My theory about the behavior and obsession of some ex-JWs

by Simon 135 Replies latest jw friends

  • Gregor
    Gregor

    I have mentioned these two classes of X's in past posts. I have been on JC's that kicked out some of the dregs of humanity. Unfortunately, I was also involved in DF'ing some people who were simply imperfect, but decent, people. Ironically, I was never involved with any cases of so called apostasy.

    While being into JWD the last couple of years I have always kept an imaginary picture of a couple of types of JW's that I hoped were lurking.

    One, those still involved but with deep concerns that something was not right with the "Truth" and had no way to explore these feelings without risking their personal lives. Some of these have been emboldened to DA themselves or simply fade.

    The other is the witnesses who may have been DF'd for a moral infraction or possible just couldn't cut the JW regimen and have been living under a black cloud of dread that they were going to be destroyed any day now when the big A came.

    To me, freeing these poor souls is the most valuable service your forum has provided. It would be good for it to continue, but, as you have already noted, the forums effectiveness has been dulled to a degree by the swarming of some unsavory types who think that leaving JW's was the equivalent of abandoning all decency and restraint.

  • JeffT
    JeffT

    I agree. My wife and I left in 1988-1989 after spending about a year of that time doing our own research. Both of us joined up as adults, and left when we decided we wern't in the right place. Wife does not define herself as an x-jw and is only rarely interested in jw related issues.

    I come to these forums because it is an interest of mine, I'm doing some writing about it, and I hope to help others do the kind of research I did. I don't have much emotion tied up with it. I'm not mad at the elders, the GB, the society, or those that want to be witnesses.

    I think this is due to the fact that I had the issues all nailed down in my own head before I left. Those that have been kicked out are likely to be left with a lot of baggage that they don't know how to deal with.

  • Homerovah the Almighty
    Homerovah the Almighty

    I'd have to agree with you Simon , there are definite character traits that seem to follow themselves into the walk outs verse the kicked outs,

    some as your aware are those folks that weren't lined up correctly with the proper JW sexual identity.

    These people and others as well carry on with such a vindictive obsession against the JWS and people who have been connected with the religion,

    do so with very little empathy and concern with those that have been involved.

    Some thread topics that were started recently are direct proof of that .

    When I joined the forum awhile back I knew before hand there would be individuals that were going to blindly swing a bat at others, being what human psychology is.

    You and your moderators have done a pretty good job of pulling the rains on these people and that was good for the forum.

    The emotional unbalance of people who willingly walked out on their own or who were kicked out has to be taken in account when developing a forum such as this.

    I really wish you would keep this forum going though Simon its helped many peoples lives for the better and has the potential to help many more in the future.

  • free2think
    free2think

    Interesting theory.

    I do believe there is a difference in my limited exp

    What i have found is that those i know that have been kicked out live their lives thinking it really is the truth, and are in a sort of limbo, feeling that they are bad but knowing they can't live up to the standards set by the wts. And when i have tried to explain that its all rubbish they will defend it till they are blue in the face, so i give up.

    Whereas those that leave, know it isnt the truth, so can get on with their lives without it hanging over their heads.

    That's my take on it.

  • cluless
    cluless

    No one can measure up to the standards set by the society unless they let the society become their mother their father and their wife.

    When you leave the society for whatever reasons it is only natural to search for acceptance in some place or in some shape or form. You leave and you are looking for somewhere to belong. I think if you leave because you are living life in the fast lane its harder to find such a place.

  • Octarine Prince
    Octarine Prince

    Now, I do agree that if you want to eradicate the evil of the JW organization, do it, and be at the business wholeheartedly.

    Direct that negative energy into a sword.

  • DJK
    DJK

    Simon;

    I agree with what you have said, although I don't think it covers it entirely. I think there is a third group of ex-JWs still unidentified and undefined by most. I just can't put my finger on it, yet.

    DJK

  • magoo
    magoo

    in actuality....you are all wrong in your acessments of peoples motives for how they act. anyone who has left "jehovah's one & ONLY TRUE RELIGION on earth" is just a wicked apostate being led by an evil, sex crazed devil, satan himself.............so there, wasn't that easy ?

    magoo

  • Finally-Free
    Finally-Free

    Many of us who walked away from the JWs had the opportunity to have "our say" before we left - the chance to get a few things off of our chests. Those who were booted may not have had that chance, so some unresolved issues may remain. That can eat a person up.

    W

  • Simon
    Simon

    The other aspect I see is that some of the kick-outs are bitter and resentful against the WTS that kicked them out for their behaviour (I'm talking again about those whos behavior warranted it).

    When they subsequently misbehave on discussion forum like this one (which their anger and obsession probably makes more likely) then they simply transfer their resentment and anger to whoever is responsible and possibly the ex-JW community as a whole (or those who frown on the unwanted behavior).

    I'm sure we can all think of examples of these types (well, I can anyway!)

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