After 4 years, an introduction (hope it works this time!)

by gwyneth 53 Replies latest jw friends

  • juni
    juni

    Welcome Gwyneth to the forum.

    I'm so happy that you decided to take the "leap" and post your story. A lot of us can relate to your experiences in one way or another.

    I so much look forward to more postings by you. You are very intelligent and fluent. Thank you for taking the time to tell us about your history and sharing your feelings with us.

    Hugs,

    Juni

  • freedomlover
    freedomlover

    wow Gwenyth

    great intro!

    I'm really glad you decided to start posting.

    LOL at the KY thing. When I was a JW I used to buy it as a *special* gift for the new bride to open later at home after her bridal shower. Then I'd tell the groom - (nudge, nudge) "you'll thank me later....."

    I can relate to the bitterness of lost opportunity. I don't really have any advice for that one since I'm still struggling with that myself.

    welcome. freedomlover

  • gwyneth
    gwyneth
    LOL at the KY thing. When I was a JW I used to buy it as a *special* gift for the new bride to open later at home after her bridal shower. Then I'd tell the groom - (nudge, nudge) "you'll thank me later....."

    Wish you'd been in my congregation, Freedomlover! I got silky granny panties and long cotton gowns at my shower.

    I asked my mom why she didn't warn me, and she said, "You read so many books, I figured you'd read everything you needed to know." I said, "Since when have I been allowed to read a book about how to have sex!!!" A worldly friend from school got me, "Our Bodies, Ourselves" after I'd been married about a year. That was an eye opener.

  • freedomlover
    freedomlover

    ****Wish you'd been in my congregation, Freedomlover! I got silky granny panties and long cotton gowns at my shower. ****


    ahhh yes, well ya know - we were "innocent as doves" as jws. LOL!!

  • uninformed
    uninformed

    Gwyneth,

    You wrote:
    The things I learned on this board simply enraged me. I felt betrayed and duped by the WTBTS. Then I became bitter and resentful--that I missed out on my childhood, that I didn’t go to college, that I married too young. Angry about the UN scandal and the child molestation policy and the blood issue. But, the bitterness was far more palatable than thinking that I was worse than dog vomit to God. I am still locked in the bitterness, and I am jealous of the people who have let it go. My mom and sister have both moved on with no looking back. It’s the bitterness that drives me to be an active opposer of JW’s. My mom and sister have no desire to participate, overtly or subtly, in the demise of the WTBTS, and my dad thinks it’s sacrilegious. I live for it.

    I really appreciated your story. I also have the same intense anger at the WT. So many bright people have been cheated of a better life and education by the WT.

    Thanks for your story.

    Brant

  • Wasanelder Once
    Wasanelder Once

    Wow, that was an eye full. At least most everyone that you are close to is out of the Borg .How many others are out there being submissive to an AH like you were? Just amazing. How wonderful your eyes were opened and you took a walk from it. I know there will be others lurking who will benefit greatly from your story. For that, I thank you.

    What of your daughter? Born in 91? She is a teen now, is she indoctrinated somewhat? How is she doing? WIth Granny and Gramps out it must be a little easier to steer her away from the hellhole you left.

    All the best to you in your futher freedom from fear and the men in bad suits.

    W.Once

  • bikerchic
    bikerchic

    Welcome gwyneth!

    Glad you shared.

  • gwyneth
    gwyneth


    Hi Wasanelder,

    My daughter just turned 15.

    She says she vaguely remembers singing and clapping at meetings. (She was used as prop during a C.O.'s visit one year...a talk about little children...he held her up on the platform while speaking--so glad she didn't cry!) The last meeting she went to was about age 3 or 4 (not sure if my ex-husband took her...he is no longer JW either, and only contacts her once a year now.) She has been brought up a total heathen, with no religious instruction whatsoever. It was hard for me to celebrate any of the holidays after I was an Ex-JW; my boyfriend had to take her trick or treating, because I just couldn't do it. Christmas was out of the question. Again, BF took over. (Of course, being an Apostate has changed all that! New attitude completely. Easter? Bring it on!)

    I enrolled her in private school starting in Middle School, and it is affiliated with the Lutheran Church. The application asked what religion we were, how often we attended church, etc, and I left that entire section blank, but they accepted her. It has been wonderful for her. At least she is having some moral guidance (as well as a top-notch education and sports program, and excellent children to hang with.) I don't agree with some of the things they teach, but we discuss them at home, and I try to show her there are other ways of thinking. I get angry when she comes home with information that she learned in Religion (a daily required class) like, gays will burn in hell. She agonizes over her Religion homework, and I try to steer clear of helping her on that one (gives me the heebie jeebies)...She has Chapel Wednesdays, and they use the NIV Bible (sometimes I attend Chapel to hear her sing; she is always amazed that I can find scriptures faster than anyone around us.) They require the children to fill out cards every week to track the days they went to church--my daughter's is always completely blank at the end of the semester, but she doesn't seem to care, so I don't care. Overall, she is having just enough religious training to make her think twice about breaking some moral code, but not enough for her to be a fanatic.

  • fullofdoubtnow
    fullofdoubtnow

    Hi Gwyneth, and welcome

    Thankyou so much for sharing your story, you express yourself so well. I look forward to reading more from you.

    love

    Linda

  • Goldminer
    Goldminer

    Welcome girl!!!

    I enjoyed reading your story and was happy to see that your whole family is out.It's just too bad you had to learn some lessons the hard way and that it had a very negative impact on some parts of your life.Hope you're doing good ...and keep smiling!

    Goldminer

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