Elder Alert!!!!!

by flag 51 Replies latest jw friends

  • flag

    He did not specifically said to meet with me alone, but he never mention anything about my husband either. He only gave me the time for the visit.

    When he called last night to confirmed the visit I told him that I couldn't do it at the time he wanted but that I could do it one hour later when my husband was at home and he said that he already had something else to do, and said that maybe next week. I told him to call me ahead of time and I will let him know if I have chance because I have a lot of activities with the kids.

  • willyloman

    Flag: Good work on stalling him. There is another possibility at work here, and that is that was directed by the body of elders to connect up with you and see what's going on since you've missed a month or so of meetings. If that's the case, he'd have been directed to work take another brother with him.

    Elders often get such instructions during one of their meetings. The typical elder makes a call or two to the publisher for a meeting. Often, though, after a couple of unsuccessful attempts, the elder will just move on to some other assignment. They get so much crap thrown at them it's easy to let stuff slide.

    So you may be able to sidestep the whole episode if you are unavailable each time he calls. At some point, he'll stop asking and you'll be forgotten for weeks or months. When he's asked about you by the elders at their next meeting, he can always say, "Hey, I made several phone calls, she never got back to me." Then he may be admonished to try one more time, so you may get one more phone call. There is a huge "out of sight, out of mind" thing that goes on with JWs, elders included. Most of them don't really want to be bothered with your personal problems. It would be easy for these guys to pigeon-hole you into the "spiritually weak" category, especially if your husband and kids stopped going to meetings years ago. They've probably been expecting you to be next and they're just going through the motions of caring because they were told to.

    Another tactic: If you have caller i.d., screen your calls. And don't bother to listen to his messages. Spouses and kids have been known to erase messages; those machines are tricky, you know.

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