Disfellowshipped and lonely

by ryry 53 Replies latest jw friends

  • damselfly
    Important to remember: You are not alone. You are a person of worth and value who deserves every happiness in the world. Just because they stuck a label on you of "disfellowshipped", means nothing to anyone outside the tiny, isolated world that is the JW 'religion'.

    Take courage. Post here and even more importantly, read, read, and read more. And if the pain gets to be too much, talk to a professional, quickly. Disfellowshipping is a brutal, evil practice that has caused many to give up on life. But life is just beginning for you. Don't ever let that go.

    Fleur/Essie ~ You are my new hero.

    (((ryry))) These are words I wish I had a decade ago. Print this off and read it when you fell down.


  • outnfree

    Well, I can't get any more eloquent than essie, so I will just say, "Welcome, ryry!"

    Pull up a chair and read a while. I think you'll become vastly relieved ... eventually.



  • cyberdyne systems 101
    cyberdyne systems 101

    Just wanted to add a warm welcome!

    It is so hard when you seem to lose everything, but look at what you have gained too - you have become what you want to be, no longer in the shadow of your family, now able to choose what you want to do. What you face is something to replace what you no longer have, you have experienced a grieving as though someone has died to you, but time is a great healer. You have come here no doubt to try and understand whats happened to you. Before long your confidence will grow and you can make a new life with new friends who love you for you - not what they want you to be. It has the possibility of becoming your happiest time because you can find yourself and learn who you are, no longer do you need to nurture the guilt that you do when in the borg.

    Good luck in your new life, make it happen

    CS 101

  • carla

    Welcome! sorry you are going through a rough patch right now. Many here have been in the same situation and can help you through.

  • outnfree

    Oh -- the best thing I did for myself soon after leaving was to enroll in a logic class at the local community college. I highly recommend it.

  • darth frosty
    darth frosty

    Not meaning to sound cold, but the best thing for you to do is move on with your life. First get your money in order. If you are not already on the right track to financial security ( i.e going to college getting your career plans in order) start on that path. 2nd not saying that you can replace your family and former friends in the 'truth'. But what you can do is find new assosiates and work mates that can make the transition easier.

    now as jerry seinfield said there is a point in a mans ( or womans) life where they do not take interviews or applications for new friends. But what you can do is join various groups that share your same interest. For example, lets say you like to play cards like bid whist, black people love bid whist. What you can do is go online or look in your local paper and find the local bid whist clubs. Join one of these clubs and enjoy the association of fellow club members who like bid whist. Whatever your interest are there are those out there who share them and are looking to invite others to join them.

    Now this is key. Due to the JW programing you have recieved during your association with the Org, you may be thinking how can I join in association with the world. The answer is simple as with all things in life. You very carefully choose your associates. Just like when you were in the 'truth' you did not necesarily associate with those deemed 'week' the same holds true in your new endevor. You dont accept just anyone into your confidaence, you make sure they are truly 'real' genuine individuals.

    Good luck to you in your new life (for that is what it truly is) and enjoy the freash air of freedom.

  • Sad emo
    Sad emo

    Hi ryry

    stick around here and talk to us, we listen

  • acadian

    Welcome to the board yryr!

    Just saw your post, wanted to say Hi and Welcome but I gotta go feed the chickens,
    fix the hole in the fence,and round-up the goats, be back later.


  • Balsam

    I think one of the worst things folks do when they get disfellowshipped is isolate themselves from other ex-witnesses. But it is understandable since the Society scares everyone to death calling us all apostates. Welcome here hope you can find answers and encouragement.


  • wombat

    Ryry....You don't have to be related to your true family by blood......

    You have a big loving family here. I reckon you would be overwhelmed if you called for support.

    Uncle Wombat in Australia.

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