humbled

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Posts by humbled

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  35

  How do you deal with people who do not like you?

  by usualusername1 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hi guysin the last year i have started to socialise a lot more.

  namely comedy and a tennis social club.. for a variety of reasons i find socialising tough.

  in my tennis club a couple of women have been extremely rude to me and i have blocked one from my phone and refuse to speak to both.. is my behaviour extreme?paul.

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  humbled

  Morpheus —“ Peoples opinion of me is none of my business.”
  Coco: "Never explain yourself, your friends dont need it & your enemies will never believe it!"

  Perhaps Paul is confounded by a thing that puzzles all of us from time to time: The moment when we discover that a person we felt was in our “friend camp” is not. In fact we are shocked to learn they are hostiles. Enemies.

  Friends are those to whom we talk freely. From whom receive free comment, occasional questions, often support—at the very least —respect.

  When a person of my acquaintance—one whose goodwill l had no reason to doubt— shows a readiness to harm me, l readjust. But I do not castigate myself for having thought them a friend.

  Afterward l will maintain a buffer in my mind from this person who thinks badly of me. I do not try to engage them —even reasonably because there is a saying that is very true:

  “Ill will never spoke well.”

  There is a lot of good advice here.

  I do think for JW’s it can be difficult figuring out authentic interactions since WTBTS programming discouraged emotional honesty.
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  73

  Punctuation within and without quotation marks

  by compound complex in

  1. social
  2. physical

  http://www.grammarbook.com/punctuation/quotes.asp .

  would someone please make this link clickable?.

  cc.

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  humbled

  jp1692–

  1. Does it make sense?

  1. Does it have style?

  Everything else is just filler.

  I appreciate that remark. I do value good writing and struggle toward it though it is often beyond me.

  Your comment indicates something that touches on a subject thread Coco brought up a day or so ago on the art of debate-ln my mind without a little goodwill on the side of the person you are trying to communicate with one’s best efforts to express thought will inevitably fail due to one’s lack of expertise in the art of written words. In written conversation the desire to understand what another person is trying to express can either be revealed as an examination of a subject or as ...something else entirely.

  As quite an aside and yet somewhat related, I used to most enjoy watching the sign language interpreters . “sense and style” through body and facial expression beyond commas and grammars’ reach. I love it.
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  180

  Languages, Dialects, Accents

  by LoveUniHateExams in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  just though i'd start a thread devoted to languages, dialects/sociolects and accents, with the idea being that posters can comment on any language, or dialect or accent of any language, on this thread.. any phrases, expressions or idioms that you find interesting are also welcome.

  first, the subject of english accents came up on another thread.. the british isles have many different types of accent (although many of the dialects may be dying out), and if i start to take a closer look, i can't help but see 'patterns' .... in received pronunciation of standard english, the letter r is pronounced initially, between vowels, and after consonants, e.g.

  red, arrow, break.

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  humbled

  In 1973-74 I lived in Dublin. My job in Germany as an au pair(sp?) had folded and l wanted to see the land of my ancestors before going home to Arkansas. Ireland and the US share the English tongue? I had to develop an ear for Dublinese.

  I was sketching along the banks of the Liffey when a couple young fellows approached and said something to me. I asked him to repeat it as I didn’t understand. They did -and I didn’t again. Again l asked for a repeat with no better results. I never knew their original question but as they gave up in disgust my ear picked up their final remark “air yea feckin diff?”

  What a beautiful conversation. If only we could hear each person’s actual voice instead of reading it. Thanks Diogenesister for the video on the Edwardians.

  Rub a dub: (edit) hilarious: “day-ed” reminds me of sounds around the hills where l live
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  20

  Did you learn how to debate in school (or elsewhere)?

  by compound complex in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  last night i was taking another look at the term "dialectics":.

  the art of investigating or discussing the truth of opinions: discussion; debate; logical reasoning; etc.. the dialectical method is, at base, a discourse between two or more people holding different points of view about a subject but wishing to establish the truth through reasoned arguments.. while i intend to do further research on my own, what is your own experience regarding preparation for debate, the do's and don'ts, maintaining your cool, .

  i ask, in part, because i observe that some online debaters present facts and figures and use sound reasoning while maintaining their decorum; many do not.. thank you..

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  humbled

  You have introduced the nitro and the glycerin, Coco. There is discussion and there is debate. Let’s see how it shakes out.

  Your thread is inviting discussion that invites subjective comment. It will be interesting to see if it gets diverted into caustic debate.

  You are inviting others to respectfully probe a topic that defies the use of facts and figures—unless by some means we were able to establish (for instance) the number of posters who abandon discussions -or even this forum -not on account of facts, figures and sound reasoning -but because of what you call a “lack of decorum” that renders discussions null and void of value.

  .

  Thank you, gentleman Coco. I will try to maintain a ladylike demeanor.
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  44

  My Dissociation letter

  by TJ Curioso in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  hi to everyone!i was summoned to the judicial committee and went.

  it was a respectful conversation from one side to the other.

  in the end i handed the dissociation letter in hand and a binding to each of the elders, with an article i wrote on the subject, "are jehovah's witnesses a destructive sect?

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  humbled

  Your letter was filled with two qualities the Organization made war on: individual responsibility and real love.

  A beautiful letter.

  I have no use for theology now. But individual responsibly and real love — teachings attributed to Jesus hold me together. Was he just a r&f Jewish Carpenter? I truly do not believe it matters.

  l am glad that you measured out why you disassociated in your letter. I know it would have affected me even at the height of my JW attachment if l had read it.

  Thanks for sharing it.
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  34

  Growing a beard

  by Coded Logic in

  1. social
  2. physical

  i've always been currious as to how i would look with a beard so i've finally committed to doing it.

  over the next 30 days i'm going to grow out a full chin to ear beard.. .

  ps:  any suggestions or advice on how to grow a beard would be much appreciated!.

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  humbled

  If your skin gets funky, itchy, flakey like it does for some guys( three guys l know had that trouble) buy pine tar soap and shampoo your beard with it.

  Maybe sounds weird but it is not an uncommon problem and pine tar soap is a fine old remedy. Check it out on line.

  Good luck, fella!
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  41

  Are there any instances of "GOD" order and/or condoning the rape of women in the bible?

  by Black Man in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  this came up recently with my dyed-in-the-wool jw pioneer mother, who swears up and down that there are no scriptural instances of this happening.

  i seem to remember a couple passages, but can't remember where they were..

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  humbled

  “I have real rabbi work to do.”—Rabbi Midge

  This thread isn’t about Judaism or college. It asked if there were instances where God ordered the rape of women. People on the forum cited a lot of scriptures (God’s Word, so they say). Those scriptures were/are misogynistic and there are more than those that portray women as inferior.

  Jews and Christians have for hundreds of years perpetuated bad attitudes toward women based on those scriptures. Men of high education have used those scriptures.

  I said most ex-JWs didn’t need a professor or a rabbi to figure out that these scriptures were no good. You talked down to these people. l didn’t find a generous spirit in your comments.

  You are not entirely honest about the residual imbalance in the traditional divorce process among Jews.

  I am out of this . Try to grow your heart as well as your mind. But here, enjoy getting in the last word, Rabbi Midge:

  “Get your facts straight. If you going to run with the big educated dogs, you had better be ready to keep up with them. Otherwise stay on the porch.
  And yes, that's from a rabbi. We ain't sissy Christian preachers or sweet nuns. This thread is not about you, and nobody cares about your feelings, honey. Get your facts straight or get an education or get out of the way.”
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  41

  Are there any instances of "GOD" order and/or condoning the rape of women in the bible?

  by Black Man in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  this came up recently with my dyed-in-the-wool jw pioneer mother, who swears up and down that there are no scriptural instances of this happening.

  i seem to remember a couple passages, but can't remember where they were..

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  humbled

  College, midge. My daughters went to college. They are working in places where college has value. You do not know where l live. The troubles that are overwhelming my community, the well educated are not willing to help lift “ not even with their little finger”

  l am not referring to welfare.

  You might say to me “you don’t know what you don’t know”.

  And l say the same to you.

  College would be wonderful...who doesn’t need it? But for the work that l am doing??? And You are a Rabbi? You think a fine distinction between the Catholic and Jewish tradition in liturgy matters in my world? Please.

  But you are condescending to persist in this admonition for me to go to college -NOW-when you don’t know anything about me. You can declare how right your view is.. that college will set me on a good road. This might even sound like wisdom.

  Do I will say this: The world should go to college.

  I believe that. I do. With all my heart.

  But there is this problem-hearts are not always made better by college. Not that that is the mission of higher education in the first place. No, there is a deeper need where l work.

  For now,I struggle for a world of better hearts than of better minds. A world of better hearts will soon be a world of better minds. The JW world worked for neither of these things .

  Jewish people place a high value on education and that is fine. So do l. Leave off carping on me about college.
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  15

  Connect the dots: Cut the baby in half

  by OrphanCrow in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  *thanks to bubba on reddit for the heads up this uplifting children's activity.

  what is the purpose of this activity?

  what is the message?

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  humbled

  Telling these stories to children as though they were normal histories of faith in God prepares them for abuse and mind manipulation. Normalizing extreme and murderous behavior to illustrate God’s “good” qualities and God‘s “wisdom” grooms children for vicious judgement and behavior-/both to receive it and to dole it out.

  As time passes l forgive myself for my behavior, my gullibility. The indoctrination was deep and terrible—and it is in so many churches, so many religions.My Book of Bible Stories is s god porn—really extreme and sick. By the time l recognized how twisted this stuff was l had been a JW over 20 years. The killing and sadistic stories just didn’t work for me.

  If there was a Jesus, l believe he had trouble with this shit too. Carpenters are generally free thinkers.
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  41

  Are there any instances of "GOD" order and/or condoning the rape of women in the bible?

  by Black Man in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  this came up recently with my dyed-in-the-wool jw pioneer mother, who swears up and down that there are no scriptural instances of this happening.

  i seem to remember a couple passages, but can't remember where they were..

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  humbled

  I did not grow up a witness. I value college for more than the parsing out of ancient patriarchal texts —while it may offer a profession for some has no binding moral value for me.

  As a former Catholic I view the use of liturgy with suspicion—the more emotional impact it carries because of my childhood the more careful l am of its power to subvert. We learned the mass in Latin. Who cared to teach?

  You are free to pursue academics. Someday I may go to college. It hasn’t been a possibility lately.

  I am glad that some have been gracious towards you. For my part I cannot appreciate your condescending manner. I have met it all too often in my many years around religious teachers.