Do Must Dubs Have Pre-Marital Sex?

by tall penguin 64 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • Bstndance
    Bstndance

    My mom and step-father did.

    I was 11 and they were only dating for a couple of months when all of the sudden my mom sat my brother and I down and asked if we would still follow the "truth" if she were to be disfellowshiped. (I should have taken the out right then) A week later she was only reproved and my soon to be step father was disfellowshiped. A few weeks after he was reinstated, they got married.

    It took a few years for me to realize what happened. Being 11 at the time I didn't but 2 and 2 together. Later on I found out he was disfellowshiped because he was a repeat offender. Apparently, before he met my mother, he slept with his landlady a non-jw. I don't know what gets into these people to go and tell the elders.

  • hartstrings
    hartstrings

    I ditto your last four sentences thorn. Knowing what I know now, for my own mental state, I would never have casual sex. The emotional element for me is too strong in that type of relationship. If my daughters (still too young for this subject) decided to have sex while in a committed relationship, I would be fine with that and would make sure that they had the necessary protection, etc. I hope that this kind of middle-of-the-road attitude works for us.

  • OldSoul
    OldSoul
    I don't know what gets into these people to go and tell the elders.

    An abundance of guilt. Being a Jehovah's Witness is like being a Catholic without the benefit of absolution. "You feel like crap? Good, that's you're supposed to feel, you good fer nothing slave.Back to the field, and don't you dare miss a meeting or we may have to reconsider just reproving you." To be fair, most don't present it quite that way. But I believe the feeling you get from it is described very well. Freedom? OldSoul

  • Soledad
    Soledad

    I strongly suspect that they do. The one's that didn't were the one's that had the shortest engagements--this one couple I knew announced their engagement in September and got married very shortly after that, must have been late October or early November.

    Then again, maybe they were trying to hide the belly? The woman gave birth the following year in June. Hmmmmm........

  • ballistic
    ballistic

    This is what I was d/f for.

    My wife confessed it along with her affairs she'd had.

    I was told that I would be d/f even though I was repentent because "I had had 2 years in which to confess"

    while others have been told,

    "it was so long ago, don't worry about it"

  • tfsm
    tfsm

    The only ones I grew up with that didn't have sex were so unattractive they couldn't get laid in a whorehouse with a handful of hundred dollar bills. I'll share something personal here because in retrospect it is kind of funny- the first time I had sex was in the back seat of a car when the sisters and I were supposed to be "in service". I'm pretty sure I counted those hours. It makes me all misty-eyed and nostalgic just thinking about it.

  • Legolas
    Legolas
    I'll share something personal here because in retrospect it is kind of funny- the first time I had sex was in the back seat of a car when the sisters and I were supposed to be "in service".

    How many of you where having sex?

  • Doubtfully Yours
    Doubtfully Yours

    I wouldn't say most, but a pretty large group does.

    And, NO, these couples never come clean about it and go on to have weddings in the KH as if they were morally clean.

    People aren't stupid, though. Most other JWs know when a couple has gotten too familiar with one another, ahem, if you know what I mean.

    I told you all before about this young couple that got married last year in one of the local congregations. I knew it, just knew it that they're having pre-marital sex but of course couldn't prove it. Sure enough, 6 1/2 months later here comes a beautiful 10 lbs. baby boy. Of course the family all said the baby was born prematurely. YEAH RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    The father elder and the mother pioneer both lost their privileges because it was determined that they knew of the pre-marital sex but covered it just to have the daughter have a lavish KH wedding with all the trimmings.

    Time has passed and everybody is back reinstated to their privileges and everybody is one big happy family once again.

    DY

  • Soledad
    Soledad
    Sure enough, 6 1/2 months later here comes a beautiful 10 lbs. baby boy. Of course the family all said the baby was born prematurely. YEAH RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    ROTFL!! A 10lb premature baby!!

    How much would that baby had weighed if he was uh, "full-term"??

  • joelbear
    joelbear

    blondie, excellent observation. their minds have been adapted to fear disfellowshipping as the rod, not destruction or the obscure "displeasing god" as punishment.

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