think about it and look at it? ONLY Jws recognize that title - so its so insignificant that it's sad. We (as ex-JWs) tend to give it MORE power then it deserves when in actuality WE have the power ourselves. You no longer are a JW...ok, so that now means that you're thinking and way of life can grow and change. JWs are taught that when you leave the fold, you automatically loose your f*ckin mind (like a dog that returns to his vomit???) and are gonna cheat, steal, kill, do drugs, dip your wick in any ol hole...I mean, come on!!! LOL. But it's not about bars, and flirting with women openly, or hanging out with coworkers AFTER work hours (oooh...the horror). IT's about being able to think for yourself. Give credit where credit is due - the org may have given you a moral compass, but YOU have control of it, not them.

Do I feel bad about how MY decision affected my family? YES - I do. It's just a part of me to care about what people think and NOT to do anything to intentionally hurt them. BUT this - my getting DF'd - was NOT intentionally 'my choice' at all. It was a choice of 3 men who had NO real idea what I went through or why I made the mistakes I made. THEY are the one that pulled that rug out from under me...they are the ones that created a scenario where my family would be torn apart...they too are accountable to Jehovah for their actions and decision. Same with you! Your wife, although still in the org, is not blind to what goes on - I'm sure. Ok, so you may have hurt her by deciding to leave the org, but I believe you HONOR her by being honest, keeping her involved in how you feel and think, and considering what would be best for your FAMILY (as a whole). If you were to stay in the org and feel the way you do now, you would be 'lying' to yourself and to her...and what kind of relationship is that? TRUST = LOVE and so if you're not being honest....well...that speaks for itself. You stood up for what you believe, you took what the elders dished out, and now you are on the other side. WELCOME!!!! It's gonna be scarey, confusing, hard, and then scarey again...hahahahaha...but you have 'us' here on this board AND you will find that non-JWs come out the wordwork. I swear, your persona is going to change and you will find that you draw people IN more that want to get to know you and befriend you.

Trust - it'll all work out.

jamiebowers

Wow. Jamiebowers, your response to me is probably the most defensive and simultaneously offensive I've ever seen on an internet forum.

Are you okay?

Clearly you don't welcome dialogue, intellectual exploration or any kind of conversation. Perhaps you prefer to interact on a different type of forum, maybe not a discussion forum? Do you mainly post on boards where people send kitten pictures to each other?

There was no intellectual discussion going on when you used the term "afterglow" which clearly has sexual connotations. And your "dialogue" about me meeting Christopher at a bar was mistaken at best and slanderous at worst.

Christopher, I'm sorry for my part in derailing your thread. As always, you made a beautiful, heartfelt post. You just keep proving over and over what an intelligent, talented, thoughtful young man you are.

Married to the Mob

Christopher

You have always been a member of the human race, they (the borg) just didn't want you to associate with rest of us in the human race!

Remember to keep your chin up, nose clean and don't let the buggers grind you down.

Your doing great!

MTTM

It's official--I'm out.

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