Oh, and yes, the elders know he isn't providing.
Im new....posting hesitantly :)
Hello Mouthy :)
"Meantime he's playing the field with a heap of girls, this I have proof, but acting all holy and going to meetings."
Yup, he lives in another country and you have this knowledge. Tell's me you haven't begun to move on. Focus on financial support for the children, and then focus on yourself. "F" him and anyone (reference JWs) who think nothing of your financial needs. Move on emotionally most of all. I don't think you'll find that in a JW atmosphere as well.
I sound greedy but I wouldn't be asking for a mansion by the bay. Just the necessities for the children.
Down the road, you'll find better love. No need to rush it.
Welcom WTL! Many of us have been in similar positions as you so you will find a lot of empathy. I divorced my husband for non-support when I still believed JWs had the truth and the elders were NOT happy with me. It was in this circumstance that I realized that God had nothing to do with this organization. Later I started to research the validity of many of the teachings. This thread has a bunch of my research. You may want to pass it along to your brother.
Pleasure to meet you.
Welcome aboard WTL!
Here are some important verses
John 8:31-36 (New International Version)
The Children of Abraham
31 To the Jews who had believed him, Jesus said, "If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. 32 Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free."
33 They answered him, "We are Abraham's descendants and have never been slaves of anyone. How can you say that we shall be set free?"
34 Jesus replied, "I tell you the truth, everyone who sins is a slave to sin. 35 Now a slave has no permanent place in the family, but a son belongs to it forever. 36 So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.
Following Jesus is the truth, not the WT. Jesus sets you free but the WT enslaves those who follow.
All the best,
wantstoleave ..........Are you truly fed up with the WTBTS ruling your life ? Are you ready to be grown up and take charge of yourself and children ?
Fear IS the only thing holding you back . Get through that imagined fear and YOU will have such a new wonderful life ahead of you .
Yes I do understand ALL the mixed feelings you described and YES it is all part of escaping a mind controlling sect that has influenced your whole life experience . NOW it is time for you to change all that and take charge of your own life .
Take the advice from others that have already been in the place you are now : Read , educate yourself about mind control . Steve Hasson's books . Then free yourself from the Watchtower think that they are "Gods" chosen channel of communication to mankind ,to help on this point read Ray Franz books . Do not be afraid that some evil spirit is going to attack you for reading a book .....that is just another fear tactic they use to keep you under control . Mr Franz gives an insiders view of how the organization is run and he is not filled with ego or hate, just an open realistic view .
It angers me how the watchtower society takes and Bible principles and twists every bit of the mercy out of it into something I am sure God never intended . The divorce principle was suppose to be a protection for older wives so their husbands would not abandon them in their older age . YOUR husband has already abandonned you and his family HE is choosing this way of life ,it is all on him . You have no choice but to cut legal ties and move on . HE HAS ENDED your marriage period . No group of uneducated men should have any say in what you chose to do about it . As far as the part of being free to re marry COME on use common sense. Do you really think God would think it is wrong for you to move on ?? Would not a God of love and mercy WANT you to be happy and fulfilled , and wouldn't it make him happy if another man took the responsibility of helping raise your children ?
Keep thinking of a God of love and mercy and forget the rule making ,legalistic diety you have been brainwashed into accepting .
I hope the best for you . Yes you are in a scary transition time in your life ,but have confidence it could be the first day of the REST of your life . Be excited for your children for they may now be able to have a normal ,happy childhood ....it is up to their mother .
Hi Troubled...thankyou :) I like how you point out about a God of mercy....I think that is something often overlooked and forgotten. That through all the different levels of 'power' within the organisation, God has stopped being real. Its almost as if serving man is what has happened. I believe in God...but like you said, I cannot see how a merciful, loving God would want his people to suffer in unhappiness. You've given me food for thought, as has everyone else on this thread....I thank you all so much :)
Hi there. My heart goes out to you.
Doubts are difficult things to deal with. JW's teach that doubts are wrong, even though to doubt is the only way to learn the truth. (why do little kids ask "why" so much when they are young? They doubt, and they need more reasons and answers... We all are natural born doubters. Its how we learn)
This thread: the big black hole of belief was good, and there is another thread by Narkissos that was excellent as well. It speaks to the void that must be purposefully filled by us individually when we learn that JW's do not have the truth.
It is my opinion that we always try to tell ourselves what we really think, but so often, a person or group steps in with their own agenda. The fact that you still believe in god is a great thing. What that means to you though, is something only you can answer.
Listen to what you are trying to tell yourself. You won't have to "remake" yourself. You only need to discover who you already are, and follow that road.
I truly wish you the best....
(I didnt get email notification of your replies....how can I arrange that?)
This board and many like it do not give email notification of replies. This one doesn't give email notification of Personal messages either. You need to check back on the board for replies and check every so often on the personal messages (PM's). To check PM's, click on the envelope at the top right of the page when you are logged in- next to your name. Also, you can click on your name and then click on the TOPICS POSTED ON and go to the last one to see the most recent things you said.
It's tricky, but you will get the hang of it.
Nevertheless, I am divorcing him.
That seems like a smart step. He left. You have to protect your children and any assets you acquire in the future. Don't worry too much about the next steps. You should know what to do later.