What's Your View of Spanking (Children)?

by minimus 83 Replies latest jw friends

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  Mary

  I saw a great example of the debate on spanking on CNN a while ago, when the teachers in an Atlanta public school had to call the police because a grade 6 kid was acting up so bad and wouldn't behave (no she wasn't mental---just an undisciplined brat) and of course the teachers aren't allowed to touch the kids anymore. So the cops came and the student continued to act out her tantrum so the cop finally handcuffed her. Naturally the parents are going to sue the school and the cops and everyone else under the sun.
  

  One guy emailed CNN and said: "...One time when I misbehaved in school, the teacher walloped me and sent me to the Principal's Office who called my father who came down and walloped me again. Guess who never misbehaved in school again?"
  

  While there are other forms of discipline, I think spanking is necessary in some cases. I see kids throwing a soul-piercing screaming tantrum in the middle of the Mall while the parents stand there with a stunned look on their face and do nothing. We would have never dreamed of throwing a tantrum anywhere, because we would've been walloped right then and there.
  

  Equating spanking with beating a child is like equating kissing with intercourse. Yes there are other methods of discipline and parents should definitely use them, but when that doesn't work, a spanking usually will.
• 

  Sara Annie

  Insomniac, I am so sorry for the abuse you suffered at the hands of the man who should have been your protector. I hope you have been able to find some peace and healing. I can understand, given your experience, your zero tolerance policy.

  However I can easily answer this question:

  Therefore, when I hear about people hitting their kids, I have zero tolerance. Maybe it starts out as a swat on the fanny, but where do you draw the line?

  Well, I draw it right there. The issue is all about knowing where to draw the line. Not everyone has the sadistic personality and lack of self control that makes the transition from a rare 'swat on the fanny' to the kind of torture you endured inevitable or even remotely likely.

  Especially in situations where a child's safety is at stake, all the misdirection and reasoning in the world will not always make a child who is unable to meaninfgully process that kind of discipline act appropriately. When my son, at three, made his SECOND purposeful break in one afternoon away from my hand in a parking lot with a gleam of mischief in his eye, it was obvious to me that the stern reprimand and time out he'd received the first time was simply not effective, and was not going to deter him from acting in a manner that risked his life. That solitary swat on the fanny was the form of discipline that resulted in behavior that ensured he would not endanger his life yet again when eye contact and stern reasoning were unsuccessful. Those without self control or who simply enjoy inflicting pain are in a different class than those who can effectively employ that occasional 'swat on the fanny'.
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  LouBelle

  Well I was one of those children that got spanked & pretty often too. Never beaten up but some were severe - my last hiding was at the age of 17. And I turned out pretty well.

  I think one has to be very careful if you are going to be spanking - overdoing it won't accomplish much except the child might hate you. Sometimes a spanking is called for - the adult should be able to control him/herself. And then at times chastisement or grounding is.

  I kinda look at this generation where the child starts 'screaming' abuse because of one hiding. It's pathetic!!!!!!! With everything in life - if you do something wrong there is a consequence and a price that needs to be paid - if we rear our children up to be pathetic little whimps *shrug* that have no sense of responsibility, there aint much hope for the human race.
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  mrsjones5

  I think some parents need to stop being wimpy with their kids. Saying no to a child is not going to stunt them for life. Giving a child boundries (me adult you child) is not going to make them hate you. Enforcing rules is not going to give a child low self esteem.

  When my kids want to do something with their friends that seems a bit dubious I give them the out of telling their friends "my mom says I cant". I tell them to blame it on me if they want to save face with their friends and quite frankly I think it makes my kids (esp my oldest boy) feel better that their mom cares enough about them to be here and not let them do stupid stuff. Though I realize I cant always be there to stop all of the stupid stuff.
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  minimus

  Insomniac, YOU were an abused child. It sounds like the elders felt it was out of their hands, so to speak. You daddy should've been locked up in a state hospital.
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  Rayvin

  I was spanked real hard as a child. A swat for each word "Dont you ever do that again ......"etc. Mom even told me that she would stop when I cried so she would know that it got through to me. All that I got was upset at being hurt so bad by my mother that is supposed to love me. Oh.. and she used a belt and was swinging at my butt. Sometimes the buckle would get me cause I would be running around the room to get away from her.

  I would never do as she does. Spank that much w/ that much force and doing so out of anger. I rarely swat my kids on the hand or hiney. But I do and my dad laughs at me for it cause he says its not a spanking.

  My girls are very smart and sharp tongued at times. If I take away toys etc.. they just ask " So .. when am i getting it back".. Time - outs don't work.. but I still use them. My youngest actually has asked for swats versus time-out since its over quicker..lol

  My oldest has been lying and trying to get her sis in trouble and writing down 100 times -I will not Lie- didn't work so I gave her a dirty job for when she lied again - she had to clean up dog poopy from the back yard w/ a pooper scooper and gloves and a trash bag. - I am trying everything other then spanking.

  Some claim the job of pooper scooper is wrong to do as well. Something has to work. If I say "no TV for a week" they are fine reading books and playing toys and making a mess in their room. If I say no toys the just read or go outside and play. If I say no going outside they just take a nap. UGH!!!
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  Cygnus

  I just wanted to say that my father hated spanking us kids, but he did so 'cause he felt JWs/the Bible told him to do so. How terrible, to allow other men to make you do something you feel strongly against. Not just terrible, it is immoral. Edited to clarify: My dad wasn't knowingly acting immoral, I attribute the immorality to the JWs that told him through the pages of the Watchtower to not spare the rod.
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  hibiscusfire

  Mary: I saw a great example of the debate on spanking on CNN a while ago, when the teachers in an Atlanta public school had to call the police because a grade 6 kid was acting up so bad and wouldn't behave (no she wasn't mental---just an undisciplined brat) and of course the teachers aren't allowed to touch the kids anymore. So the cops came and the student continued to act out her tantrum so the cop finally handcuffed her. Naturally the parents are going to sue the school and the cops and everyone else under the sun.

  One guy emailed CNN and said: "...One time when I misbehaved in school, the teacher walloped me and sent me to the Principal's Office who called my father who came down and walloped me again. Guess who never misbehaved in school again?"

  While there are other forms of discipline, I think spanking is necessary in some cases. I see kids throwing a soul-piercing screaming tantrum in the middle of the Mall while the parents stand there with a stunned look on their face and do nothing. We would have never dreamed of throwing a tantrum anywhere, because we would've been walloped right then and there.

  Equating spanking with beating a child is like equating kissing with intercourse. Yes there are other methods of discipline and parents should definitely use them, but when that doesn't work, a spanking usually will

  Well said Mary!!!!!

  Hibiscusfire
• 

  hibiscusfire

  Stevenyc - That sure is one NASTY book, that Bible!

  Pity it doesn't take into account the fact that there are a lot of BAD mothers and fathers out there! I wonder what we're supposed to do with them. Let's look at our Bibles at....what....no scripture telling us how to treat parents who mistreat, abuse, brutalize their children. Dear me

  GILL SHUT UP!!!! YOU ARE TOO IGNORANT FOR WORDS!

  Hibiscusfire
• 

  Gill

  Hibiscusfire - What are you going to do if I don't shut up - spank me with your Bible?!

  Regards

  Gill