Thank you, Flipper.
Gents, now you pls explain...
by Newborn 62 Replies latest jw friends
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flipper
FHN- Happy to oblige sis. To me it's just a case of showing common courtesy to others and not exploiting people ; whether it's a man exploiting a woman, or a woman exploiting a man. I've never felt it's too hard to treat people with normal human dignity so they are left with their pride intact. It's not too much to ask . Peace out, Mr. Flipper
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SixofNine
Six, Newborn has told on other threads that he's from across the ocean. In her case she thought there was a relationship.
I think you're wrong on both counts, although she did say she felt as if she was falling in love after the first date, last monday (but no one could really imagine that is a "relationship"). Second date on Tues. Guy said it was going too fast on Wed. Got together this past weekend again.
And dumped may not always apply. Sometimes a girl thinks the guy really likes her because the guy says he does. And in other cases the man is snowing her: Why, she's the girl he's dreamed of all his life and he just knows she's the one. I'm sure some of the ladies on this forum have heard the lines.
I'm sure they have; even know of a few specific cases. But we have no such indication in this particular case.
When a guy tells a girl anything he thinks she wants to hear just to get her to drop her drawers and once she does, he leaves her flat on her backside and is off to the next conquest. Not all guys are like this. Enough of them are though. And if a woman is looking for more than casual sex, she needs to be careful who she drops her guard with.
Seems to me the anti-dote for that is not to preach romance novel/cheap ladies magazine style romance (and that's what you do, whether you've read a romance novel or not), guys will just play that game if that's what it takes -hell, if anything it gives some men a license to play games.... but rather to preach: "Ladies, grow up emotionally and learn some basic skepticism and relationship skills. Have fun as you choose (and don't then "regret" the fun you chose, because that would be fckuing retarded, and that's what we don't want, because your mother and I both love you very much), and invest your emotions based on reality, not what you wish for".
Maybe this guy had good intentions. Maybe he wasn't a sleaze. Maybe he just didn't know her well enough and after three meetings decided he couldn't do the long distance thing.
Still don't know where you got the long distance thing. Knowing you as well as I do, and I dont, you've probably already picked out flowers for Elsewhere and Newborn's wedding though. (just try to interpret that, lol) Anyway, none of us has any idea what the guy is thinking.
But she's left knowing she was intimate with this person who doesn't bother to let her know why he isn't calling anymore. The regret, if there is any, may be more in feeling used than it is about the sex.
Er, why? W/o more information, there is no reason to believe that anyone got "used" more than anyone else. One person wanting to continue or speed up a relationship tells us nothing about the user/usee ratio of the two people.
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FlyingHighNow
Maybe I have newborn confused with another poster. The one who has not been getting answers to her texts?
Hey, six, I'm not big on marriage. I think it's great for some people, but I'm personally very burned out on it. And I feel special that you are taking so much time to analyze all my posts.
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lola28
Ok, let me help everyone understand what’s going on here.
Newborn was dating a guy long distance who was not returning her texts, so she decided to start seeing other fish, as far as I know she had a date with this guy Monday but I don't remember if it was this past Monday or last week, anyhoo I'm thinking she had sex with this guy and now he's not calling her, which leads me to the conclusion that she has really bad taste in men and becomes emotionally attached too soon.Newborn, having sex with someone does not mean you have a relationship with them, and guys can be very charming when they want to get into your pants, also you can’t be “dating” someone nor can you get “dumped” if you’ve only been out with them once or even twice. And while I’m ranting, let me just put this out there, women and men get over stupid notion of finding the “one”, it will only screw you over. People constantly say they’ve found “the one” only to replace “the one” with a different model in a few years.
Newborn, another poster here, CoolHandLuke once told me that he would not have sex with a woman unless he could see himself having children with her. That has stuck with me for three years and I think he may have been onto something. -
mrsjones5
I agree with Flip...he's just not that into you. A guy, if he really likes you, will call you back even if your first sexual encounter was on the second date and yeah I'm speaking from expericence.
Josie
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purplesofa
Read the book.
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FlyingHighNow
On exceptional occasions, having sex early on will not blow everything. Whether I have experience with any of the things I have commented on, I will leave you to guess. Maybe I do. Maybe I don't. I think in most cases, it's good to err on the side of self control, when you hope to come out of these dates with more than a heartache and a huge question mark. I am not addressing consentual-casual- sex -because- you -just -really -need- to- get- laid. I am talking about the girl who hopes for more, but keeps getting dropped from a guy's call list after she sleeps with him.
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SixofNine
CoolHandLuke once told me that he would not have sex with a woman unless he could see himself having children with her. That has stuck with me for three years and I think he may have been onto something.
LOL. Funniest sentence ever written on this board.
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beksbks
On exceptional occasions, having sex early on will not blow everything.
So, isn't that what we are talking about? Something exceptional? If having sex early on blows everything, it wasn't much to begin with. (I am dying to make a lewd joke here, but I will refrain) If you look at sex as some big special gift you're going to hand over to the ONE, you are going to be disapointed the majority of the time. Sex is fun, period. Now there might be real danger if I guy thinks that's the best sex he's ever had, and schemes to keep you to himself and be prince charming because of it.................
