Why My Wife and I Have No Kids

by JT 66 Replies latest jw friends

  • princecharmant
    princecharmant

    JT,

    Too many complicated circumstances. I have checked out - mentally - but I haven't left. In some thread last week where you and I commented, I wrote a little bit on my current status. But I feel like you're a close friend I've known for years, well down the road from H2O when it was the board to read and participate in.

    Regards to you and your wife.

    pc

  • LDH
    LDH
    a number of the single women could not "Wait on Jah" and they have ventured out into Streets and not knowing what to look for in a Good Man besides the WT definition( high hours, reads all his mags and comes to all the meeting) they don't know what to look for in a man

    Because all their lives they've been told about the difference between a 'spiritual' man and a 'physical' one. And in their little world, the 'spiritual' man always wins.

    Who cares if you need a reliable car? Health Insurance? A financial plan for the future? Get yourself a spiritual man, and 'Jehovah will take care of the rest'. These girls are in for a rude awakening because when they finally meet Slick Willy they are like deer in the headlights. And they are vulnerable to every bullshit talker out there.

    This comment was dead on JT.

    BTW, I'm married and 8.5 mos, the only thing my parents said when I told them I was pregnant, "These are HARD TIMES to raise a kid in. Armegeddon is right around the corner. I hope you THOUGHT about it before you decided to do it!"

    No words of congratulations, and to this date not even one phone call from my mother to see how I am (even though she knows I'm having the pregnancy from hell) because in her words she doesn't want to get close to another grandchild that is just going to die at Armegeddon.

    And JW want to say 'no natural affection' in the world. Yeah, because of assholes like them.

    JT don't sweat it, my hubby is 43 and this is his first baby. He's been waiting his whole life to meet someone whom he could have a family with.

    Lisa
    Walking like a penguin class

  • Black Man
    Black Man

    up............

  • minimus
    minimus

    This is an example of JT's threads. He was one of my favorite posters. He got you thinking, that's for sure!

  • sherrie11
    sherrie11

    I wonder how a lot of those older brother's and sisters who didnt have kids because "the end was so near" feel now when they see the organisation promoting Sophie and Caleb. Promoting children getting baptised.

    Back in the day there is no way witness's were made to feel good about having children since the end was so near.

    I was married and got pregnant in the 90's and was frowned upon for it.

    When was the last time any of their publications promoted the agenda "dont have kids the end is near"?

    My heart really goes out those that listened to this cult and never had kids. Ihope some of them woke up.

  • life is to short
    life is to short

    I woke up but too late to have kids. One of my biggest regrets in life also. I was just talking to a JW women about a month ago and this sister who is in her mid 30's is having her first child and this JW women was going on about how this is just not the time to have kids. Yet this JW had two kids in the 90's when "it was not the time to have kids". I just hate the judgmental stupidity of the cult. It's not OK for anyone else to do it but I can.

    I look back on all of those who told me to pioneer and server where the need was great, etc and I did what they said without thinking now I realize that they are the ones who had five, six kids. Why did I not see how hypocritical they were at the time is beyond me now. I was told to keep my blinders on and I did a good job of it. I was so blinded by the cult that I could not see the forest beyond the trees, I have only myself to blame for being so stupid. It is all so clear now looking back.

    LITS

  • truthseeker100
    truthseeker100
    Life is to short. Take heart this is exactly the way things were meant to be.Like forrest Gump said that all I have to say about that! The whole world still loves you! And you are talking to a guy that has been to the North Pole LOL I have been to the top of the world and someone like you is important! Believe me?
  • Magnum
    Magnum

    I wonder how a lot of those older brother's and sisters who didnt have kids because "the end was so near" feel now when they see the organisation promoting Sophie and Caleb. Promoting children getting baptized.

    My wife and I are in our 50's and are childless because of having been JWs. We discuss this topic often. I will never forget the talk given at 1987 district conventions, Responsible Child-bearing in This Time of the End. Because of that and all the other material from the org, we actually thought it was wrong to have children. We thought we were on the verge of the Great Tribulation.

    We now wonder who will tend to us when we get older. I have a fear of ending up in a nursing home with nobody to make sure I'm not mistreated if my wife's not around to care for me. We have nobody.

    Funny thing is that if all, or at least more, JWs had really listened to what the org said back then, there would be far fewer JWs today, as it seems that most of the growth now comes from within.

    When was the last time any of their publications promoted the agenda "dont have kids the end is near"?

    I haven't seen that in the publications for a long time, and it infuriates me. They preached that to me and then they dropped it as if it's no big deal. They mess with people's lives and never apologize for their wrongs. The faithful and discreet slave ain't so discreet. I've often mentioned to my wife that some of the JW children who were conceived after that talk in 1987 now themselves have borne children.

    I hope some of them woke up.

    Your hopes are realized. Some did, including my wife and me.

  • Vanderhoven7
    Vanderhoven7


    Recommendations against Marriage and Child Bearing

    http://www.jwfacts.com/watchtower/quotes/marriage-child-bearing.php

    Jehovah's Witnesses are not against marriage or children and work hard to have happy families. For instance, the Watchtower 2011 October 15 states on page 13, "Individual Christians today also have the right to decide for themselves whether to get married or to stay single. Others should not pressure them to take one course or another." However, particularly during times of heightened expectation of Armageddon, the Watchtower Society has encouraged children and marriage to be postponed till after Armageddon; reasoning it detracts from the work of spreading their message in these "last days." Those that followed such advice in previous decades have missed the joy of having their own family, one of the the principle joys of life.


    Watchtower 2008 Apr 15 p.19 Single and childless for a Noble purpose.
    "... numerous couples have decided to remain childless ... to remain free to serve Jehovah ... putting Kingdom interests above some of the privileges that go with marriage ... Jehovah will not forget their work, and the love they show for his name... There will be a great tribulation ... it will be difficult time for us adults and children alike ..."

    Watchtower 2000 August 1 p.21 Why Do They Have No Children?
    "Although Noah's three sons were all married, none fathered children until after the Deluge. While this does not imply that it is wrong to have children today, many Christian couples decline to have children so as to become more fully involved in the urgent work that Jehovah has given his people to do. Some couples have waited for a time before having children; others have decided to remain childless and consider the possibility of bearing children in Jehovah's righteous new world."

    Watchtower 1988 March 1 p. 19 Childbearing Among God's People
    "If the expansion of Christianity was to come about mainly by childbearing, Jesus would not have encouraged his disciples to "make room" for singleness "on account of the kingdom of the heavens." (Matthew 19:10-12)
    How should Christians view marriage and childbearing today, in this "time of the end"? (Daniel 12:4) It is truer than ever that "the scene of this world is changing," or, as another translation puts it, "the present scheme of things is rapidly passing away."-1 Corinthians 7:31, Phillips. Now, as never before, "the time left is reduced." Yes, only a limited time remains for Jehovah's people to finish the work he has given them to do, namely: "This good news of the kingdom will be preached in all the inhabited earth for a witness to all the nations; and then the end will come." (Matthew 24:14) That work must be accomplished before the end comes. It is, therefore, appropriate for Christians to ask themselves how getting married or, if married, having children will affect their share in that vital work.
    During all this pre-Flood period, Noah's sons and their wives had no children."

    Awake! 1974 November 8 p.11
    "Today there is a great crowd of people who are confident that a destruction of even greater magnitude is now imminent. The evidence is that Jesus' prophecy will shortly have a major fulfilment, upon this entire system of things. This has been a major factor in influencing many couples to decide not to have children at this time. They have chosen to remain childless so that they would be less encumbered to carry out the instructions of Jesus Christ to preach the good news of God's kingdom earth wide before the end of this system comes. -Matt.24:14."

    Children (1941) 3,000,000 ed. pp.312-313
    "Should men and women, both of whom are Jonadabs or "other sheep" of the Lord, now marry before Armageddon and bring forth children? They may chose to do so, but the admonition or advice of the scriptures appears to be against it.

    Face the Facts (1938) pp.46-50
    "Would it be Scripturally proper for them to now marry and to begin to rear children? No, is the answer, which is supported by the Scripture . Those Jonadabs who now contemplate marriage, it would seem, would do better if they wait a few years, until the fiery storm of Armageddon is gone..."

    Watchtower 1938 November 1 p.324
    "...mark the words of Jesus, which definitely seem to discourage the bearing of children immediately before or during Armageddon

    Golden Age 1937 January 27 edition "That Delusion Called Love"
    "God's consecrated people do well to refrain from marriage unless they find themselves continually tormented with desire for sexual intercourse, in which case they should marry. For those of the younger or older who have need to marry on this score, let them dispose of the matter in candor and honesty shunning the blight, the delusions and illusions of "love" so called and courtship, which bring reproach on the holy name of Jehovah."

  • sherrie11
    sherrie11

    Magnum I am so glad you and your wife woke up.

    This rotten cult can add childlessness to its crimes along with people dying from blood shunning child abuse and it goes on.

    The sister who got me in the borg went to Brooklyn bethel and Gillead School in the sixties with her husband. She was probably in her early fifites when she studied with me. I remember how sad she would look when seeing the kids in the hall or a sister pregnant. I never go tthe chance to ask her if she wished she had kids. i would of probably got the standard we put Jehovah first. I wish i could contact her my heart goes out to her she would be nearly 80 possibly by now.

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