I'm going to be serious right now and I hate doing that. But if you really want to know why I am the way I am I will tell you.
I have been through so much crap in my life I had to sit down and take a good look at myself to see if I was bringing a lot of it on myself. In doing that I try to see myself as others might. It is all in ones perspective. If I only looked at things through my eyes I would limit my ability to understand both sides of any issue I am presented with. If I continued to only try and see things from my perspective I would become stagnate and never grow or learn as a person.
Several years ago I heard a speaker who was addressing a MENSA conference. That is a little club of people with big brains and bigger egos. The speaker was a lady (I don't recall her name) who was considered at the time to have the highest IQ in the world. She was asked what she contributed her extreamly high intelligence to and she answered it in very simple way. She said " I keep an open mind on everything". That thought has always stuck with me.
I constantly try to put myself in others shoes and gain an insight about where they are coming from. I do not look at a line as only being straight but also curved and wiggly. When someone says draw a line 99% of the people will draw a straight line. Thats what we are programed to do and the way we are programed to think. I try and adjust my perspective to have a glimpse of where others may be coming from so I can more accurately compare it to my own perspective. I do not have an ego so big that I will not allow myself to make a mistake and then try to deny the mistake. A line is not always straight and things are not always as we think we seem them. That includes how we see ourselves.
Everyone makes mistakes but only those who can realize that, accept it and learn from it can continue to grow. Once you have closed your mind to alternative thinking than your own, you will stop growing and learning. I do not fully accept all ways of thinking and make them my own but rather I try to understand why that alternative thinking exist. Once you understand where someone is coming from you can better have an interactive dialog with them. You do not have to accept their way of thinking but you can understand why they think that way and respect them for it.
Every concept and particular way of thinking has a reason behind it. Whether it is from a dug addict, hooker, cop, priest, monk, truck driver, school teacher, politician or little child. They all have their perspective on life. If you can take just a little time trying to understand their perspective as opposed to just their expressed way of thinking you can deal with any given situation. I don't like rednecks, bigots, evangelist, cheaters, liars, drunks etc. But, if I know why they have those thoughts and feelings on their life I might be able to help them gain a little different perspective or at lest understand why they are the way they are. It's all in how much someone wants to learn and do whats right in their life in relation to how it effects other people.
I do not let any religious, political, racial, national, or ethnic philosophy influence my particular perspective. To let that happen I would have to allow someone else's perspective to become mine.
As long as I can keep an open mind and use it with complete and total freedom of thought I can make some pretty decent decisions in my life. I still have a lot to learn. I will still make mistakes. As long as I realize that and accept that I will continue to grow and understand others.
It is hard for a person to do battle with you if you tell them you understand where they are coming from. It is hard for a person to tell you off if you tell your self off first. Add a little humor and human compassion and you no longer have a foe. The disagreement or issue in conflict is better understood if you can admit the possibility of being wrong whether you fell you are or not. It's looking at the big picture and taking the other person out of the defensive mode. Do you gain more respect by telling someone to fuck off or by saying you are sorry if you upset them. People who are upset with you expect you to react to them in like manner. When you don't, it throws them off. Who cares who wins what or who can call the other person the more offensive name? Sometimes it just feels good to chew someone out, but what does it really accomplish? Nothing. Sitting back and saying "I could be wrong so lets talk about it" does much more.
It's respect, perspective, big picture and keeping an open mind. If that all fails, then I smoke crack.
I hope this give you a little idea of who I am and how I think.
Next week we will discuss the male ego and how to use sympathy, onion juice in your eyes and a cute little puppy to get laid.