AMAZING - Exposing Elders (re: Expose Ave...

by AMNESIAN 126 Replies latest jw friends

  • SixofNine
    SixofNine

    I think it is good to realise that the biggest problem with the elder arrangement is not that they are often buffoons who mess up others lives (even though that is true), the problem is that they do not need to exist. The elder arrangement does not need to exist.

    Humans do not need shepherding. Sheep need shepherding. Humans do not need persons in authority over them. They don't need Elders, priest, bishops, nuns, or any other religious authoritarian types. And if all those "types" could be dumped into the sea tomorrow, then humans would likely not need mental health professionals.

  • Frenchy
    Frenchy

    ::: Frenchy,you disgust me, etc….::: --Tina

    It’s been my experience that personal attacks are the weapon of those who lack substance for their argument. It is indeed a very poor substitute for reasoning.

    Personal attacks against me are a totally wasted effort, I assure you as I am not easily riled. I thought I’d pass this information on to you since you don’t know me. Perhaps it will save you some typing in the future. I never resort to profanity and will only on rare occasions quote it for the sake of a reply. I am neither shocked nor impressed by it and like the personal innuendoes, it is totally wasted on me other than to serve as an indication of the very limited vocabulary of the one that is using it.

  • JT
    JT

    6 of 9

    great post and while i fully understand the views mentioned about the elders i see so many missing a major point about the SYSTEM

    CASE IN POINT

    my wife and I were discussing a few min ago how the System works

    you have a bro or sister who has a Masters Degree, educated person- in fact working on their PHD.

    they move to Backwaters, Miss with 4 elders in the congo, top elder the PO finished the 7th grade. those dudes can't read well-can't speak proper English and like me can't spell well--

    now WHY , WHY IN THE WORLD would an educated person be willing to submit to some clowns like this??????????

    because they Believe in THE SYSTEM.

    a few weeks back a gave an example of what happened in my hall-

    we have a sister who is a Dr and she brought another Dr to the bookstudy, but i wasn't there or my assistance- so this old MS had to conduct and he TRIED to read as well

    anyway after the meeting the visiting Dr told the sister basically that she thought the guy conducting was Damn Fool- smile

    while the sister was trying to explain away what she deep down inside knew- he was not even qualified according to wt standards

    yet she had to accept him as her HEAD and why cause he had a "Peter" between his legs-

    now the other lady who didn't believe in THE SYSTEM was free to call a spade a spade - jackass a jackass WITH no fear that god would rain down fire and sulfur on her- yet the sister despite her gut feeling and intelligence put it all on the back burner so as to accept THE SYSTEM

    SO YEA THE ELDERS ARE as someone mentioned the front men, but then again they too walk into the Oven of believing the SYSTEM like everone else-

    i have been to congo where the sisters were sharper than then Elders

    yet these women SUBMITTED themselves to these fools and when those types of women get feed up enough they ROLL out of the org

    my wife was like that

    she hated being told by the wt publications to RESPECT FOOLISH MEN just because they were males and had a badge called elder on their jackets-

    in my personal opinion the wt has so carefully programmed all of us with that one KEY file called "fds.dll" that is located in the C:\watchtower\system folder --SMILE

    they have also provided 1000's of "fds.bak" files just in case the "fds.dll" goes bad or becomes corrupted. and this is how it works

    when I first left wt i wanted to know how in the world could i have beed duped for so long, yes hoodwinked and bamboozled. folks had always told me James you are a pretty sharp dude- so how did they get over on me like that-

    well i read and read as much as i could find on High Control groups like wt and others and i begin to see the constant thread of continuing to connect themselves to the Divine One

    and once they convinced you of thier Divine backing the rest was easy and esp if they got you to believe that you should not read anything else. and being brought up as a child all my most trusted figures kept telling me THIS IS THE WAY.

    tHE AVG JW HAS so well been convinced even many elders that to get any info on the NET about jw is 100% wrong

    so once we start to doubt or have questions those "fds.dll" files will kick in like clock work and what does that file say:

    It says ------"Yes there are problems in the congo, sisters don't speak to you , elders treat you wrong, even some sex going on , we got this Dogma wrong-- BUT-- IN DUE TIME JAH WILL CLEAN IT OUT - YOU JUST NEED TO BE LOYAL AND WAIT ON JAH"

    and it is this file i personally believe is the one that keeps pubs,Ms, Elders and others holding on waiting for something that will never happen to happen

    just my 2

    glsthe first thi

  • DannyBear
    DannyBear

    After reading everyone's additional comments, since my last post, I must say we all seem to be on the same page. In fact I don't think I have ever seen so much agreement in one place, here on jw.com before!

    JT some subtleties of disagreement with your comments;

    When I first read one of your posts on H2O, it was very apparent to me, that you were a former Bethelite. Your word choices like 'boys in writing' rang with authenticity, your view of the organization was biased (like working in the home office of any major corp), it is the very same bias I witnessed in my parents, and every other long time bethelite/missionary I knew while in the org. Even in your ex-jw status, a measure of respect and admiration still remains for some of your former bethel comrades. Agreed?

    All of you guy's living and working at Bethel, are still today, considered to be the cream of the crop in Watchtower Land. Even those who left with 'dishonorable discharges', returned to thier former congregations with the 'crown' of a title 'former Bethelite'. Often as in the case of my first 'slimey' pioneer partner, thier ignominious departure rather than causing them harm, actually escalated thier promotion to 'offices' and assignments in the congregaton, they had no business holding.

    So your views, imo are often tainted just simply by your former status, as are all of ours. Not good or bad, just a fact.

    In one of my posts I tried to extracate 'Jehovah of Armies' from the discussion, all the emotional 'spirit annointed', love of god, blah blah. And tried to look at the 'shell'(your's I believe) the system of jwdom. It's very hard to extract this pervasive influence, but when you do, the organizational system can be clearly seen as just another corporate entity, without all the magical myth's surrounding it.

    Based on the above, the shell (the whole system)is held together by it management personnel. Like Alan said from GB to MS...and I will add pioneer's. The WTBS is unlike many corporate enterprises, they need, they require tons of 'middle management' to succeed. They will resort to any lengths, even forgoing specific Bible instruction, to assure all management positions are filled or covered (yes even by the lowly sister's in the cong).

    What does that indicate? They would collapse without 'yes' men or women, to carry out thier policies and will. Elder's, Co's on the front line to accomplish these staffing issues.

    So whats my point, Iam asking myself?

    Simply this, you can argue in circles about who is more responsible the r&f or the upper management, until your blue in the face, but the unmitigated truth is without all the power positions...'APPOINTED BY SPIRT' the average everyday jw with no power no appointment, would simply go home and wait for his/her order's.

    There are millions of these everyday witnesses, who have no say, no influence over thier appointed task master's....overwhelmed with 'yes' men/women as they are.

    Danny

  • waiting
    waiting

    Howdy y'all,

    I've been reading along - as my laptop travels well with me out of town, but I've just been too tired & too wined to speak up. Well, some might consider that a blessing, eh?

    There are soooo many good points that have been made by various ones. I don't believe that any of us- the R&F, elders, CO, etc., weren't true believers - and then truly shut our brains off - at one time or another, sometimes for decades. I know I did - and I have years of Prozac to prove it.

    We are all culpable, some more, some less. But we all made the choice. I read where kids say they had no choice - but not sure that's totally correct. At one time or another, we could have all walked.....and almost all here.....did.

    Did I look up to the elders? Yep. Did I know some of them were stupid, small minded, petty? Yep. Why did I do it? "Because they're good men trying to do God's will...and they have God's spirit upon them." Which gave the strong impression that I didn't. But I could have walked - I didn't, as I believed it was The Truth.....and that makes me, a woman and R&F, as culpable as the next person. The next person is not much smarter than me - I made the choice, or lack thereof.

    It's not that much different than priests, ministers, etc. We allowed them to rule over us. They humbly demanded it, along with the WTBTS, and we gave it. We could have walked earlier - and it would have cost us - but we could have.

    We all played the game - and we were damned for it. At least now, we have a semblance of 20/20 - and the freedom to remake our lives as best as possible.

    And that IS a lot better than some followers achieve, as Jim Jones was brought into the discussion.

    waiting

  • larc
    larc

    Folks,

    I have to make some assumptions regarding all the posters here. If you are an exception, I would like to know about it. At one time you believed that you had the truth and you were part of God's organization. As such you were, willingly, a yes man/woman, to use Danny's term. If you pioneered you did so because you thought it was the right thing to do. If you were asked to take on more responsibility, from carrying the mic to becoming an elder, you also did that as a "privelege of service". At whatever level you found yourself, you tended to rationalize the problems you saw and justify the organization. When you left, it took some time before you realized it was the right thing to do. Even then, some of you had to "plan your escape" as Amazing did, so that you could get your family out. Now, you are at the point of trying to figure out who was at fault in all this. It feels better to blame someone else rather than to take personal responsibility. I take a different point of view all together. You can't know you were doing wrong until you finaly figure it out. You may regret what you did and try to make amends where you can, but there is no point in beating yourself up over it, because you simply didn't know any better at the time. There is no point in berating those who are still in and can't see what you do now. Bottom line, you were in a bad system and there is no point of blaming anyone, either yourself, someone who was at a higher level than you, or those still trapped in the system. My bias is towards an understanding of what happened and what we can do about it, with a rejection of moralizing and blaming. Blame others and you will feel guilt free and angry. Blame yourself and you will feel stupid and depressed. Blame no one and move on, and you will have a better life, in my opinion.

    I have tryed to live by the ideas expressed in the last few sentences. I have I made mistakes in my life? Yes, some big ones. Have I done some wrong things. Yes, I have. Do I feel guilt, and self blame. Not one bit. I did the best I knew at the time. Do I blame others who caused me problems in life. No, it is a waste of time and I don't to choose to dwell on it. In short, I try to live without guilt or blame. They don't work for me.

  • DannyBear
    DannyBear

    larc,

    I think you offer conciliation, where none is needed. I have read every post to this thread, some several times, I see little if any personal "blame" being ascribed.

    Instead I see some reevaluation of the dynamics of a cult.

    It is no secret that a few former cult member's, wether due to recent exodus or 'brain farts' , have continued to uphold thier former conduct as a cult member, based solely on thier PERCIEVED good motives, intentions, and actions while acting in some appointed position in the cult.

    One of these former 'good elder' has already admitted that he probably has, unwittingly though it may be, retained some or more of the belief system, he was once enslaved to.

    To me that is progress, not futility.

    These few pages of reasoned and yet often very pointed arguments, are one of the reason's jw.com is so valuable.

    If we do nothing more than clear the air, express our remorse, vent some anger, it is one of the best healing exercises we can perform.

    So although I agree with your premise, the effect of your statement tends to put a negative bent on our discussions. I don't think you intended it, but that is the way it came across to me.

    Danny

  • larc
    larc

    Danny,

    No, I did not mean to disparage anyone else's point of view. I only meant to express my own. My own is my own and not necessarily right or wrong. I have been out for a very long time. By stint of my formal education and the distance from the religion, I have come to form a particular philosophy. I don't think in terms of right - wrong, good - bad, moral - immoral. Now, I am not saying others should think like this. I am just describing how I think. How do I think, in terms of concepts that mean something to me? I think in terms of success - failure, good decisions - poor ones. For me guilt is a worthless concept. Now, that is for me and me only, as I said. I think in terms of mistakes, correcting them and not making them again.

  • waiting
  • GinnyTosken
    GinnyTosken

    Teejay,

    Elders are the grease that moves the org. As Danny said below, if all of the elders who have what remained of a good conscience decided to leave, the org. would fold tomorrow.
    Elders are part of the grease that moves the organization. What if all of the publishers fell out of their seats laughing when told to shun someone? What if publishers stopped going out in field service? What if they stopped buying literature?

    Elders are responsible for setting the tone of the entire cong. They 'teach': (public talks, what they consider "special needs" & assembly parts, etc.).
    Elders may see themselves as responsible for setting the tone of the congregation, but I think the publishers also have a large share in this. I’m thinking of different congregations I visited while I was one of Jehovah’s Witnesses. Some were conservative, some were liberal, some were warm and friendly, others were more reserved. From what I observed, this seemed primarily determined by the demographics of the area, not by the elders alone.

    As for the teaching of elders, public talks were composed around prefabricated outlines. The bulk of material for other meetings was Society literature. Special needs talks may have focused on a particular aspect of Society dogma, but the information was not new—it was only repeated.

    For me, the Circuit Overseer’s visit was a break from the monotony of our regular speakers and meant the possibility of a slide show on Sunday.

    The District Overseer? A name on a convention program. The Society could have hired a worldly professional speaker, and I wouldn’t have known the difference.

    Depending on the elder and his current agenda, he can box a 'rebellious' person or even family into a corner and more or less FORCE them to comply with the rules. In the judicial process, their power over people (and the likelihood of permanent harm) is clearest.
    What does the elder use to force people to comply? Isn’t it usually the threat of disfellowshipping? Can an elder mete out the punishment of disfellowshipping alone? Doesn’t it take an entire congregation to make the punishment sting?

    Think about a judge in a courtroom. A judge does not write the law; a judge listens to evidence and determines whether a person is guilty of breaking established law. Neither does a judge personally punish those who are found guilty of breaking the law; that is left to law enforcement officials.

    If we are going to try to assign culpability fairly, I think it should be divided between those who write the laws, those who judge, those who enforce the decision by shunning, and those who support and advocate the law as something good.

    Said simply, no publisher can influence as many people or as strongly as the average elder. Those who try to deny this simple fact is either delusional or worse.
    I question your assumption. I’ve already mentioned those in the congregation who I felt had the largest influence over me. The opinions of the pioneer brother who studied with my parents held more weight in our family than that of the elders. The withering looks of several sisters in our congregation kept even elders in line at get-togethers.

    If the beliefs themselves strongly influence people, I’d think that the person who is most effective in spreading and reinforcing the beliefs has the greatest influence. That is why I went back to the issues of recruitment and how my beliefs were reinforced.

    I understand the hazards of subjective evidence. To settle the question, we’d need to do a study or survey to find out what or who has the greatest influence on Jehovah’s Witnesses. The beliefs themselves? Fear of elders? Fear of shunning? Peer pressure? I don’t know what is true for most; I only know what was true in the case of myself and my family.

    Both. Yet, have you never known of publishers who found it within their conscience to, let's say, allow their kid to go to college (despite all of the words in all of the Watchtowers) but were coerced to comply only because of the lead the elders took in causing tons of grief for the kid and his family? And I'd prefer anyone not say that in this case it was the parent's "trained conscience" that molded his/her behavior. That is a lie. Neither is it true to call it "peer pressure" because one's peers are under the same exact pressure to comply.
    I have not personally known anyone who was coerced by elders to refrain from attending college.

    I went to college myself as a baptized Jehovah's Witness, and the elders did not say a word to me, even though this was back in the days when college was frowned upon. My father was the one who threatened me. “If you go to college, don’t ever come home.” Friends in the congregation talked to me. “Be careful. Keep going to meetings.”

    When I moved to the college dormitory, I did attend meetings at first. The elders at the new congregation said nothing. No one ever inquired about my courses, even though I took a risqué course for a Jehovah's Witness—“Ideas and Modern Man,” full of worldly philosophy and including a comparison of various creation myths. A pioneer couple picked me up for meetings, and they once chided me when I began talking about dinosaurs and glaciers. Besides my father, that is the only form of reproof I received.

    How much harm could a belt inflict on its own without someone wielding it?
    And how much harm could a person inflict if he flailed his arms in the air at someone? Laws, judges, law enforcers, and those who subject themselves to law are all interdependent.

    The rules are there, sure, but elders always have the option of turning a blind eye and letting people live as they see fit, regardless of what a magazine says. If he makes that a habit, however, he won't hold his position long and he knows it. He'd rather keep his position with its perks than do the right thing. This brings us right back to the influence he wields to make sure that a)the cong is ship-shape, and b) he keeps his position.
    You presume to know the motives of most elders—position and perks. I refrain from making this presumption.

    Elders decided what articles were written; wrote the articles; emphasized the main points of the articles you read; in various ways punnished those who didn't comply. The influence of elders was all around you... you were just never aware of it.
    My comments were made in response to a paragraph in which you mentioned local elders. The elders who decided what articles were written and wrote them had a large influence on my life. Yes, elders emphasized main points in articles I read. Elders judged those who didn’t comply; all of us who shunned participated in punishing. Yes, the influence of elders was all around me. I am simply trying to rate that influence in comparison with other factors.

    Trust me.
    LOL!

    Same here. I can't say whether there are men out there who came to the same understanding as, let's say, Bill did of the Wt's pedo policy. Of the thousands that are out there, tho, I'd guess there were SOME who remain elders. If I'm right, what would be their reasoning for staying in such a corrupt organization? Whatever the reason, that man would be under a serious moral obligation to do everything he possibly could to right every wrong he encountered from that point on whatever it was. Do some do that? Who knows.
    I don’t know either. This is why I hesitate to assign a larger share of culpability to elders as a group without knowing individual circumstances.

    Without knowing why a man continues to be an elder, I will not judge him just because he is an elder.

    Same here. Please don't attempt to change the focus and nature of this debate in mid-stream. No one here is "judging" anyone. I'm not and no one is saying you are, either.

    I could have phrased my sentence more clearly: “Without knowing why a man continues to be an elder, I will not judge him as more culpable just because he is an elder.”

    In a nutshell, we're simply discussing whether in the congregation elders bear more accountability for the harms that come to people than publishers. I think the argument that the accountability factor is equal is false, if not outright disingenuous.
    I haven’t seen anyone argue that accountability is equal. Like Amnesian, I’m looking for the truth between the poles of Elders 100% accountable – Publishers 0% accountable. I am uncertain about your assessment that the difference between publishers and elders (I’m thinking of local ones) is huge. Individual circumstances and motives vary so much that I think it’s dangerous to even try to make group generalizations about culpability.

    While the questions are interesting, I feel the exercise is rather pointless. Suppose that everyone in this thread comes to agreement in assigning percentages of culpability. What then?

    I am more interested in what causes the harm and how to stop it. I think the beliefs themselves are more powerful than any individuals, no matter what their rank in the Watchtower hierarchy.

    Ginny

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