pray to tetragod, and experience something you never have before...

by tetrapod.sapien 100 Replies latest jw friends

  • fairchild
    fairchild
    Please let me meet you...

    yes yes, me too..

  • tetrapod.sapien
    tetrapod.sapien

    lonelysheep my princess of every sort of enjoyable lawlessness,

    Our athiestically tetragod in the cold northearth:

    Please bring me Jason Kidd, for I realized that in person, he is just as fine as he is on tv. Give me this daily dough called money, for I am poor by nj standards and banks still want more from me. I ask for forgiveness for not flirting as much as you deserve; for you are to be flirted with often, as we are mere women, ungrateful of all these answered prayers u give out of love? Lastly, oh wise tetragod, please bestow upon me an all-inclusive trip to hedonism.

    In JT's name,


    amen

    ah yes, a worthy choice to close one's prayers with.

    i cannot give you jason kidd and his bank account, for i could not get past his receptionist. but you may have me as anything you wish including jason kidd. and may the fantasy work for you, amen.
    and may the flirtations continue to time indeffinate. and many shall your days of flirting be. and in the beginning there was fliratation between the serpent and the woman, and the woman sinned with the serpent, and both had a smoke. for i love all, and want to come into the innermost chambers of all, and have my love taken, amen, praise!
    and may you listen, and hear! the hedonism is in your being, and there is no right and wrong. and you are perfect in your laziness and grape eating and wine drinking. let your fear of hedonism pass through you and over you. and when it is gone, only hedonism will be left. and we'll lay in bed all week and play the guitar and rent a bunch of stanley kubrick movies, and soak up every lazy good for nothing pleasure. bliss. nirvana. heaven.
    tetragod
    $22;
  • tetrapod.sapien
    tetrapod.sapien

    misspeaches my concubine of tequila shots and padded handcuffs,

    Father TetraGod - How bless-ed you truly are.
    now that you have come into my chambers, indeed i am.

    I humbly approach you and beseech that you please hear my supplications.
    please, supplicate me.

    First of all praise be to you for your ever entertaining ways. You art a God amongst Gods. Amen.

    Secondly please grant the prayer requests from your ever humble ever adoring servant Miss Peaches....

    • Please let the horrible boy who lives at my house move out.
    • Please let me come home to a house sparkling clean.
    • Please let me meet you...

    Amen!

    may the mean boy someday move out. and behold! someday he will move out! praise! may your mind continue on in wonderful and dirty ways while your house becomes clean with the blood of the lamb. this full bodied, berry-bouqueted shiraz is my blood, drink it. this raw steak is my flesh, lightly grill it and eat it. and this bong is my spirit, and from it do not depart. and from these commands do not stray, all your days. and may the day come when we shall meet. and let there be spankings, and bikini-wrestling and home made movies. amen lord, amen. tetraslutgod $23;
  • misguided
    misguided

    Oh great tetragod,

    I must see thee, touch thee, smoke with thee, worship thee...

    ...will be in Alberta next week...

    ...so how much will that privilege cost me?

    Rose

    PS..when did tetragod set up his almightyness in Leipenchtein (sp???)...is that, like, another Brooklyn???

  • misspeaches
    misspeaches
    may the mean boy someday move out. and behold someday he will move out! praise!

    Hurrah for I fear I am on a downwards cycle of using his toothbrush and bath towel in manners that they should not!

    may your mind continue on in wonderful and dirty ways while your house becomes clean with the blood of the lamb. this full bodied, berry-bouqueted shiraz is my blood, drink it. this raw steak is my flesh, lightly grill it and eat it. and this bong is my spirit, and from it do not depart. and from these commands do not stray, all your days.

    I shall endeavour to not let you down. I shall find images so controversial your jaw shall sit open in shock. I shall concentrate on this and let the good vibes attend to cleaning my house. Shiraz is a favourite of mine and I will drink it with delight! I like my steak cooked medium yum! The bong I don't know about. I have tried the magic smoke and I say things that I later regret.

    and may the day come when we shall meet. and let there be spankings, and bikini-wrestling and home made movies

    If that is what I need to do to supplicate you then so be it. May we include some pillow fights dressed in our undergarments. Ever your very humble and adoring servant... Miss Peaches.

  • tetrapod.sapien
    tetrapod.sapien

    rose my two horned temptress of machinations of green devils,

    Oh great tetragod,

    I must see thee, touch thee, smoke with thee, worship thee...

    ...will be in Alberta next week...

    ...so how much will that privilege cost me?

    Rose

    your prayer shall be answered and fulfilled. amen, and praise! for i am the god of answered prayers! 23 and counting!

    and let us meet and see and touch and smoke and worship. and it shall come to pass in those days. and let it be for free! and let it be a swell time, and let all the sins of the world wash away with their respective holy books. and it shall come to pass, a gathering of the two horned temptress and the tetragod. meow and amen.

    "His lack of education is more than compensated for by his keenly developed moral bankruptcy." - Woody Allen

    tetragod

    $24;

  • tetrapod.sapien
    tetrapod.sapien

    misspeaches my pinnacle of evolution and fulfiller of 1 cor. 15:33,

    let there be no regrets between us. and let the magic smoke have you say the most regrettable of things, and let there be no regret, only acceptance and much laughter.

    praise be to our under garments! amen.

    tetragod

    $25;

  • LittleToe
    LittleToe

    I could never pray to someone who doesn't capitalise their sentences. Poor punctuation is an obvious sign of lack of omnipotence. Strike me dead if you can reach me, oh impotent one...

    LT, "Heretic" class

  • jula71
    jula71

    Ohhhhhh great, all-wise, all-knowing Tetra I want and we all need:

    1) The Fair Tax bill to pass

    2) The end of Socialism

    3) And a new XBOX 360!!!!

    (jula of the give me 2 out of 3 and make me a believer class)

  • Scully
    Scully
    oh impotent one

    On second thought, I think I'll pass on that movie, tetragod. Impotence is such a drag.

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