I hate the CO

by superman 54 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Pistoff

  The elders in my hall, I was an MS at the time, told me I should fire my recently df'd nephew. I told him that was illegal, and besides, he was my flesh and blood, planned to come back and I was not going to fire him. They were quite pissed.

  Several years later I interviewed an ex bethelite for a job; before I hired him he asked to be df'd for some reason. I asked him what he planned to do, he said work his way back in, and so I hired him.

  Now the elders were really pissed. They told me that anyone who hired a df'd person lacked spirituality; I told them they were welcome to their opinion but I hired him and that was it.

  They really just take the cake.
• 

  C. T. Russell

  In the Circuit I'm from this had always been enforced. It may be different in other areas. If an Elder has a child that doesn't seem to be progressing, his duties as "Head of Houshold" take precedence. It's not really something new.
• 

  carla

  Can't she use the 'Jesus wasn't baptized until He was 30' excuse? (jw's- 30 or 33?) She is trying to emulate Christ in all things?
• 

  restrangled

  I was asked to leave at 17 if I didn't want to listen to Jehovah...(go to meetings). I wasn't a bad teenager. I was working, paid rent, and did my chores. I didn't do drugs or stay out at night. That was 1976. I did move out.

  Fast forward to 2006, (I've mentioned this on other threads but will post it here again.) Local CO comes to town. My mom is still desperate to get me to come to meetings. I am not Df'd or DA'd, been out since 1976 but I smoke. Mom feels guilty that we are good friends and do everything together. CO tells her, shun me completely, it is her obligation to do so, and that should shock me back into the organization.

  It backfired. I found JWD instead.

  r.
• 

  ziddina

  ReStrangled, I just love it when the WTBTS' hard- line [hard-A$$] attitude backfires and they lose yet another member! Zid
• 

  truthsetsonefree

  Superman, this is SOP. Some CO's look the other way because they know how dangerous it is to be giving personal advice like this. Oh you won't find this explicitly in writing but it is the way things are supposed to be run as dictated by KM extension classes and meetings that the CO has with the elder body. Anyone who has an adult child who is not progressively moving towards baptism is to disqualified from "special privilieges" as it sets a "bad example" for the congregation. And yes it's stupid, and dangerous. And yet as mentioned it often works in our favor as the kids often simply move out and leave the cult.
• 

  sammielee24

  I'm with BB on this... However, if it is true- he's doing his own thing. I've never heard of the society saying anything like this. They may encourage early baptism, but that's about it...

  So...you've both been Elders then???? You know for a fact that the society wouldn't do this right??

  I was an Elder for over 20 years and in the congregations I was in, you'd better have your kids baptized by the time they were 18 or face deletion. In fact, the pressure is on long before the age of 18 and no CO would have had to tell them what to do, the other Elders would have taken steps to turf me on their own if I hadn't made sure my kids followed through. It's expected that those rules will be followed whether or not they are written down by the Society - they are part of the rules.
• 

  OnTheWayOut

  I hate when the members are sooooo blind beyond the obedience to the doctrine that they are led by morons like this C.O..

  I fully understand how the Borg does this headgame with the members, but your Dad has to assert himself to this bully.
  Maybe Mom will put pressure on Dad to just let them force him out of his eldership.

  He really ought to say, "Ok, fine. If I have to go beyond the rules to keep my 'title' then I don't want it."
  Maybe you can help him to see that. Even if she is kicked out of the house, he should still see that this is beyond the love that Christians are supposed to show, and the rules and the JW men are the ones dividing family.
  
  Try quoting the July 09 Awake to Dad about how nobody should be forced to choose between family and beliefs.

  Edited to add: This pressure from the C.O. would be a great way for someone to step away from responsibilities and save face- "I cannot kick my daughter out." If only he wanted to step away.
• 

  FlyingHighNow

  I'm sorry, but my kids come first. No one will tell me to have my kids or grandkids move out of my house before they are ready to. How could being an elder be more important than your own children's welfare? And besides, if you really believe the WT doctrine and practices, then you realize that throwing your kids or relatives out for no good reason might make them NEVER want to study with the JWs, much less be baptized.

  "Paranoia strikes deep
  Into your life it will creep
  It starts when you're always afraid
  You step out of line, the man come and take you away." From For What It's Worth by Buffalo Springfield.

  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ehzRS8mZOFM&feature=related
• 

  yknot

  Yep

  That is the perfect JW life envisioned by TED and his loyal supporters!

  Remember the news tidbit last month from the Czech Republic... http://praguemonitor.com/2009/04/30/parents-prosecuted-forcing-girl-join-religious-group , this is worldwide yall!

  I know children (who are turning 18 while still in HS) who have been told as baptized publishers that they must pioneer or leave after graduation.

  This is why 18 year old JW girls get married! (My sister and 4 others either before graduation or within a week of school ending)

  It isn't stoppable if your parents are already considering it as a viable option. Please make sure she fills out the FASFA and enrolls in college, give her some guidance regarding employment, and some limited responsibility around the house because she is still a developing teen in need of structure and direction. Also have her go and apply for state resources (including birth control!). Actually if she is still in HS when she turns 18 I would consider talking to your state's child protective services and see if you or your sister can't take her on for the remain school year as a foster child. Some state pay full college tuition for foster children too! ..... I would also consider talking to the local papers about her plight and the cruelty of the WTS!

  Tell her we are rooting for her success through this impending tribulation and she is lucky to have such great loving siblings!