How do you handle extremely rude people in public? (page 5)

Amazing1914

I work with the public every day. I can relate. I used to be real polite no matter what. Then, I moved from Oregon to Chicago, and learned how to get in people's faces and be rude right back. Then, I learned how to be polite again. It's tough to know what to say in each situation.

I find that focus on what I am doing, and non-response to rudeness works well. Were I in a similar situation that you were in, I would simply ask the line cutters to please step back as I am helping someone ahead of them. They will need to wait. Every time they blurted out more nonsense, I would keep repeating the request like a broken record, until they moved. If they did not move, I would call security. I would never acknowledge their silly claims, and I would never defend my feelings. I would, however, remain calm, with a low voice, and simply repeat myself.

In my office we do not have security. So, I simply ask rude people to leave, and I have done it. I then walk away from them, back to my office. If I am on the phone, I tell them that they are rude, and I end the conversation, and hang up. I move on without caring one wit. It is not worth my emotional energy to give such people the time of day, much less my own personal hurts.

I learned this after my heart attack.

Jim Whitney

rebel8

I just wanted you to answer a question. Can't you do two things at once?

This is a passive-aggressive (p/a) technique--asking a loaded question. She damn well knows you can do 2 things at once. She was trying to pretend it's a question when it was really a demand.

I've had tons of p/a people in my life & still do, so I've had lots of practicing my favorite technique--answering them concretely.

Q. "Can't you do two things at once?"

A. "Yes I can." Then continue on without pausing or changing my behavior even slightly. If that doesn't shut her up.......

Q. "Well why aren't you then?"

A. "I am. In fact, I'm doing several things. I'm breathing, blinking, trying to wait on the customer whose turn it is, and talking to you. That's 4 things."

Sometimes it throws the p/a person off balance so much they shut up, or they come up with a more direct and polite way to get their needs met.

Shining One

WhyamIhere,
You absolutely RULE!
Rex

jojochan

I disfellowship them.

jojochan.

finis_mundi

I think you handled the situation well and with dignity. Not only were they rude but they were idiots as well. For one thing if they were being helped instead I'm sure they wouldn't want your attention diverted. Second being a nurse doesn't automatically make you a sensitive person.

Panda

Might this be a northern thing? I mean I used to live in a few northern states and rudeness seemed natural for everyone... real get in your face people. Then I moved to Texas and was told in a polite way "them's fightin' words" Ever since I heard that I had to think "ok, is this worth being considered fighting words or do I want to fight over this?" I'll admit that I love scrappin'; only it's usually not worth it ; especially now when I come from a state where people apologise for accidently pushing and then don't do it again... Where people hold doors open for women and old folks ; the recipients of this treatment saying THANK YOU and the giver saying Your Welcome or even better MY PLEASURE.

Wow think of that taking pleasure in providing an open door. Amazing. I've lived and worked in Wisconsin and Illinois so I know rude.

How do you handle extremely rude people in public?