As i remember sisters were not allowed to leave home except if they were getting married. There was one elder's daughter who left home to live in her own flat and continued to pioneer, but the poor love was totally outcast despite being a pioneer. Generally it was assumed that sisters who moved out were unable to listen to their parents advice and disobedient and head strong and wold come to no good. I hope she got out - her younger sister who I went to school with ended up seriously mentally ill as far as I know.
Crumpet
JoinedPosts by Crumpet
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19
As a single woman she became more independant
by purplesofa inexerpt from 2/1/05 wt is the truth bearing fruit in those you teach?.
consider how another christian was able to help her bible student.
the student was attending meetings and sharing in the ministry and had already expressed a desire to get baptised.
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My JW brother is dating
by jwNOT inha!
a few months ago my jw father and stepmother took me and my kids to a movie (rated g...lol).
anyway my grown jw brother who still lives with them called on their cell phone and he was planning on his "friend" coming over.
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Crumpet
"Roger, if I want to get laid I can think of better places than the kingdom hall to do it."
What a brilliant reply izcool! LMAO
crumpet of the "wouldn't mind getting her oats in a kingdomhall " class.
Jwnot - even after marriage you couldnt be alone with a member of the opposite sex. I had to go with my dad to drop off bible studies who were female to their homes after meetings while my mum put my younger sisters to bed. I think this has a lot to do with my attitude and severe possessiveness today where I get mad if my b/f has to be in a car with another female for work or in the same hotel. He just can't understand it - as he says men are not made to pounce on any woman the second they are alone with them and is offended that my jealousy is not restricted to the young or the pretty but woman who are old enough to be his mother! It is irrational and ridiculous the way we brought up to distrust everyone, ESPECIALLY OURSELVES!
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my life growing up as a JW
by moanzy injust want to share my experience growing up through this organization.
all but one sister are jw.
my other sister was molested by other people who were at the time witnesses.
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Crumpet
Moanzy - you are amongst friends here even if you can't visibly see us - you can read what we write, feel the extension of love and empathy that is so real it makes our time in the Borg ever more sur-real! Live for the future and the difference you can make in your children's lives. It is very sad that their grandparents have decided an organisation run by fault filled men who they will likely never meet is more important than their grans children, but having heard how unsupportive your parent/step parents have been then your children can do a lot better without their misguidance anyway.
They have taken my right to be loved by my parents instead I got watchtower parrots for parents.
And I also wanted to say that you put this brilliantly - it is sort of funny and sort of sad. I wish I was a cartoonist so I could do a picture of a watchtower parrot to make you smile! Anyway welcome to our little island of comfort moanzy.
And To PJWoman - I never fail to feel touched when I see someone like you reach out as you did. I have felt more mothering from women who have nothing to do with JWs that I ever did within the organisation where the older women just seemed to look down on me for my youth and made spiteful comments. Well done on your strength and fortitude in beating cancer and continuing to do your part to help others. I hope you feel moved to contribute on the board again. We could do with more like you - mothers, with big hearts - so many of us, me included, feel like orphans. I wish my mother could have known me as a woman and an adult, but she rejected me before she could see how I would grow and the woman I would become. I think its her loss as much as mine, and I feel so sad for her.
hugs to you both girls!
crumpet
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7
Happy 33rd Freedom Fighter
by Crumpet in.
happy birthday freedom fighter!.
any plans for the day?
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Crumpet
Happy birthday Freedom Fighter!
Any plans for the day?
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26
So How Does Your "Never Been A J Dub" Partner Cope With All Of This?
by Englishman inmine does very well!.
she's astonished at the df'ing thing more than anything else.
she reckons it's all about control and power.
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Crumpet
Can I be the first to welcome the brilliant one Bethelgert?!
Nice for you to stop and come out of the shadows so we can say hello!
Welcome to the board as a visible entity!
crumpet
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26
So How Does Your "Never Been A J Dub" Partner Cope With All Of This?
by Englishman inmine does very well!.
she's astonished at the df'ing thing more than anything else.
she reckons it's all about control and power.
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Crumpet
Englishman - I'd like to, but he has his daughter visiting that weekend and actually I rather fancy checking out you FREAKS myself before inflciting you on him! LOL! What is the date again as I really need to start making arrangements if I am going to come. Half of me wants to and half of me is scared that the conversation (as demonstrated on this board) will be way to high brow for me!
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16
Do your dreams affect your life....
by Crumpet in...or are they just a source of nightly entertainment?
alternatively how directly do your day to day activities insert themselves into your dreams.
the reason i ask is because i had a dream last night which i think might actually be life changing.
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Crumpet
Hey Wednesday
Only just found this lovely post from you and the imaginary Caymans! I am going to try this next time I have a dream - do you mean literally within the dream ask the children what they represent? I love this idea and I do believe vaguely something I read once in book about the aborigines called Mutant Message from Forever that we are part of a collective consciousness and we do have all the answers within ourselves and our dreams are keys to the dilemmas we face in our day to day lives. I am very intrigued and am going to have a look on Google for this theory when I get a chance.
Also can I say that wherever you actually are it is a great comfort and fills me with genuine warmth and joy to know that you have thought of me with compassion. That helps no end - it truly does, so thank you my friend. Its just what I need.
As for therapy I'm sure it would be a good idea but I'm not sure I'm ready for it yet, even if I could afford it. This board is proving excellent therapy and is free! So I want to ride with this and see how I get on in my personal development. If I can make it past 6 months without doing something to hurt myself during moments of stress then to me that will be half the battle won.
((((wednesday))))
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So How Does Your "Never Been A J Dub" Partner Cope With All Of This?
by Englishman inmine does very well!.
she's astonished at the df'ing thing more than anything else.
she reckons it's all about control and power.
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Crumpet
Not very well. Many of our arguments over the years have been religiously focussed and its one subject upon which we've mainly had to avoid discussing or practically come to blows. I thought this would become eaasier following my visits to the board and my gradual acceptance that I was brainwashed which is what he has said all along. However I think he just expects me to have this epiphany and move on and not talk about it anymore, but it doesn't work that way, at least not for me. Part of my recovery is dependent on this board and associating with people who have shared my experiences, traumas, grief, pain, loss and crackpot upbringing.
I want to talk about it with him but he visibly stifffens if I do bring up anything from this board as if I'm stating something glaringly obvious and that I'm stupid for not having realised it sooner.
In some ways I think he preferred me before when he was the only one I could go to for support and I didnt have the Board. I could be wrong, but I can't think of any other reason for his resentment of my time spent on here as I only use it when he is out of the house and I am lonely or at work.
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36
Jehovah's Witness Oddities
by minimus ini now enjoy telling people about the things jehovah's witnesses can and cannot do.
for instance, witnesses can work in a store that sells lottery tickets and tobacco but they can't own the store themselves.....whole blood is forbidden to be transfused yet blood fractions are acceptable.
donating blood in any form is wrong but accepting blood fractions is a conscience matter.........can you think of other jw oddities????
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Crumpet
pratt1 I feared this might be true
however if the parents fall on hard financial times the society will encourage those parents to go to those d'fed children for financial support.
My parents have shunned me since my last DFing in 1998, but I am well aware that they have no pension arrangements having been self employed as a windowcleaner and housewife, they own no property and have no savings beyond what is required for their next holiday. My dad must be getting on for his 60's and retirement age although of course he won't be able to retire - he will just have to come on working and thats going to be kind of difficult as he gets too old to get up and down stairs let alone a set of ladders. I have two sisters who are still good and faithful dubs.
I think if I am approached for financial assistance in years to come (and I am heavily in debt myself thanks to being made to leave home at 16 and support myself with no qualifications so the answer would be NO right now) I might have to make my financial assistance conditional on an intense study of any "apostate" literature I can get my hands on and of course that they stop shunning me with immediate effect. See how they like my "house rules"!
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34
How do you handle a Volitile Ex??
by Seeking Knowledge inmy ex....is an idiot.
i have had problems with him from the get go when it comes to custody of our son.
we have gone to court and established some ground rules, which he consistantly bends & twists to suit him.
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Crumpet
My partner has a 9 year old daughter and her mother really does deserve to be shot! And I have a hard time keeping calm when she sends emails to us which is the only way she communicates. We advised her that the little girl had head lice in December which we treated and took 5 hours going through, but which required a second treatment to fully work. We bought the shampoo gave it to her mother and explained that we'd got over 100 lice out of the child's hair, but that if she could just treat it once over the next two weeks that should resolve the problem.
Two weeks later she had not even checked her daughters hair and the infestment was rife. We are now in March and the child still has lice. As a child I never had lice longer than a week. The mother says that treatments prescribed by doctors do not work and refuses to use them. The little girl says that her mother doesnt have time to do her daughters hair - despite the fact the mother does not work and stays home all day long doing eff all! The mother said she could not understand the point of counting the lice - the point was we wanted to shock her into some action to care for the child. So we spend every weekend mostly just treating the child's hair - not exactly quality time for any of us - only for the daughter to come back with her head crawling again.
So at the end of our tether, my boyfriend said he would have to call social services. The mother said that she would stop contact if he did! I can bearly even think about the situation anymore because it stops me sleeping I get so mad.
The mother has also terrified the child so that she is scared to get on a plane now. Her mother told her that the plane might blow up if she gets on one and also refuses to let us have the child's passport so she cannot come on holiday with us. The child has a panic attack when she has to fly to Scotland with us and says she's too afraid to go any further on a plane even if we could get the passport. What kind of mother poisons their child's mind that way? She doesnt want her to go anywhere or do anything. We've managed to combat together things like fear of swimming and water and parks and slides which her mother has imprinted on her from an early age, but no sooner have we broken down one fear than therev is another one. What child wouldn;t want to go to Disneyland? This one doesn't because her mother told her that there isn't any point in going until you are in your 20's and that it isnt really for children?
So I can fully sympathise with your problem with an ex who appears not to have the child's best interests at heart. You just have to stay calm and take advice from your lawyer. We don't communicate at all except in writing, so at least we have got lots of very freaky emails from this twisted woman to take to court should we choose that path again. Just accumulate any evidence that you can, like someone else said would be my advice.
crumpet x