since the move, it has been so enjoyable to not have jw's breathing down our necks asking why we didn't make the meeting, or having to pretend to be "spiritual" in front of family all the time.. 90% of my week is virtually stress free.
then, my mom calls or texts wanting to talk to her grandkids.
every dang call, she asks about the new congregation, if we went to the meeting, etc.. why can't i tell her to fk off?
I just want to burn the bridge and be done with it. I have tried so many times to salvage the relationship.
DF her from your family. Announce it to her and explain the reinstatement process and appeal options...
Then shun the hell out of her!!!
( that wasn't nice, but it was fun to say )
so here's my question as a newly daed person that is summarily shunned.
do you hide from family and act like you don't exist or do you let them know you're still here and seek them out?
they want you to be dead, like you no longer exist, because strict avoidance makes it easier on them.
They for the most part, most JWs were never really interested in being my friend.
Token handshakes and "how are you's" are not evidence of "love among yourselves".
Most of the calls or visits away from the KH that I ever received were when someone needed something or wanted me to fill in last minute on some part.
People loved to borrow my tools, car trailers and my time.
They convinced me that we were friends.
After fading for nearly two years, I realized that I was already shunned by near everyone.
They would get uncomfortable when seeing me in a store or somewhere public.
My wife's sisters were about the only hold-out JWs that would speak to me or come visit in our home. Now it's all over.
Now, after being DF'd for about 20 days, I realize fully that it was all just an illusion of "friendship" and "association". No substance. We had "Jehovah" in common.
( that means we agreed to follow the GB and live our lives by their rules )
Very sad realization.
So glad to be out. Got my life back.
any takers?
we can pick a date and pull the plug?
lol .
I could submit my DA letter or a very late J/C appeal.
If anything they'd get a smirk.
Maybe they'd send me a letter stating they DF'd me back on Sept 10th 2015 ( FYI ! )
i'm not sure if this topic has ever been posted (surely, i believe it has), but it would be interesting to revive such a topic and hear your stories!.
when my parents heard my first rant (after they told me to be home schooled when i was caught kissing a girl) they entered into a long depression that continues to this day.
my father suffers knowing his once amazing family is now divided, and my mother is equally angry.
My older than me nephew, ex-elder, ex-pioneer, ex-bethelite, after having a very two hour session of why I'm an apostate, stopped our relationship on the spot.
After ten plus years of regular family visits, trips and what-not he cut me off about a year ago. His family is so dysfunctional and crazy, I'm actually glad to be rid of them.
Sad as that sounds, it is the truth.
This organization makes people choose between their religion and their family.
Lying hypocrites!
No one should be forced to worship in a way that he finds unacceptable or be made to choose between his beliefs and his family.
if an (aggressive) real estate fund is stopping it's operations directly,.
and if an publishing house is minimize the portfolio,.
and if a member of it's board of directors is telling the costs are higher then the profits,.
I think there is very good chance that the top, all long time or born-in JWs, really believe YHWH is guiding them. They are "all in".
They are finding that this is not the case, and confusion is setting in, paving the way for the mass exodus from Watchtower. Sadly, I expect some long time bethelites, DOs or COs, special pioneers, missionaries will commit suicide after they learn that it was all a for profit ( not prophet ) cult. This truly worries me.
It may start slow, but will gather momentum when WTS leadership enters prison, is paying millions in lawsuits, goes bankrupt or all of the above.
Many of our old "friends" will need our help and comfort after years of them shunning us. I'll forgive the humble...
hello, lurkers and curious.
i imagine you're reading this because either you think you can defend your beliefs victoriously or you have doubts.. i have 2 questions that i hope you can log in and answer (no one will know who you are unless you tell them or leave your page open for others to see).
1. what actual worship did you do at the meetings or gatherings?.
Excellent topic.
Even if none respond, they will certainly realize that they are unable.
It is a club and the worship is superficial.
One the first lie is confirmed, it's over for being a JW.
I hate that they lied to us. What a waste of time...
sorry for the length of this, i hope anyone stopping by to read will take the time and read it.
i haven't included any things i would consider "apostate" specifics about doctrines, or major scandals.
it's just a general layout of the path i took to becoming an exjw.
Thanks for the experience.
Many components rang true with mine.
When you realize you've been duped, it's very hard to deny it any more.
Overlapping Generations instead of "Millions Now Living Will Never Die" started the ball rolling for me.
I also was inactive and resigned as a MS before I got the "courage" to look at "apostate web sites" on the internet. This is interesting and ties into the idea of information control or prohibition or certain things. When in field service, we were expected to converse with anyone and everyone. ( apostates live in the territories ) The only time we would turn away was if the householder said they were DF'd or apostate. So scary!!
Now I'm DF'd for "admitted apostasy".
( local legend )
My advice to all that are unsure what to do: stay home and research.
If you can no longer convince yourself that it's "the truth", then quit.
Hardest decision. Best outcome.
i was feeling particularly hopeless about the whole jws being assholes thing and sick to death of pretending so ....
i rang my sister and told her that i no longer believe jws have the truth and the phone went silent, when i asked her to say something she just said if that was the case then she would have to hang up on me and then proceeded to indeed hang up..
so i texted her back immediately with fu..
One of the nut case elderz that tried to "encourage me" really went the extra mile.
He sent me one text- "miss you, bro"
Shepherding...
there were many addressed to me.
for example, i once had a sister tell me i was gambling because i liked playing skill crane (the machine where you have to try to pick up prizes like stuffed animals) at the arcade.
i then fired back a her: "you saw the r-rated movie 'backdraft.
I was doing the stage mic adjustments at the circuit assemblies.
I was thrown off the stage by the CO for my shoes. Not shiny enough.
They were black suede shoes that I wore to all my local public talks and service assignments.
Being the lunatic dub that I was, I went out into the audience and found a friend of mine.
We swapped shoes and I was back on the roster!
Never mind that shoes can not be seen from the audience at the Fairfield Assembly hall in Northern Cal.
I would later use this pharisaic knowledge to my benefit.
I was already waking up, still a MS, getting confused and learning TTATT.
Don't want to do the stage anymore and just sit in my seat and space out?
No problem... Instead of wearing my CO approved matching pants and jacket suit, I wore a sport coat and slacks. <thrown off the stage>
All down hill from there...
i was feeling particularly hopeless about the whole jws being assholes thing and sick to death of pretending so ....
i rang my sister and told her that i no longer believe jws have the truth and the phone went silent, when i asked her to say something she just said if that was the case then she would have to hang up on me and then proceeded to indeed hang up..
so i texted her back immediately with fu..
I'm glad you made the move toward personal freedom.
You will forever wish you did it sooner. I know I do.
People are leaving and it is for all the right reasons.
