When my son was 18, he told his father and I that he no longer wanted to go to the meetings. His father immediately kicked him out of the house. I remember it was the Friday of the CO Visit. My heart broke that night, the terrible gut-wrenching sobs that you never really recover from.
I was forbidden tohave anything to do with him, or to help him make his way in the world. But I disobeyed. I kept in touch with him against his father's wishes, gave him money, a job and the things he needed - dishes, sheets, towels, etc.
The people my son had grown up with, the people who had watched him grow up, his grandparents, aunts and uncles....it was as if he had died, but there was no funeral, and no one talked about him. It was as if he never existed. I believe only one person ever asked me how he was doing.
The part that bothered me was that we heard experiences at the assemblies and read them in the magazines about how WORLDLY people would cut off family members who became Witnesses, and this was proof of them being led by Satan. How was this any different? It doesn't make sense.
My son's own father was rejected by his Catholic family when he became a JW - but it was a brief rejecting. They weren't happy but they accepted him as part of the family no matter what he believed.
I have made it clear to my children that there is NOTHING they can do that will make me reject or shun them. It's been hard to convince them of this, because of their experience with the Witnesses.
Like Loz, I wish I had come to my senses and gotten my kids out earlier.
Palmtree, that was incredibly hard reading. It must have been awful for you. I really believe that it would feel like a death to have to have nothing to do with my children as adults.
The way Jehovahs Witnesses act in this regards disgusts me & anyone that I speak to about this issue feels the same.
JW's - Take a good look at yourselves. You are destroying lives!
jambon1
JoinedPosts by jambon1
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24
Loving your beutiful children
by jambon1 ini had little or no problems with my beliefs as an 18 year old convert to the jehovah's witness religion.
fair enough, there were a few things that i found a bit wacky & odd, but i was on the road to life.
i couldn't give a rats arse about many things.
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jambon1
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Loving your beutiful children
by jambon1 ini had little or no problems with my beliefs as an 18 year old convert to the jehovah's witness religion.
fair enough, there were a few things that i found a bit wacky & odd, but i was on the road to life.
i couldn't give a rats arse about many things.
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jambon1
Nice words chickpea.
It is true that the organisation puts people in the most awful positions.
In my case also, my kids come 1st every single time. It's just the way it has to be.
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Wimbledon Thank Yous
by scotinsw inas expected serena williams did her thank yous and the first one was "to my god jehovah".. we also found out that she has a lucky number - 13!!.
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jambon1
The Williams family make me boak.
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The old big orange "Paradise" book
by aquagirl inanyone remember that?
i learned to read on that book.there were some very disturbing images,like the earth opening up and people falling into it.like upside down ladies and hippies.id love to get a hold of one and peruse it with a friend and some herbal medicine.maybe there is one in the attic?anyway,that and the image of the snake talking to the beautiful,bare shouldered eve,who was holding an apple,made a big impression on me.any else have any faves from that book?is it still being used?.
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jambon1
This is my point over & over again.
Why do they get away with this abuse of childrens minds?
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Loving your beutiful children
by jambon1 ini had little or no problems with my beliefs as an 18 year old convert to the jehovah's witness religion.
fair enough, there were a few things that i found a bit wacky & odd, but i was on the road to life.
i couldn't give a rats arse about many things.
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jambon1
I had little or no problems with my beliefs as an 18 year old convert to the Jehovah's Witness religion. Fair enough, there were a few things that I found a bit wacky & odd, but I was on the road to life. I couldn't give a rats arse about many things. I had found the truth & I was working my way up the JW ladder of approval & appearance.
I was a silly little boy really. Little experience of life. And cockey and arrogant. How I cringe when I look back at my younger years. Always ready to give an opinion on things that I knew nothing about.
After a number of years of adult life, my JW beliefs had come to be rather fractious to me. Many things just didn't sit right. I suppose life was teaching me lessons & I became conflicted as I tried to reconcile what I was seeing in the real world with my what I was being taught at the Kingdom Hall.
Then - BOOM! I had my firstborn baby girl. What a prize! I always remember looking at her after she had been bathed the next day. I looked into her eyes & saw such beuty. Such vulnerability. I was in love. My life now revolved around this wonderful little girl.
The truth is that I realised there & then that I would do anything for my girl. No man, religion or book was going to be able to overpower or supress my natural inclination to love, protect & admire this offspring of mine. I knew that the love that was supposed to be due to god came nowhere near what I felt for my daughter. I was living on borrowed time, in terms of my lifespan as a Jehovahs Witness.
Around about 2002, an elder asked my if I could read from the platform a KM article. I agreed, not recalling what article it actually was. Upon looking at it, I realised that I had agreed to read the 'shunning of disfellowshiped relatives' article. I had already mentally scanned it & it made me feel uncomfortable to say the least.
The words in that article are callous, brutal & devoid of any hint of natural affection. I remember reading it on the platform & sitting down to digest what I had read as the meeting proceeded around me. I looked up to my baby girl & knew that under no circumstances could I ever shun her in her teenage or adult life for sins of the flesh or other silly 'crimes' that are deemed so by the WTS.
How can any loving parent shun their own flesh & blood?
My life as a JW was over there and then. For a further 4 years after reading that shit I simply went through the motions of being a JW. My emotions were torn between what I naturally felt as a parent & what I was being taught at the Kingdom Hall. Conflict, conflict, conflict. All the way. It was a terrible time.
I look at my children thesedays (I had a son in 2004) & sometimes I just simply watch them & listen to them. I don't have to say anything. They just talk. I love them so much that when I hear them talk & listen to their beutiful expressions I can many times feel tears well up in my eyes - just because I love them so much that it overwhelms me.
JW parents who carry out the WTS instruction to shun their children are beyond my understanding. How can they do this? Are they sub-human? It turns my stomach to think about how it must feel for a child (of any age) to be rejected by their parents. What good can possibly come from such action?
Jehovahs Witnesses can be lovely, nice, smiling people. I meet them all the time. Yet, their actions disgust me. They anger me. And they cause damage that is in many cases beyond repair.
Shame on anyone who supports or in any way endorse this disgusting doctrine.
Love your beutiful children.
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40
I saw the Queen today - well sort of
by Lady Lee inmy camera got to see her - the back of her.
too many people for me to get through with the wheelchair.
i stood up held my camera in the air and clicked in the direction i hoped she was in.
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jambon1
Princess Anne walked past me in a narrow street in Edinburgh once.
She looks like a horse.
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Has your " Self Esteem " Improved After Leaving Jehovah's Witnesses ?
by flipper init seems to be an issue that some have after leaving the witness cult because none of us were ever made to feel we were " good " enough or "valued " enough for what we were trying to accomplish in the cult.
growing up i had pounded into my head by my jw elder father what jesus said, " after doing all things remember you are good for nothing slaves , what we have done is what we ought to have done.
" then i thought to myself - " where's the joy in that ?
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jambon1
Good topic.
Yes, very much so.
I viewed myself very negatively due to the constand bombardment of 'nothings ever good enough'. In actual fact, I was a very good dad with a decent honest business & a lovely wife. Lots of positive things in my life. Yet I was constantly down on myself & rather depressed.
Very much changed days now though. The mental conditioning is gone forever. And I'll not let what happened to me happen to my children.
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The Jehovahs Witness family weekend
by jambon1 inhaving been out of the organisation for over 4 years and having finally released my kids from the hellish existance that is life as a jw, it struck me today how enjoyable our weekends are in comparison to when we were jw's.. the weekends are vital for us just now.
my wife doesn't work but i work full time from very early in the morning.
i don't get to see my beutiful children in the morning during the week.
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jambon1
I don't mean to be out of order here but can everyone just ignore the attention seeking poster and let the thread die.
The on topic comments have been excellent. Thanks.
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The Jehovahs Witness family weekend
by jambon1 inhaving been out of the organisation for over 4 years and having finally released my kids from the hellish existance that is life as a jw, it struck me today how enjoyable our weekends are in comparison to when we were jw's.. the weekends are vital for us just now.
my wife doesn't work but i work full time from very early in the morning.
i don't get to see my beutiful children in the morning during the week.
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jambon1
Thanks for the input guys. I'm sure that many of us felt the same way when we were witnesses. If people like that sort of life then no doubt they will continue to be witnesses. I just detected that so many JW's were absolutely fed up individuals. Fed up of an extreemly taxing routine while at the same time being kicked in the balls every time you went to the meeting for not doing enough. Crazy.
I encourage everyone to cherish their kids & spend as many fun times with them as possible. They're no kids for long!
PS - Besty - HHGH
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82
The Jehovahs Witness family weekend
by jambon1 inhaving been out of the organisation for over 4 years and having finally released my kids from the hellish existance that is life as a jw, it struck me today how enjoyable our weekends are in comparison to when we were jw's.. the weekends are vital for us just now.
my wife doesn't work but i work full time from very early in the morning.
i don't get to see my beutiful children in the morning during the week.
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jambon1
I do try to give my children the happiest of memories.
In no way is it easy. Everyone has it tough I believe. I have a million concerns for my kids & our future.
But I'll tell you this; I'll make my kids childhood a childhood. They won't sit through degrading porno Watchtowers on a Sunday morning. They will have no worries about life or death. They won't worry about grandad or granny who isn't a JW. Or daddy who stopped coming to have his ass grilled at the kingdom hall.
They will splash about on the beach. They will love going to the football & being with their grandad. I will love & kiss my kids no matter what they are or what they become.
Please, for the love of god, let your kids be kids.