As one of the few people who did not take offense to Bgurl’s comments, I would like to thank her for posting it, for I found it to be insightful. However, I can definitely see how some could take it the wrong way, since you didn’t do a great job of showing empathy and took more of a “tough love” approach. Such an approach doesn’t bother me personally, but I probably would not of written your post exactly that way (though I definitely I’m not taking away from your message Bgurl, please post again. But next time it would probably be wise to take into consideration how your words come across to others. I tell you this because I myself have a habit of being very blunt and have drawn similar reaction for seemingly benign comments).
Even though I am a life long JW, I have a grand total of 2 JW’s in my very close inner circle of friends. Fortunately for me, my parents have allowed me to have non-JW friends as long as they weren’t borderline criminal. My suggestion is to go up to people who you know you’ll be around a lot (e.g. work mates or class mates) and say hi and develop an issue you both can relate to (I know for guys sports is a great topic). Over time, in the course of your shallow conversations digress to deeper issues, such as religion, family, ethics. If you click with the person the connection will be obvious. If you’re a shy person it may take some guts to start up a conversation (it’s a real boon if the other party does it for you) but once you get “the ball rolling” on a topic the two of you share a liking in, it’s quite easy to transition to topics that are of consequence and that make friendships more than just a “hi, how are you” affair. And make an effort to be with the person in a relaxed social setting such as a party (I have a preference for bowling) as a more formal setting might induce you to only talk of work or school. All the friends I have made have been a result of me following a pattern that somewhat mirrors what I have written above. If you’re in college like me, joining a group on campus can help. My suggestions may not be right for everyone, but maybe it can help someone.