Has anyone gotten a restraining order on elders??

by mzliz 34 Replies latest jw friends

  • MinisterAmos
    MinisterAmos

    They are passed out like JW tracts to people who "feel uncomfortable" by repeated unwelcome advances.

    No life threatening is necessary; diminishing life's quality is.

  • Stephanus
    Stephanus

    There used to be people on here who knew the correct procedure for this sort of thing. Usually a lawyers letter demanding that all further contact be through your lawyer, also threatening the elders that any further harrassment will not be tolerated and that ANY announcement made about you in your absence will be treated as defamatory and redressable in a court of law.

    The lawfirm that deals with the Silentlambs cases probably have that kind of letter down pat...

  • jayhawk1
    jayhawk1

    My NO TRESSPASSING sign works quite effectively. It is on my front door where nobody can miss it. It also says DAY SLEEPER and NO SOLICITATIONS. Get a caller ID and, if necessary, let your answering machine take your calls. Be sure to let close ones know you will be screening your calls with the answering machine and to just announce who they are before you pick up.

    The cost of a NO TRESPASSING sign and extra letters to add whatever else you need to say will run you under 10 dollars. Money well spent!

  • rebel8
    rebel8

    Here restraining orders are free--it is a judge's order based upon a crime reported to the police which is credible. You have to prove that you have notified them not to contact you and they still persist, and that you're alarmed, annoyed, and/or harassed by their contact. Then you have to call the police who must believe you enough to file a report and take it to the judge with a request for a restraining order.

    The subject is served with a copy of the order and if he violates it he will be arrested if you report it and there's adequate proof. Response time of the police doesn't matter IMO. If they arrest the elder 2 days after violating it, I don't think that's a big deal. IMHO

    The subject is also accused of a crime. This means he is going to be arraigned etc. & you need to be prepared to testify in court.

    Proof means photos, eye witnesses, phone records, and saving the notes they send. If they are calling, check your phone book to find out how to trace the calls.

    Personally I'd start by sending the entire body of elders a letter demanding that all contact cease immediately and that you will regard any visits as trespassing, sent by certified mail with returned receipt. That will begin the long documentation process. You do not need an attorney to do any of that. A certified/return receipt letter costs around $7.

    You may also have a local crime victims' assistance organization that can answer questions for you.

    (This is all pertaining to where I live.)

    I seriously believe that after receiving your certified letter they will stop contacting you.

    *been there, done that*

  • blondie
    blondie

    I might say that it is better to try using a flyswatter on a fly first rather than start out with a baseball bat.

    Be sure you have made a clear attempt to communicate to these people you do not want them to contact you, by phone, by letter, by e-mail, in person at your work, at home, or in public places. Document it as rebel8 says.

    Keep all communications sent to you regarding this as well, letters, notes, e-mails, etc.

    The legal system wants to know you have tried all the non-legal ways to deal with this.

    I have found that if you are firm and clear and calm in what you say, they will back off. Most are really cowards and when they find they cannot intimidate you, will go on to someone else.

    As rebel 8 says, you have to convince the police and a judge that you truly are dealing with a dangerous situation and are not just using the legal system as a way to get back at someone you don't like.

    Blondie (served many a restraining order) (BTW the $100 was if you seek out an attorney, but it is not required; if you do it on your own there is no charge)

    Here is one state's site on restraining orders:

    http://www.doj.state.wi.us/cvs/Victims_Rights/restraining_orders.asp

    Three kinds: the one that pertains here:

    Harassment: If a person attempts, threatens or does strike, shove, kick or otherwise subject you to physical contact; or repeatedly acts in a harassing or intimidating manner toward you for no legitimate purpose, you may ask for a harassment restraining order. Harassment orders are also obtained by victims of stalking.

    A Two-Step Process

    The person who asks for a restraining order is called a petitioner, because they petition the court to order another person to stay away from them or to stop hurting them. The person being asked to stay away is called the respondent, because they have the right to "respond" to the court as to what is said in the petition.

    Step 1: Temporary Restraining Order (TRO)

    People ask for TROs because they need immediate protection. It is also the first step in obtaining a longer term, "permanent injunction." To obtain a TRO:

    1. Decide which type of restraining order fits your situation.
    2. Fill out forms asking for protection, giving specific examples of the abuse. Make sure you include the date, time and brief description of every incident that caused you fear or injury.
    3. Take the completed forms to a county judge or court commissioner. The office where you obtained the forms can tell you where they should be returned.
    4. When you turn in the form, you will go before a court official who will conduct a temporary restraining order hearing. You will be asked about the alleged abuse or why you need a restraining order.
    5. The judge or court commissioner may issue a restraining order for up to seven days. If a temporary restraining order (TRO) is granted, it goes into effect immediately after the abuser is officially served with the paperwork instructing him/her to stay away from you. A date for the next hearing is set; the purpose of the next hearing is to change your temporary restraining order (TOR) into a permanent injunction that can be enforced for up to two years.
    6. A law enforcement agency will serve the TRO on the respondent. This means your abuser is informed of the fact that you have obtained a TRO, of the type of abuse you say happened, and the date and time of the next court hearing. In the TRO, the respondent is officially notified to stay away from you "temporarily," and that they can be arrested for violating the TRO. You can also hire a private process server if you feel the respondent could be more effectively located and served by someone who is not a uniformed officer.
    7. Obtain written proof or "affidavit of service" from law enforcement that the TRO was served, because the court will ask for that proof at the Injunction Hearing.

    Step 2: The Injunction Hearing

    1. You must appear in court to turn the restraining order from a Temporary Restraining Order into a Final Injunction that can protect you for up to two years. (The time and place for this hearing was set during the TRO hearing.)
    2. The court official will allow you and the respondent to testify. It is important to bring information such as police or medical reports that back up your petition. You may only be allowed to discuss incidents you outlined in the TRO petition, so be sure whenever you fill out forms to do so completely. You may be able to have witnesses testify on your behalf.
    3. If the court finds that the abuse or harassment has occurred or may occur, he or she will issue a Final Injunction for the period of time that you request. You can ask that an injunction be in effect for up to two years, and most victims ask for two years.
    4. You may ask the court to set a time for the respondent to collect his or her belongings if you live together. You should ask that a police officer or sheriff be present at that time.
    5. You will be given a copy of the court's order. If the respondent is not at the hearing, the order will be served on him or her by law enforcement.
    Please remember that an injunction alone may not be enough to make the abuse stop. It is only part of a safety plan you will need to develop in order to increase your safety. You do not have to go through this alone—there are people in your community who care and can help.
  • Justice-One
    Justice-One
    No life threatening is necessary; diminishing life's quality is.

    I wish I would have had your Judge. I was being stalked, and even had a witness that swore that she had seen this person peeking in my windows after dark. Of course this law student who gets to grade his own papers (aka Judge) said I should just ignore her and get better blinds.

    And by the way, there is a LOT of truth to the old saying that the a lawyer that represents himself has a fool for a client.

  • mzliz
    mzliz

    Blondie, thanks for all of your help and info.

    I have saved the one note they left. I have 3 witnesses (the good kind) who have heard me ask them to leave me alone on 3 different phone conversations. I have my phone bill showing how they were calling me almost every day. I have caller ID, and recently answered them a few times to tell them to back off.

    My BF told them I would write them a letter and get it certified, seeing how the elder wouldn't take his word for it. They acted like this was news to them. I was very clear in my asking to be left alone! is it just me, but i feel like its because I'm a woman and they don't respect us. They listened to my BF. BELIEVE me, I'm not a soft spoken gal!!

    Sorry Blondie, my approach is the baseball bat. We will see what happens with them after they get this letter, sending it out tomorrow. If they persist they will absolutely see me in court.

  • Finally-Free
    Finally-Free

    I sent the PO a letter instructing them to stop calling me on the phone or trespassing on my property, or I'd call the police and file charges for harassment and trespassing. They never bothered me again as long as I lived at that address. When I moved, for a short time there were strange vehicles parking near my home, watching. I didn't see it myself, but my neighbours told me about it. They provided me with license numbers, and I filed a police report. No more problems.

    W

  • blondie
    blondie

    mzliz (and others), remember that your own actions will be evaluated as well. So stay calm and don't make threats against them. If you feel the need to engage the elders in "discussion" always have another person there as a witness to what was said and done. That is why the elders come in twos, it is a CYA measure. Be polite, don't feel you have to prove yourself right to them (pearls before swine).

    To repeat,

    1) get Caller ID and only take the calls of those you want to talk to; even let it go into the message box first.

    2) you are not obligated to answer the door if you don't want to talk to that person. Note the date, time, and who was there though. You can build up proof of frequency and identity. (I would take a picture of them with the date and time.) Taking down license plates of cars monitoring your house is a good idea and letting the police know. The fact that you are a woman will work in your favor...men stalking a woman.

    3) Keep copies of all unwanted contacts by note, mail, e-mails, etc.

    4) In the short run, just tell them you don't want anyone to contact you unless you call them first and that you will, if necessary, take legal steps to ensure that they do so. Sending a certified (return receipt) letter is another good idea if verbal requests don't work.

    Blondie

  • Abandoned
    Abandoned

    Since the elders have found out about coming child, they are harrassing the hell out of me. I have successfully blown them off for months, but now are coming by my house, (I dont answer) last night at 5 this morning at 10,

    They're not satisfied with prophesying the destruction of millions of babies at armageddon, they want to make sure yours experiences HELL right here on the earth.

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