I haven't read the previous replies. I will say that your wife cannot possibly understand your feelings. If I were in her shoes, knowing what I know now, I would want you to stand your ground. And you could be encouraging her to cry in response to her feelings of sadness, in the future, over the changes. And if you she knows the tears will affect you, she might not be moved to try to grow stronger.
Changes in life are inevitable. They aren't always easy. There are often growing pains with change and then hopefully some growth rwill be a result. I know that no matter how much someone would cry for me to attend meetings, I could not go again. My sister has cried over me not attending. I will not be influenced by her tears. I can offer comfort. But my feelings count, too.
Be loving to her. Be supportive in other ways. But if it's really important to you not to attend meetings. You want to make a clean break? Why let these local JW's get to know you? Don't let them invest any feeling or time or worry in you. Just be that inactive husband that they rarley see. Then you can attend get togethers with her or an occasional convention, etc. and people will be encouraged to see you. But if you start going and then fade, they will think worse of you.