Sorry BT. I understood you wanted to be reinstated ASAP so I simply gave you the theocratic answer to your question. JW reality. Reality you will have to deal with during your time out and even after the congregation allows you back in. Some here feel my remarks were mean. If it appears that way I apologize. I gave you the congregation’s viewpoint. I hope you realize you will need to grow a thick skin.
A childhood friend of mine went through the same situation as you. The only difference was the elders had warned her before it all happened. After she was df’d she decided, like you, she needed to get back into the congregation. She asked me for suggestions. Here is what I told her.
Download the elder’s secret manual off the net. Read it carefully. You can’t play a game if you don’t know the rules.
Study up on repentance. It is the key to reinstatement. You need to know what it really means and how to show it.
Be patient. This is going to take some time.
#2 was difficult for my friend because she and her new husband didn’t really regret what they had done. They felt it was their only choice. However you need to know this: People are not disfellowshipped for their ‘sin’. You can do some serious stuff and get off with just a reprimand if you’re repentant. People are disfellowshipped because the elders feel they are not repentant. That’s the Watchtower’s rule. Even for an appeals committee the brothers are reminded beforehand that they must judge if the person was repentant at the time of the df’ing hearing. If the person wasn’t repentant, the df’ing stands.
In the coming months you will need to demonstrate ‘true repentance’. Familiarize yourself with exactly what it means and how best to demonstrate it. You need to convince the brothers that you deeply regret having damaged you relationship with Jehovah, the congregation, and your family. By your actions and words this must be reflected. Before you do, or don’t do, something ask yourself, “Will this give the impression I’m truly sorry for what I did? The question should help you decide what is appropriate and what is not. When you are finally granted a meeting with the elders, be prepared to explain to them what you’ve done to repair your relationship with Jehovah and the congregation and what you are going to do in the future to safeguard them.
Wishing you the best of luck.
I’ll finish with the end of my friends story. She got her "repentance" down pat and was reinstated after a little more than 1 year. However her new husband tried to convince the elders they had been harsh and complained about other situations in the congregation. His reinstatement meetings dragged on and on. Finally his wife helped him out with his “repentance”. They are now back in and changed congregations soon after his reinstatement.
Wheels