My theory about the behavior and obsession of some ex-JWs

by Simon 135 Replies latest jw friends

  • hillary_step
    hillary_step

    Gerard,

    The kicked-outs I'm thinking of are those where there were good reasons to kick them out based on the rules in place.

    It seems to me that you are the ignorant one as you actually bolded the wrong section of the sentence and completely and utterly missed the point! Why you should do this evades me. Either you did not understand what was being said, or you chose not to understand, but the meaning is quite clear if you read the sentence with care.

    For your information, I have actually highlighted in red the point that Simon was making.

    HS

  • Sirona
    Sirona

    So someone raised a JW who gets their mind free from JWism is expected to live their life according to the rules of the cult? (because those rules were in place when they got baptised at 15?)

    If they choose to now live their life based upon their own newly developed conscience, they have to suffer the consequences of the cult because they were raised in it?

    This leaves no room for someone growing out of the cult control. Not everyone who frees their mind is able to walk away without a DF.

    Sirona

  • Rabbit
    Rabbit

    Criminals are a totally separate issue, IMO. I would have and still do not want dangerous people around me or my family. I think any organization, including the WT, should have that right & obligation to protect their people.

    But, when churches from Catholic to JW's hide any kind of dangerous criminal activity, for whatever reason, they cross the human decency line. The very thought of pedophiles, rapists, murderers, thieves, etc., being able to have their sins absolved or handled in secrecy in carpeted KH libraries by a tribunal of elder 'judges' or in darkened Catholic confessionals -- makes my blood boil.

    My own theory about psychopathic, anti-social, aggressive, mean-spirited, sociopath Ex-Jehovah's Witnesses...?
    1. They were already that way when they were "...singing Kingdom Melodies besides us in the KH."
    2. Like a bottle of beer, being DF'd, {{{shook}}} them up so badly -- their WT cork *popped* off, no longer holding them back from any control -- spewing uncontrollably.
    3. I think normal people can be 'pushed over the edge' by the shunning effect, whether DF, DA, MIA, weak or fading. I lost my JW mom to the blood issue, my marriage, adult children, grand kids & JW relatives -- all because I'm "spiritually dangerous" and according to 2 elders, I, "Look guilty, because you don't go to meetings!" That has been the most difficult thing I've gone through in my life.

    Luckily, something (?)...like genetics, mental fortitude, having people that love me and receiving my love back and even finding a place like JWD to vent -- has protected me from the triggered mental illnesses I've seen in a few others. They strike back at everyone wildly & blindly...never realizing how sick they are. Professional help is what they need.

    Rabbit

  • Bendrr
    Bendrr
    The kicked-outs I'm thinking of are those where there were good reasons to kick them out based on the rules in place. So, it could be because of drugs, morality issues or whatever. Basically, they didn't measure up to the standards in place for the group they wanted to belong to and were given the boot.

    Pretty controversial statement, considering it could be taken to support the decision made by judicial committees to disfellowship people who are our fellow ex-JW's and friends.

    For the last eight years, we've had countless discussions of the rules in place in the JW's and the enforcement of those rules. The consensus is, unless I've missed new light in my absence, that the rules are harsh and enforced in a cultish manner by kangaroo courts presided over by imperfect and often very biased men who render sentence based less on the "sin" itself than the amount of repentance shown, something left entirely up to their own opinion.

  • hillary_step
    hillary_step

    Bendrr,

    Pretty controversial statement, considering it could be taken to support the decision made by judicial committees to disfellowship people who are our fellow ex-JW's and friends.

    How so?

    HS

  • Simon
    Simon

    So someone raised a JW who gets their mind free from JWism is expected to live their life according to the rules of the cult? (because those rules were in place when they got baptised at 15?)

    If they choose to now live their life based upon their own newly developed conscience, they have to suffer the consequences of the cult because they were raised in it?

    This leaves no room for someone growing out of the cult control. Not everyone who frees their mind is able to walk away without a DF.

    No, you KNOW that is not what I'm saying. Jeez Sirona, you are so aggrevating to discuss things with. You came out with something, I proved (I think) that is isn't something you really believe or support as you first claimed and now you change tack again.

    Someone as you describe should be allowed to leave THAT is what an abuse of the DA / DF system is. This is not what I am talking about though AS YOU WELL KNOW.

    Most people don't have any problem with an organisation having certain moral standards. Employers have it - most companies wouldn't tollerate drug takers and typically have some dress code that people adhere to and would dismiss someone convicted of certain offenses.

  • Simon
    Simon
    considering it could be taken to support the decision made by judicial committees to disfellowship people who are our fellow ex-JW's and friends.

    Exactly. Given that many on here have campaigned for exactly that !

    My point is that just because someone is an ex-JW does NOT make them a friend or a nice person or whatever. Some are, some are nice, some are DFd for unfair reasons and are not to blame.

    But SOME are. Some are DFd because they did things wrong and knowingly broke the rules simply because they couldn't or wouldn't keep to them and not for some 'noble' reason or disagreeing with the org as such.

  • Bendrr
    Bendrr

    Simple, Hillary.

    I see you highlighted the word 'could', which of course the whole statement hinges on.

    I've already made two posts in this thread about how disfellowshipping is the punishment given for lack of repentance, and it is really more for a lack of repentance than for the "sin" itself.

    So on an ex-JW forum, to make such a statement that some deserved to be disfellowshipped, that is going to generate some controversy. It isn't Simon's entire post, which I took for what he said it was, just the one small portion we have all been discussing. I'm not arguing with him or you; he himself said it was a sweeping generalization and a theory, just joining in with my own opinion for whatever it is worth.

  • Bendrr
    Bendrr
    My point is that just because someone is an ex-JW does NOT make them a friend or a nice person or whatever.

    Sad but true.

  • FreudianSlip
    FreudianSlip
    Some are DFd because they did things wrong and knowingly broke the rules

    Guilty here! I was born in and baptized as a child and knowingly broke the rules. I was a typical, horny teenager. I could never be convinced that born-ins like myself deserve what we got for wanting a normal existence.

    (I haven't read the entire thread, so maybe this has been addressed )

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