How Would You Handle Your Daughter Dating A Different Ethnic Person?

by minimus 29 Replies latest jw friends

  • skeeter1
    skeeter1

    Dating, nothing.

    Getting serious....well...then, I'd have a big party. Invite his family & our family to a great big dinner. We'd get to know each other over food/wine/beer from our ethnic heritages. In short, I'd PARTY.

    And, 20 is not "too young" if you are dating the right person for you.

    Skeeter

  • nvrgnbk
    nvrgnbk

    Dating, nothing.

    Getting serious....well...then, I'd have a big party. Invite his family & our family to a great big dinner. We'd get to know each other over food/wine/beer from our ethnic heritages. In short, I'd PARTY.

    And, 20 is not "too young" if you are dating the right person for you.

    Skeeter

    Ditto.

    Perfect, skeeter!

  • IP_SEC
    IP_SEC

    Any comments???

    nope

  • 4digitcode
    4digitcode

    what IP_SEC said.
    race seems to be a popular subject lately on the threads.

  • mrsjones5
    mrsjones5

    When my daughter dates and tells me about her new beau, the first question out of my mouth will not be "Is he black?" I won't care what color or race he is, only that he treats my daughter with respect and likes/loves her for who she is.

    Josie

  • Gopher
    Gopher

    It isn't 1967 any more, we've moved past the era of "Guess Who's Coming to Dinner", the Tracy / Hepburn / Poitier movie about a young interracial couple and the impact their relationship had. (I loved that movie!) The idea isn't so radical any more, and hasn't been for quite a while.

    I have been married outside my ethnicity, and know sometimes differences in background take a while to understand.

    If my daughter dated someone ethnically diverse from her, I would hope it isn't JUST because of the diversity but because of who he is.

  • Tyrone van leyen
    Tyrone van leyen

    For me it all comes back to whether you are nice or nasty. I don't give a God dam flat ---k what colour you are, or even what you beleive. A man that treats me or (my daughter) if I had one, with respect and is a decent person is welcome in my home and will be treated with all due respect as a human being with no compunction or issues at all. For folks of a darker shade, who have my respect, they will be seen as a human being with goodness who has dark skin. Who cares about the colour?

    When I left the witnesses 20 years ago, it was a black family from Jamaica that looked after me. They protected me and taught me, like I was one of their own. They lived in a project that was rough. They didn't judge me. They were wonderful people! They even loaded up a big van on Sundays and took me to their spiritual sermons. Far different than anything I had ever seen. But they accepted me.

    I recently met, my protector about 6 months ago. He looks like Mr. T and can kick ass. He admitted to me, that he is racist. Probably most towards Muslims. His family integrated into this country and from nothing, became productive and he now owns international Stucco. I am very proud of him actually.

    I recently met one of his buddies, whom I also get along with very well. He gave me a big hug in the shopping centre and even bought some of my groceries for me, as a gesture of kindness. There was a black Muslim man, that saw us getting along like we were inseperable, and gave us a look of suprize like that shouldn't be happening. He was clearly staring at us. I know why these freinds of mine don't like muslims. I can't blame them really. (They) my Jamaican freinds, have tried to integrate and be loving people, while many Muslims don't seem open to the possibility of being a part of the fabric of society to which they have been so generously accepted in.

    I dare not make the mistake of speaking for all Muslims. I know someone is just waiting for me to say the wrong words to pounce on me for racism, but sorry to disappoint. My dad is renting an appartment to an Iraqi, who is the most decent, kindest wonderful person I have ever met, so be very careful, if you chose to pounce. I can pounce too. Very well, in fact.

    So let me make a very clear statement. Anyone of colour, Muslims included, is welcome to my home and will be treated with decency respect and love. I do not see colour. I have dated many black women in fact. If you act like a friggin asshole, or a jerk is when I will call you a nigger, or something derogatory. It has nothing to do with skin colour. I might use something like this, because it is heavily insulting to those who have no respect. I would never ever, call my black freinds that. I have a great deal of respect for them. They know exactly what I mean too. I am so glad I met these people.

  • sweetstuff
    sweetstuff
    I can pounce too. Very well, in fact.

    Ok, I am going to behave and leave that one well alone.

  • Sunspot
    Sunspot

    When I first became a JW and lived in a big city, I got to meet several inter-racial couples in the Kingdom Hall, blends of black, Eurasian, Phillipino, and mixtures of many more. ALL their kids were breathtakingly beautiful and I used to URGE my five kids to marry ones of different races if THIS is what my grandchildren would look like, haha. But I am being serious here...I really DID hope they would find mates that were a different culture and race. (Nobody did)

    I cannot very well offer any advice on the actual question you asked, Min.....I would have to know more about those involved to make any kind of statement on this.

    hugs,

    Annie

  • worldtraveller
    worldtraveller

    My daughter is NOT going to marry a sponge. That is all!

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