Posts by particlesnwaves5

75

How Many Reveal Themselves Totally On This Board?

by minimus in

jw
friends

some feel that you should put out a history of who you are, what your life was and is like now and express it in a very simple way so that everyone can "know" you.

we've had posters say they were elders, elder's sisters, hurt jws, etc.

it could all be a little fantasy.

particlesnwaves5

I don't want to reveal everything here. I have things that I want to hide--my identity for one thing. What is wrong with that? People say what do you have to hide something like you are deep, dark and sinister, or perverted,cowardly or something. Maybe a person just wants a little privacy and to vent and talk without worry. I think saying something like that is being unneccessarily judgemental. I don't think it is particularly prudent to reveal names and places on a board as public as this, but I wouldn't judge anybody for it. I would think they have more courage than I have.

Also how many people really want to know the deep intimacies of our lives the first few times we talk to them? I think you reveal more naturally as time goes on as trust is built up.

If a person jumps on a board and right away reveals everything and writes deeply personal stuff, sometimes it means they are looking for a quick fix, instant gratification. I don't think they stay committed. I think it is a very human thing to do and most people have done it at one time or another but it isn't a very satisfying experience, usually.

I think you get more of what you focus on. The more you focus on the positive, the better your relationships with other people and judgementalism melts away.

2

Iquick builds

by kilroy2 in

jw
friends

all the projects i have been with there is always the to many cheifs and no indians routine.

you have people who know nothing trying to take charge.

and opinions like assholes they all got em.. i would not step foot on kh soil if i knew there was a million in gold there for the taking.

particlesnwaves5

>>all you hangers on you are trying to rip off a bandaid slow, do it fast it hurts less and is over sooner. the only thing you have to fear it fear itself to use a fdr ww2 phrase<<

Great metaphor, quote, and points to ponder!

11

Millions Now Living Will Defiantly Die.

by weasel in

jw
friends

my mother passed away in february.

she was a pioneer for 40 years and steadfast in her jw beliefs to the day she died.

i flew to kentucky to find her cold and dead in her bed.

particlesnwaves5

<<The Memorial Service was conducted at a "Kingdom Hall" by a man that sodomized me when I was 8 years old. .>>

Was that a secret? Have you ever told anyone, like your mom? Was anything ever done about it? Anyway if you'd rather not comment on that aspect, I think it would be perfectly understandable.

Just had to ask. I'm sorry you had that experience. Hearing about those kind of things is still so shocking and makes me know how blind and sheltered I have been.

I think there are many JWs that will get much enlightenment when they go through the "veil". I had an elderly relative pass recently. This person was the first to become a witness and was responsible for succeeding generations to become JWs. I think this person may be feeling some kindly regret. Some people who have had near death experiences say that the Light--God--allows all the religions to exist as sort of training schools in ethics. But persons of special discernment usually leave the religions and go on to a deeper spirituality. God is completely compassionate and non-judgemental. Persons of this type begin to see things like God does... I don't know if that is true but I like to think it is. That sort of makes us the lucky ones....

I have had some rough and heartrending experiences in other ways. And it seems I am always surrounded by problematical people. Lately, I do think it some sort of spiritual education. Perhaps your experiences have made you more compassionate, careful, and more empathetic than others who have not experienced such things. Maybe you are a much more protective parent and this quality will be passed on to succeeding generations.

26

The most useless thing you ever purchased

by Nosferatu in

jw
friends

so, what's the most useless thing you ever purchased?

i'm not sure about mine, but for a while i was wanting to buy the "video nag".

it was a $10 vhs tape, featuring 23 minutes of some ugly hag continually bitching.. btw, this is a recycled post.

particlesnwaves5

Some things that are definitely in the running:

prepaid cell phone--rates to keep it on are ridiculous.

sewing machine--who has time to sew?

my last bookbag for witnessing

books on parenting--life has taught me valuable lessons

new clothes, new furniture, etc--I live in a college town, there are numerous used clothing stores (hey once its been washed it looks like it came from a thrift store anyway) and every end of semester there is plenty of free furniture on the curbs around town. (Sidewalk shopping--with a dog and a cat and kids--can't knock it). Also the recycling center has free items people leave for everyone. Shoes a plenty. One time I found a gently used leather satchel, there. Hey how about a new topic on how to live on free stuff!

17

Treating Fibromyalgia with a Serotonin Uptake

by Sentinel in

i've been suffering with fibromyalgia since about 1986, but was not diagnosed until 1997. for the longest time the only course of treatment (since there is no cure) is the use of strong pain killers.

i opted not to take that route.

someone recently posted something on here regarding this malady, and it got me to thinking and doing more research.

particlesnwaves5

I have suffered from fibromyagia for years for the same reasons you stated. Prozac helps depression but I don't think it completely gets rid of the fibromyalgia.

Small doses of Elavil will stop the pain. But they do make me drowsy which I don't like so I save the Elavil for when I can sleep in in the morning. Elavil is relatively cheap too.

Positive affirmations have helped me. I know it sounds weird but when the pain comes I tell my self "I release the need for pain and guilt." over and over and sometimes the pain really does subside. I read somewhere that pain can be the result of guilty feelings. I had some problems with guilt after my husband's death.

I took Zoloft one time. I will never again. It made the pain sssooooo much worse.

I hope your tmt works well!!!!!!!

12

Social Skills/Dating

by particlesnwaves5 in

jw
friends

i have a problem.

i am lonely as can be since leaving the organization.

my children are grown and having lives of their own.

particlesnwaves5

Nosferatu: <<If there's one thing I've learned, it's that you don't need a woman in your life to be happy. Happiness comes from achievement, self-perception, passion, (probably more that I can't think of). One good rule of thumb that I learned is that a woman [man] should ADD happiness to your life, not be the source of it. If you base all your happiness on one person, and that person leaves your life, all that you have built will come crashing down on you, and you're right back where you started. Build happiness on yourself, your achievements, your success, and you'll have no problems. >>

Yes, I think this very true...Thank you. P

12

Social Skills/Dating

by particlesnwaves5 in

jw
friends

i have a problem.

i am lonely as can be since leaving the organization.

my children are grown and having lives of their own.

particlesnwaves5

Donkey:

<<<I am lonely always... >>> Is your real name Eeyore? Sorry, just couldn't resist. I know what loneliness can be like. I think we are all doomed to a certain loneliness until we die. I think it is important to make very good friends with yourself, first. That's the only human each of us can count on to hang around for all time. When we are at peace with ourselves I think we will attract more friends. P

12

Social Skills/Dating

by particlesnwaves5 in

jw
friends

i have a problem.

i am lonely as can be since leaving the organization.

my children are grown and having lives of their own.

particlesnwaves5

Thank you all for your responses and support. It means alot.

I do have a job at a group home. My coworkers are the same sex as me. But I am developing some friends with them. The group home is part of a larger organization. There are a couple of men in this organization I would like to get to know but have felt too shy.

I think I will start going to art classes at the local university.

Is anyone here at this forum interested in creative writing. I think it would be nice if there was a thread or section devoted to creativity.

Again thank you all so much, P

12

Social Skills/Dating

by particlesnwaves5 in

jw
friends

i have a problem.

i am lonely as can be since leaving the organization.

my children are grown and having lives of their own.

particlesnwaves5

I have a problem. I am lonely as can be since leaving the organization. My children are grown and having lives of their own. I would welcome some suggestions on where and how to go about making new friends. A friend at work said it would be good if I "got out more".

I would like to be around others of the opposite sex but I am scared. My witness mate and I had a very heartbreaking breakup. Also, my parents had deep problems. I am afraid of my own instincts about people.

I am a loner by nature but I think I would be happier if I was in a relationship with someone and also developed some good friendships too.

Have you had problems with people wanting sexual intimacy before you were ready?

How have you coped with the loss of social support since leaving the witness religion?

14

A question I can not answer

by spiritwalker in

jw
friends

why is it, with all the money and education in this world.

with all the talent that is brought to the forefront and variety among us.

is there no greater comedy movies then those done by "the three stooges" "laurel and hardy" "abbot and costello" and "charlie chaplin?

particlesnwaves5

There is a pretty good comedy duo nowadays--Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson. I think they are still trying to find their way but they can be very funny together. They were great in several movies like the Royal Tenenbaums and Meet the Parents.

A music video that was pretty funny: with Paul Simon and Chevy Chase. I wish I could remember the song.