What Its Like To Be A Gay Ex JW....

by str8?so is spaghetti..until you heat it up 119 Replies latest jw experiences

  • digderidoo

    Str8 If you stick around long enough you will find real one pops up from time to time to try and correct our ways. He's a bit like a bad smell, comes and goes but after a while you get used to it.


  • str8?so is spaghetti..until you heat it up
    str8?so is spaghetti..until you heat it up

    Thankyou, realone, for sharing your opinion. I appreciate that everyone is entitled to one. I do not agree, but respect your right to an opinion.

    Much love to everyone who has been so kind when reading my story.

    I am determined to live a life free of judgement now, as I believe I have been gifted a life that is beautiful and bright. I do NOT believe I am a sinner - or that anyone is. How unkind it is to believe that each of us is unworthy and inherently bad. There is no love or joy in that.

    Sin, as a social construct, is used to enslave society. Break free of those chains, and simply take responsibility for you actions. As long as your way of life shows respect for other's boundaries, feel free to live it to the full.

    Again, much love to you all, you warm my heart with your acceptance.

  • BFD

    You are going to be an asset to this board, spaghetti man.

    I think I can learn a lot from you.


  • Thechickennest

    I really appreciate your honesty. JW's and JW family members have whole different value systems from the norm, the borgs value system....however, I think your mom will be there for you when you need her. She needs you too. Welcome.

  • nomoreguilt

    Welcome Str8 ! Yours is an exellant read. I can see by your style that you hold nothing back from your life. You are honest with yourself and with those that you loved. I appreciate that in a person. Everyone of us here at JWD have a story to tell. Some of us do tell it and some of us don't. Only when you have come to terms with your own life can you truly be happy. The alternatives to being honest with yourself or another person can have tagic consequences. I am happy to see you with us.

    Many others have posted similar events in their lives to yours, some here at JWD are still living a LIE, I pity them. Retched, miserable people that can only blame others for their lot in life. They think that they are invisible to others, but they are actually quite transparent. You are a GEM amongst pebbles in your dealing with the wts and with your family. I hope all goes well for you in the future as regards your folks.

    My wife has a nephew, he's 24, 25 something. He is gay. A very nice young man, he presents himself well, is very respectful of the feelings of his family and is monogomous, celibate I believe. From what my wife, not a jw, has told me about him, his life as a child and teenager was horrific in his own mind. he always KNEW that he was differant and tried his damndest to not be. He made many attempts to date girls but he never felt comfortable in these relationships. My wife ALWAYS knew that he was gay, even as a child she knew that this was his make-up. I enjoy his company when he visits, as I am NO LONGER judgemental of any man , contrary to how the wts would FORCE us to be.

    Hang in here with us, you'll learn alot here. Don't mind the minority of biggots here or the SELF RIGHTEOUS REALONE. Some folks still have an agenda to perpetuate and refuse to get the drift that they aren't appreciated here. Loving kindness goes a long way.

    Take care Str8


  • real one
    real one

    Str8 If you stick around long enough you will find real one pops up from time to time to try and correct our ways. He's a bit like a bad smell, comes and goes but after a while you get used to it.


    yeah i Know truth hurts

  • BFD


    Carry on.


  • BenV

    Hey, Spaghetti-Man,

    I'm so glad you posted this -- and I wish I had read it sooner. (And aren't there some nice people on this site. )

    I would love to hear more about your story and journey.(Mine's been pretty rocky as of late.) Be sure and let us know when your book is published!

    Ben (done)

  • Galileo

    Allow me to add my voice to the chorus. Welcome. You have clearly made a difficult choice. I love the image of you tacking your DA letter on the information board, like Martin Luther nailing his treatise to the door of the church. The hatred of homosexuals in the WTS, and in the bible in general, was something I had a hard time with when I was a believer. I always imagined trying to make the choice to be gay, and I couldn't imagine under what circumstance I could do it. I then tried to imagine if the converse was true, if there were those for whom making the choice to be heterosexual was equally difficult.

    I have known several gay Witnesses, and it was as plain as the nose on their faces. One in particular I was good friends with since we were both around fourteen. Everyone made jokes about him being gay. When he got older, he bought a Miata and went into the fashion industry. It wasn't long after that that he was disfellowshipped for homosexuality. He is now reinstated and "happily" married to an obese woman. I feel very sorry for him.

    Another man I knew personally, although he was much older, actually had his experience recorded in the Awake magazine ("Something Worse Than Aids" 4/22, 1989). When I knew him it was after the events of that magazine, yet he was clearly gay. Thankfully, before he finally succumbed to the disease, he at last told the Elders that he "was gay and theirs nothing he can do about it". I don't know how his final months were, but I hope he found happiness in not having to pretend anymore.

    Congratulations on finding the courage to break free. I wish you well and look forward to your future posts.

  • aligot ripounsous
    aligot ripounsous

    Hei, Str8, welcome to the board. You will indeed need support in the new life style you have chosen which, you say, is more conform to your natural leaning. As far as I can observe around me, homosexuality is anything but gay and experiences, though reportedly many, don't look so wonderful. If they were, how come that so many gay men can be spotted right away just from the way they look at people, having that sort of mixture of fearful and defying eyes, which exudes loneliness more than gayty. Just in the French recent history, two ageing homosexual literary men, MONTHERLANT and Jean-Louis BORY could see no other way than suicide to face the fact that they were not anymore the handsome physically attractive youg men they had once been. Now as far as judgement is concerned, I'm afraid you have broken free of the JW's just to find it in the common non JWs'. You can do nothing against that, many people just don't understand why there should be a gay PRIDE. Good luck on your uncomfortable road.

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