Larry
I think that we visit the dead for OURSELVES to bring a sort of closure and to help us heal. We may even talk to the dead loved one, but we know deep down that they can't hear us. But still we do what makes US feel better, placing flowers, candles, etc. at their grave.
Saying that visiting the dead is a waste of time is just one more way in which the Watchtower interferes with natural grief and human emotion. Get out in service, it will take your mind off your troubles.....yeah, right.
Free