Being sexually virtuous, useful or a waste of time?

by greendawn 26 Replies latest jw friends

  • mrsjones5

    Are you talking about being virtuous or frigid?

  • steve2
    that said, i know there are lots of dirty religious people, and virtuous atheists. so, not sure where you are going with it.

    ts, you sure said it for me! It seems whenever questions of morality arise, sooner or later someone dredges up the "If you believe in God, 'Yes', but if you don't then, 'No'" line of argmuent, as Stilla did in the earlier post.

    Virtue may be more predictable - and even understandable - among people who shiver at the thought of godly vengeance. But I so much more admire virtue when its eye is on not the consequences of its absence but on its heartfelt and respectful contribution to human relationships.

  • steve2
    Are you talking about being virtuous or frigid?


  • Apostate Kate
    Apostate Kate

    One would have to decide on a certain set of virtuous standards to begin with.

    Biblical standards are one set.

    My experience with being sexualy biblicaly virtuous is this; when I lived my life outside the boundaries set in the Bible, it was a compromise and my life was not going in the direction I wanted it to. I suffered. Made wrong choices. Made bad choices. Lost the respect of my children, of those who looked to me as a stable voice of reason in a world of chaos. That is a testimony to my total lack of character.

    When I decided to make a firm commitment and stay celebate, my life turned around. I was lonely at times, poor at times, but I was my own woman. I got to know myself and what purpose I wanted in my life. My life took a break from the need to work on a relationship. It was a very nice time actually. I learned to love and respect myself. I kinda surrendered that part of myself and focused on raising my teenage son, and helping JWs leaving find support like this Forum, websites, books, chats, etc.

    Then I met a man with the exact same purpose as mine, living like I was. Living out his purpose to serve others. If I had not been living with my level of commitment, if he had not been, we would have never met up or been the succesful couple that we are today. We get things done in the Community not because we are great or virtuous, but because we had the same virtuous vision, and now share the same purpose. This same scenario applies to whatever your purpose or vision is in life.

    I'm not saying my way (Biblical standards) are right for everyone. They were right for me. I have experienced so many broken hearted ladies, friends, family and aquaintences who have suffered so much because they did not have a set of standards or life purpose. Sex was fun and shacking up is convenient at times, but the majority of the relationships ended. That's because men and women are not wired the same way. That is why shacking up and casual sex doesn't always end well either. Sex with the deepest commitment is deeply passionate.

    For most women sex is love. For most men sex feels good and it would be nice to do it again later. Women have always had the heaviest burden to bear. We get pregnant. We lactate. Men without a purpose can leave and do. Women think like a bowl of spagetti, we can multi-task and every spagetti strand is enterwined at the same time. Men think and live like a waffle, one box at a time. They have to leave one box (stream of thought) to enter another. Chastity is of great benefit to a woman who is a natural nurtering multi tasker. Until that man is ready to jump into permanent commitment box, a womens heart is at risk...

    dang.... sorry I've written a novel..all this of course in my humblest of opinions and personal experiences. Love to all~Kate

  • Big Dog
    Big Dog

    Virtue is its own reward.

  • 144001

    Use it or lose it.

  • rebel8

    What does this have to do with atheism?

  • lonelysheep

    I'm not exactly sure what you're trying to get at here.

    Forgoing sex and being athiest means what?

    I'm both. Is it a waste of time, No.

  • joelbear

    sex is a bodily function. you should certainly have safe sex, but i see nothing to be gained from stopping a bodily function.

  • RubaDub

    would you find a virtuous person a more trustworthy partner for example? Does it make for more stable marriages?

    Yes, no question about it .... especially when sharing the events with another couple.

    Rub a Dub

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