You know when I think about myself, which I do a lot because I pretty self absorbed, it really makes me wonder who else sitting around me in the KH are faking it too.
By all accounts I probably seem to most of them to be the poster child for the society. I pioneered, was appointed at 17, and then appointed as an elder in my mid 20s. I have the most responsibilities of any man in my hall, not because I don't suck, but the others are getting old and just can't do it. With the small body we have, I have at least 1 but usually 2 parts on Thursday nights, the hall book study, the Watchtower and the service committee. I have circuit and district level responsibilities and 1 or 2 public talks a month. So it's not unheard of for me to make 2 meetings on Sunday; to do the WT and then leave town for a talk. The thing is I don't believe any of it. I'm a self confirmed apostate.
This can't be all that uncommon. I wish I could tell who else is out there. Who else do I rub shoulders and shake hands with that looks, walks and talks 'witness' but isn't a witness. Could we devise a secret hand shake or something?