How do you know if you're in love?

by LouBelle 42 Replies latest jw friends

  • LouBelle
    LouBelle

    To be honest - I've never loved anyone - I'm talking about the romatic type here. I have liked & been attracted to people....but love, nope. I have no idea how to identify it.

    Looking at people in "so called" love today can be a bit deceptive, as what I have seen and still see to a great extent is 2 people

    - changing who they are to suit what the other wants

    - playing mind games

    - just stuck in a habit of being with someone for the sake of it

    - looking to someone else to complete them

    - asking a partner to prove their love by some or other action.

    Now I'm not prepared to do any other the above. Many people have said they were in love only to fall out of love or realise they weren't in love in the first place. Can love be identified? How?

  • str8?so is spaghetti..until you heat it up
    str8?so is spaghetti..until you heat it up

    All I know is when I am with Chadwick, it feels like I am Home.

    My mind stops racing.

    I feel at peace.

    Ps - I know I love you Loubelle!

  • digderidoo
    digderidoo

    Looking at people in "so called" love today can be a bit deceptive, as what I have seen and still see to a great extent is 2 people

    - changing who they are to suit what the other wants

    - playing mind games

    - just stuck in a habit of being with someone for the sake of it

    - looking to someone else to complete them

    - asking a partner to prove their love by some or other action.

    Now I'm not prepared to do any other the above.

    Any one who acts on those ways may not be in love. The misconception many have of love in my view is that it will last forever. It does in some cases but in my experience it is possible to fall out of love too. Maybe those who act like above have fallen out of love.

    When you love someone you just know it. But then you have to work on it if you want to keep it. If you don't then eventually you will fall out of love.

    That's just my opinion anyway.

    Paul

  • Mary
    Mary
    Looking at people in "so called" love today can be a bit deceptive, as what I have seen and still see to a great extent is 2 people

    - changing who they are to suit what the other wants

    That can only work to a certain extent and is not necessarily a bad thing. If you marry someone and they're irresponsible to start with, there's nothing wrong with them trying to change for the better as it would probably make their relationship better.

    - playing mind games

    If you do that, it's not real love.....That's for teenagers, not for adults.

    - just stuck in a habit of being with someone for the sake of it

    I know plenty of people who do this. They stay in lousy relationships because they figure being with someone----even if they're irresponsible, violent or controlling, is better than being by themselves. Basically, they take the path of least resistance and sell themselves short.

    - looking to someone else to complete them

    This isn't necessarily a bad thing......As humans, it's only natural to want to be with someone and to share your life with them.....If and when you meet the right person, they can indeed "complete you" in the sense of making your life richer and more fulfilling.

    - asking a partner to prove their love by some or other action.

    If your partner truly loves you, you shouldn't have to ask them to "prove their love"-----they should know what you like and they should act on it. If you're constantly having to ask your partner to prove their love, then maybe you shouldn't be with them.

    How do you know when you're in love? You just know.

  • coolhandluke
    coolhandluke

    it is in my nature to seek out chaos. i love violence. i like to hurt people. i would like to watch the world burn and hear its screams knowing that im the one that poured the gasoline and lit the match. the idea of it makes me smile. this is my shadow self.

    i love people. i love to make them smile. internal peace exported externally is my constant goal. if i can find and champion a cause that i believe in, the day is better. this is my sunny self.

    i am in love. funny, the voices from my shadow self are there but calm, docile. i feel them but they dont matter so much and their adgendas don't have any weight in the real of my hands or the imagined world of my thoughts. nothing seems impossible and at the end of the day i feel an inner satisfaction with myself. im not saying that being in love brought these things but the peace from it helped me to see them much easier. the goals that i'd set for myself that seemed unreachable seem like only a matter of time now. the parts of me that dwelled in the shadows find no need to exist there anymore. home is where she is and im content. i expect so much more of myself and i seek out ways to manifest the man that i am inside. the idea of children isn't far off from me but seems like an eventuality instead of a curse or some unimaginable pressure. i think i've loved women before but it was for a reason... to get something to fill some void or to shore up some insecurity about myself, to mask something that i hated about me. now i know that i love this woman for no other reason than that i don't know how not to.

  • str8?so is spaghetti..until you heat it up
    str8?so is spaghetti..until you heat it up

    *swoons*

    CHL

    *sigh*

    You know where to find me when you're ready to switch teams...

  • Mary
    Mary
    CHL said: it is in my nature to seek out chaos. i love violence. i like to hurt people. i would like to watch the world burn and hear its screams knowing that im the one that poured the gasoline and lit the match. the idea of it makes me smile. this is my shadow self.
    See what I mean man. Chicks dig that sort of thing

    Not bloody likely. Anyone who admits that they "like to hurt people" or would enjoy watching "the world burn and hear its screams" is just sick. I would suggest you seek professional help asap.

  • coolhandluke
    coolhandluke

    i dont want to derail this thread. i'll make another one to discuss this... i dont need professional help. in all honesty i'm one of the healthiest people i know mentally. recognizing dark impulses is important. we all have them.

    here ya go:

    http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/15/162608/1.ashx

  • sweetstuff
    sweetstuff

    I think you know you are in love when no matter what a person does, you still love them. Even if you can't live with them, you still love that person. Alot of people seem to think that romantic love should be unconditional, which is completely unrealistic. We all have conditions on romantic love, otherwise we'd not be loving ourselves.

    I like this quote, "Love isn't finding the perfect person, it's seeing an imperfect one, perfectly."

  • Priest73
    Priest73

    I was in love once.

    And I still remember that first beer.

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