My two week consulting trip to Bethel (the beginning of the end) Part 5

by seven006 105 Replies latest jw friends

  • Panda
    Panda

    Dave, Shotgun is right. I should've PM'd you.

    But just to set a few things straight: Yes I have a good marriage and Nick is wonderful. Yes we did all of the expected jw things which I'm almost afraid to mention because someone might think I'm trying to post my own story on your thread.

    And, as an Elder my husband did read CoC. It was the final step before he stepped down.

    Panda

  • seven006
    seven006

    Panda,

    I'm glad you have a good marriage. You're lucky. I'm glad Nick was smart enough to see the truth.
    As far as the rest of all this goes, I'm not going to worry about it, this kind of thing happens.

    Dave

  • obiwan
    obiwan

    I try not to let peoples individual issues get to me. I learned a long time go, and am still learning, not to take things so personal. I think that comes from being raised in a socially and intellectually inclosed plastic bubble.

    Man, that is so true. Don't feel bad about you still learning, I just realized the statement above about a month ago. Your way ahead of me, I give you prop's for your continuing effort to "better" yourself. Your right, it is tuff to face your own issue's and find what a jackass you've been. I've been there, and sometimes I'm still there...dammit!

    You keep on doing what you've been doing. I know that's what I'm trying to accomplish as well.

  • Wren
    Wren

    Just checked in today to see any cont. story. I only read seven's posts, but noticed a reference to elders, so went back and read all posts. Here's a belated reply reading between the lines on the elders. o.k., overseer & servents, I left this location the year before the elders arrangement.

    I'm speaking from JW elder & community pov. in a staid, Quaker based, rural community back 28-33 yrs.ago. (I remember the big event when pantyhose first came to town.)

    Here's two kids, one is fresh out of a divorce scandal. Remember, any divorce is a scandal. Now that they've tarnished forever the impending marriage, they still want a big, white, flashy wedding. Let's see, what are the attitudes present here. No. 1, No, you can not use the KH for the event and no, none of the elders will give the talk. No. 2, What kind of obnoxious children are you anyway to have a big wedding at all? Now, run along and don't embarrass yourselves anymore and take any hope of a fairy tale wedding with you. What kind of upright self respecting BOE and KH community would not think this way?

    This sounds harsh, overly critical and dramatic, but the JW social club atmosphere is a pressure to reckon with if you have "mud" on your shoes. This is the same group that will drag up a new friend's DF history in polite conversation whether it has been one year, sixty years, or post mortum.

    I can sympathise. I was married the same year at eighteen so I could have sex and still be in the believers club. This, under less than ideal circumstances, also. While practicing our vows with an harried elder of six children, he privately advised us that we could call the whole thing off now and that it was perfectly all right, and that no one would think the worse of us. He was so convinced the marriage was an impending disaster.

  • UpAndAtom
    UpAndAtom

    seven006,

    Personally I would rather read your words in paperback form (and not on a emotionally cold computer screen), whilst my elbows rest on my hard, cold and sterile desk (I need to rub lotion into them). I'd rather read your words whilst curled up in bed during a thunderstorm (such as happened tonight), or laying down on the thick grass in my backyard on a warm spring day (any day now). I'd rather read sitting on my couch, or during a boring airline flight or even whilst sitting on the throne.

    If you feel you've posted enough on this board, then that's fine with me. Copy the text, and save it for your paperback... after all, discussion boards are places to start things, and never to finish them. Could someone argue otherwise?

    Cheers,

    UpAndAtom.
    PS. ...and everyone else reading this thread is to purchase seven006's paperback when it comes out, and to give it excellent reviews on Amazon.com - no arguments!

  • seven006
    seven006

    UpandAtom,

    Thanks for your kind words. Right now I am too busy with work to do any more than add a thought or two to existing threads. As much as I would like some of what I have experienced to be put and print so that possibly a few may gain something from it, I go back and forth about whether I really want to do it. I do not pretend to be any kind of writer. I'm a damn good artist, but that is where my creativity and talent stops. I am not kidding myself.

    I have started part 6 a few times but even though I have come a long way, it remains difficult to openly admit on a public forum how much of an idiot I once was and openly admit the mistakes I made in my past. To tell a complete story based on facts, all facts must be revealed so the reader can benefit from the transition from stupidity to finally getting a clue and then making changes.

    I was not your average clueless idiot, I excelled at clueless stupidity as I was transforming from a life of mental programing in a cult to trying and be a normal person. I'm still working on being a normal person.

    Maybe if I went back to the beginning of all this with me as a child it will be easier. I don't know. Right now I have enough illustration projects to tie me up for a month or so. When things slow down I'll think about adding to this.

    I'm glad you got something out of this. If you send me a PM. I will give you my phone number. It's a lot easier to admit my past stupidity and what I did to change that in a one on one basis then opening that trench coat of embarrassing truth to the entire world to see.

    Dave

  • StinkyPantz
    StinkyPantz

    Dave-

    This wasn't directed towards me but it's true of my feelings for you :

    you seem to have some kind of mental hard-on for me

    Why does that not sound like an insult to me?

    ---

    But seriously. I have truly enjoyed your story. Thank you.

  • seven006
    seven006

    Stinky,

    That statement was meant as a subtle insult when Panda and I were having a little dispute. We have since worked it out and I have apologized for my statement. I can get a bit graphic at times, I'm working on that.

    To all,

    I just got back from getting my haircut for the first time in almost a year. The lady who cuts my hair is the same person that I was going to talk about in part 6. She was the first girlfriend I had after leaving the religion and my ex-wife. She is also the only ex-girlfriend I have stayed in contact with as a friend for the past 19 years. I wanted to run the idea of a book and or telling the story here on the board by her since she was a pivotal part of my transformation into normality. I told her I was only going to talk about when we first met. She couldn't help but laugh. Talk about fish out of water. I felt like a kindergarten kid walking into a freshman college class and being asked to catch up.

    Since she is no longer mad at me for not wanting to be her room mate a year ago (that's why the year long hair growth, I learned not to get a woman with sharp scissors in her hand mad at you) she gave her blessing on telling the story. As soon as I get time, I will finish part six and post it.

    Dave

  • StinkyPantz
    StinkyPantz

    Dave-

    That statement was meant as a subtle insult when Panda and I were having a little dispute. We have since worked it out and I have apologized for my statement.

    Dude, I know. . .

    I can get a bit graphic at times, I'm working on that.

    I like it (that was my point) .

  • seven006
    seven006

    <<<I like it (that was my point) .>>>

    Dudette, I figured that.

    Dave

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit