You see, I never was. Never fit in. Never cared to. Most witnesses bored me to absolute tears. I was always a straggler. Invisible (and liked it that way). Rarely got invited to get togethers. I truly did not mind, when I was still restricted in my association, this just encouraged me to be an avid reader and daydreamer in my room and at the meetings (also, I draw a lot. I'm an artist--I never would have become so, if I had not been rather "cut" from the herd). As I became more sentient, I became very popular with my school mates ("worldly") and to this day, I have a very easy time making friends and socializing--I can walk up to anybody! I've helped friends run for political office--I'm known for being outgoing and likeable (yes, I have self-confidence! There may be people out there who do not like me, but I'm too busy to notice!).
Sure made fading easier.
To make a short point long: I remember a CO talking about the scripture where the fishermen are pulling in fish and the angels are culling them out, and saying that there are those who are not meant to be witnesses. I knew then and there at age 11, that was me--I felt greatful. This pod of witnesses did not see me as their own because I was not. It was totally mutual.
So, were you a popular witness? Or like me, did you have the feeling that you were a stranger in a strange (very strange) land?
Blessings,
~Brigid