God dammit!!! I hate this cult!

by bluesbreaker59 67 Replies latest jw friends

  • marmot
    marmot

    Sucks a big one but just concentrate on making it YOUR happiest day and not giving a crap about what your deluded dad thinks. After all, maybe one day he'll regret it and apologize.

    In the meantime I can see how it hurts, one of my (former) best friends didn't invite his father to his wedding because his dad is DF'd for apostasy.

  • R.Crusoe
    R.Crusoe

    My life became demoralised - for different reasons - over how I relied on others to see 'All my goodwill!' and to share it with me!

    It can pain you badly!

    So long as you have those displaying love and support communicating directly with you and showing it, value them and let them know how you appreciate their being there for you both at such a life enhancing moment!

    Do not!! Do not let your essence dwell on any negatives! Ride all the positives for that is where your future pathway lies! That is where you will travel so long as you keep to it!

    I see your pain - but do not make others your challenge - their choice is their choice and if WRONG allow them the mistake and do your thing.

    Watch that show I mention = some stuff that blew my mind into a bubble.

  • Hortensia
    Hortensia

    I'm sorry - try not to let it cloud your day. My mother came to my wedding, well, sort of. She stood outside the church and watched through the window. Wierd, eh?

  • potleg
    potleg

    What a crock, that's mind control or you, parents turn their backs because the Organization tells them to. I guess you know where you stand. Glad to hear your sweet lady is supportive.

    Try to focus on all the great things coming up and all the real friends you have to enjoy them with. Your dad really is the bigest loser here.

    As far as telling friends why he's not attending, maybe give a simple reverse witness like "his screwed up religion won't let him come"

  • Sirona
    Sirona

    I'm sorry to hear this is happening to you.

    HUGS to you and your fiancee, I hope you have a great day no matter what.

    I would suggest writing a letter maybe (to your father) to explain how you feel about his flippant comment about such an important event for you...

    Sirona

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    It's not your job to make excuses for your father. I think it is fitting that your father's friends and acquaintances get to see the consequences of shunning up close and personal. Why not make up a small card you can give people who ask, stating simply, "I invited dad, he chose not to come and this is why. You'll have to ask him if it bothers you."

    "shunning...putting loyalty to their righteous God before family affection could be lifesaving for them" www.watchtower.org

  • lisavegas420
    lisavegas420

    My dad didn't give me away either. At none of my weddings...Neither parent ever attended any of my weddings.

    I guess I'll stop inviting them. ...Or getting remarried.

    Enjoy your special day.

    lisa

  • Open mind
    Open mind

    loosie:

    When he explains that he didn't attend because your are of different religions. they will laugh.

    If he's a JW who knows even the first thing about "Theocratic Warfare" (lying, diverting attention, skirting the issue, etc.) he will likely say something along these lines:

    "It was a VERY difficult thing for me not to attend my son's wedding, but it's personal and I'd rather not get into the details. Be assured that I love my son VERY much and that I wish the best for him. blah, blah, blah."

    Sad thing is, he will actually believe those words and deliver them in a very sincere manner.

    Co-workers won't get the real reason from the Dad, IMO.

    OM

  • bluesbreaker59
    bluesbreaker59

    See what really sucks, is I've already been married once, a forced DUB marriage, when I was 18, and that day was ruined because my mom couldn't be at the reception, and I had to answer a bunch of retarted questions. Five years later, I divorced this woman, because we couldn't get along at all and she was cheating on me. So now 3 years of finding myself and healing later, I found the absolute woman of my dreams, and now my father won't be supportive. I know I can't change it, and out of respect for my future fiancee, I will not go to a Dr. Laura or Miss Manners or other national media center, because I don't want our wedding day to be a 3 ring circus. I just want to get married and live "happily ever after", that's all I want.

  • Cc81
    Cc81

    i am so sorry you have to deal with this. i know EXACTLY how u feel and what you are going through. I got married last july. And my dad and my sisters did not attend. It hurt like hell. I did however, send them invitations. It can never be said i did not try... again i am sorry you are going through all of this.

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