I went to the same bookstudy for years at an elders house. The home was about 800 sq. ft. so you can imagine how small the living room was. In the summer the temp would sometimes reach the high 90's, even into the 100's. We were all crammed in there in our suits and pantyhose with no air conditioning. Ugh!
The only other young people besides my brother and sister were the elders kids. But they had other relatives there and they would all just sit together and laugh at their own private jokes. Occasionally we would see that they had treats for after the meeting but we were never invited to stay.
I pass that little house often on the way to visit my in-laws. It seems like a lifetime ago. I don't think anyone from that group is still in the "truth" except for the elder. His wife passed away and all the kids and relatives are out.
Posts by evita
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31Worst/strangest bookstudy group
by Virgochik inok, i was reading the "worst bookstudy book" thread, and it got me thinking about the worst book study groups i went to.
once, my dad was study conductor and the study was held in an elderly sister's home.
there was antique furniture and doilies on the tables.
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evita
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155
Whats the dumbest reason youve been counseled?
by avishai inmy friend was counseled for having a bad attitude because he wore white socks w/ his suit.
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evita
Yeah, you're right looking_glass
I can laugh now but it sure wasn't funny back then!
Eva -
155
Whats the dumbest reason youve been counseled?
by avishai inmy friend was counseled for having a bad attitude because he wore white socks w/ his suit.
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evita
In my late teens, my best friend was an elders daughter from another congregation. She wore a ton of makeup, had her hair professionally colored, and tooled around in a 2-door sporty car. She was an only child and quite priveleged compared to the rest of us poor slobs. We used to travel around together, occassionally visiting family friends. Once we visited a family of very strict dubs. I can't remember how we knew them. One elderly member had a photo of the pope and Hitler during WWII that he showed us. After we left, they couldn't find the picture so they accused my friend of taking it. I remember being spoken to by the elders and they said my friend was suspected because she wore so much makeup. Well, of course they found the pic and I don't remember hearing any apologies. Despite her "worldly" appearance she was a loyal dub. I was the one who left.
Another time I was counseled for having lunch at school with an unbaptized girl who was engaged to marry an unbeliever. Bad association. I was so lonely at school and she was very nice to me.
I was told I couldn't aux pioneer because my mag placement was too low. They were right on this one, I had no business pioneering because I hated field service and was terrified of dogs and people.
Then there was the time we had a new pioneer in our cong. We were a rural congregation and he was a hip kid from the city. Everyone worshipped at his feet. I went out in service with him and he drove recklessly and was very insulting. So I told my mom I wouldn't go out with him. She told the elders what happened and I was counselled for not respecting a brother and pioneer and can I try to be less judgemental. I think he got a slap on the hand later for sleeping with the PO's wife.
This whole topic makes me very sad remembering how misguided and repressed we all were.
Eva -
14
Whatever phase this is....
by merfi in~sigh~ hoping for a little bit of commiseration, or at the very least someone tell me this is normal and this too shall pass?
i'm in such a weird funk.
but i'm funky... i guess i *do* somewhat miss a few of the 'friends' at the kh.
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evita
Hi merfi
You're doing great! Leaving a cult is not for the faint of heart. For many, the most difficult time is right after making the big break. The loneliness and uncertainty can be overwhelming. But it does get better and you will be amazed at your ability to heal and move on.
Hugs,
Eva -
12
One of the twins had a wreck
by MsMcDucket inshe just had the wreck this afternoon.
she appears to be okay, so far, just a few cuts and bruises.
the car is totalled.
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evita
MsMcDucket
So sorry about the accident. I had a similar one coming home from college many years ago. Very scary!
I'm glad your daughter is okay and that she has friends who love and support her. I'm sure it is bittersweet to see your children bonding so strongly with others, especially JW's. You know what damage that can do to family relationships.
My sister-in-law had a tough time as a teenager. She left home, joined AA and found sponsors who became her new "parents". She even called them "mom and dad" in front of her real parents. It took many years, but eventually her sponsors had their own children to deal with and the relationship changed. My sister-in-law had to start working on a relationship with her family who she had rejected all those years.
IMHO, no one can replace your mom. I hope your daughters recognize that soon.
Hugs,
Eva -
37
The cancer has changed my wife
by outoftheorg inwe found out that she has pancreatic cancer that has spread to the liver and blood vessels.
she opted for chemo.
although we have good insurance, we still have to pay quite a bit towards the $17000.00 bill every three weeks for treatment.
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evita
Dear outoftheorg
This is such a difficult and sad situation. My mom was 69 when she died of cancer a little over a year ago. She only lived for eight weeks after her diagnosis and she chose not to have chemo for much the same reasons as your wife. We called in home hospice and they were very helpful to our whole family. They know all about quality of life issues and have lots of resources to help the family.
It was so hard to deal with the whole thing day after day. I was very afraid and basically freaked out at the thought of losing my mom. I still can't believe she's gone.
The best thing you can do is just be there for your wife as much as you can. You will never regret the time and love you share right now. Everyone else will have to deal with their issues in their own way. You have to focus on what's most important to you. Gently remind others of your priorities so you don't get distracted with relatively unimportant things. All these things are easier said than done when you're in crisis mode so be forgiving of yourself. Get the meds and support you need. Don't be ashamed to ask for help.
My heart goes out to you and your wife and loved ones.
Eva -
15
THANK YOU
by leftbelow ini sat awake last night thinking of all the nice people on this board and wanted to share a little about my situation.
my wife suffered a miscarriage (it was our 3rd) this time at 4 months.
we have tried for 6 years and we were sure this would be the one.
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evita
To left below and wife
I don't know what to say except I am so sorry for your loss.
I wish you happier times ahead.
Eva -
19
Support please
by unique1 inleftbelow is a very private person so i will not spill all the details here, but he has experienced a great loss.
due to circumstances he may not be able to log on for a few days, however i feel support in all ways helps.
please keep him and his family in your thoughts and prayers.
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evita
So sorry to hear of your difficulties. Will be thinking of you.
Eva -
29
Which annual JW event did you dislike the most?
by jambon1 ini actually never liked the memorial.
it was`nt a very spiritual occasion at all really.
i hated feeling guilty about not doing the scheduled bible reading.
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evita
Circuit Assemblies were so boring. They were always in dull places like Yuba City or Fremont. The assembly halls were dull, lifeless buildings with no place to hide. At least at the district conventions you could kill some time walking to the farthest bathroom.
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Good Friend dying - Update
by pratt1 infirst, thanks to all for your encouraging posts.. it was exactly what i need to boost my spirits before visiting my friend.
as i expected he was/is in pretty bad shape.
he underwent a procedure right before i arrived that did not seem to have the desired effect.
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evita
pratt1
I'm so amazed that you were able to say just the right thing at such a difficult time.
That is one of the things I most regret when my mom was dying. I was so distraught that I wasn't able to be as comforting as I wanted to be. Every day I think of things I wish I had told her.
It's times like these that we find out what we're made of. Your friend is lucky to have you.
Eva