Attn Unbeleiving Mates (ubm's): "I'm a dub! I'm right! Join or who cares!"

by Check_Your_Premises 71 Replies latest jw friends

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    Serious question here, defd. Is there anything in those Watchtowers or Awakes on how the JW partner is to deal with the emotional strain of living in a mixed marriage, other than meeting attendance, book study and field service?

  • defd
    defd

    Jgnat

    Im sure if you research on the Library you would find alot of info. You do have the Library on cd?

  • carla
    carla

    defd,

    I've seen the wt stuff on marriage as well. "If all you wives would just become submissive in everything, there would be no problems". That's it in a nutshell. Besides what is said in the wt is not what is said or implied at the hell. When you have an org that is trying to keep people from seeing nonjw's wether that be by keeping them so busy in meetings and such, or by flat out telling them not to see nonjw's how are they supposed to have a relationship with anyone?

    When elders hint that a spouse may be a 'spiritual endangerment', what the hell do you think that means? Here, we can find an excuse for you to leave your spouse and put God's name on it! Lucky you. Then you can feel free to marry a nice dub. If someones spirituality can be so easily 'endangered' what does that tell you about their spirituality to begin with? Think there may be a problem here?

    When a jw is in a situation like this what are the people at the hell doing asking them to parties and such? Just another way to keep them from their family! It is indecent! As an example, we had an employee with a new baby who had problems, we didn't dream of asking him to work alot of overtime and saturdays. Why? His wife and child needed him home. What would the hell tell someone in that situation? Probably to go to more meeting, and out trying to sell more magazines, you will feel so much better.

    Defd, how can you read all the pain caused by the org and not be affected by it? It amazes me. How can you truly justify all you see here? Especially when most of what is handed down from the wt is not biblical at all. Especially the destruction of relationships and families.

    Why are these jw/non jw marriages not allowed to do real research together? I see it all the time. Don't you see it only reinforces the non jw view that the org is trying to hide something from it's members?

    rant over, carla

  • TheListener
    TheListener

    Nice letter CYP. I'm coming late to the thread.

    I especially like the way it's really non-confrontation about her beliefs. It definitely get the point across that you just want your emotions, feelings and thoughts heard. That your relationship is built on more than either of you trying to convert the other.

    I don't know what's worse, marrying as both dubs and one of you leaving the truth or marrying as non-dubs and one of you becoming a dub. Both situations stink.

    In time I may need to give a letter very similar to this to my mate.

    I hope a marriage can survive one mate being a dub and the other not knowing what to do spiritually.

  • Check_Your_Premises
    Check_Your_Premises

    Hey pistoff.

    I totally agree. Everytime they talk about ubm's at the hall I just bristle. My wife knows how much I despise that!

    I believe in God. I just don't believe in them or any other man. That is scriptural by the way defd.

    When I use it here, imagine me rolling my eyes so hard they are popping out the back of my head, and I my words are just dripping with as much sarcasm as I can possibly muster.

    I guess it is like how black people call eachother the n-word. It takes away from the power of the word. Turn the insult into a source of pride.

    Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaassup my UBM! My UBM's in da hoooooooooooooooooooouse!

  • defd
    defd

    I've seen the wt stuff on marriage as well. "If all you wives would just become submissive in everything, there would be no problems". That's it in a nutshell.

    I politely disagree with you on this. I have also read alot of what the WT publishes on marraiges. It gives EQUAL counsel. Both the husband and the wife.

    When elders hint that a spouse may be a 'spiritual endangerment', what the hell do you think that means? Here, we can find an excuse for you to leave your spouse and put God's name on it!

    When that does happen for NO REASON, it is a shame. But by no means, do the pages of the watchtower endorse that kind of treatment.

    Defd, how can you read all the pain caused by the org and not be affected by it? It amazes me. How can you truly justify all you see here?

    Carla in all honesty, I have been affected by it and I truely believe it is not the Org. thats doing it. It is the PEOPLE within the Individual Congregations who are doing all the hurting. I have been hurt by some myself. You ask me how I justify it? My TRUE feelings are this: The bible fortold it would happen for 1. I dont try to justify it. I just roll with it. Knowing that those things WILL happen. I do my best to focus on doing Jehovahs will and Loving Jesus. I dont let what others do DICTATE what I am supposed to DO.

    Why are these jw/non jw marriages not allowed to do real research together? I see it all the time. Don't you see it only reinforces the non jw view that the org is trying to hide something from it's members?

    I am not aware of any rule like that. It would be a great Idea for the two mates to do research together.

  • Finally-Free
    Finally-Free
    Well, I am a believer in God. It insults me every time I hear it, it is so *unbelievably* arrogant.

    This in itself would make an excellent topic. I'm ashamed at the way I used to treat my father simply because he didn't accept the Watchtower's interpretations of scripture - though he too was a believer in God. I really wish he lived long enough to see me make my exit.

    W

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    I do have the CD, defd, but you are the one who is claiming the Watchtower provides good advice. The burden of proof is yours. Now, exercise those research muscles!

  • carla
    carla

    I am not aware of any rule like that. It would be a great Idea for the two mates to do research together.

    You mean they would be allowed to research non jw material? Oh please! Are you allowed to? I'm not even talking about C of C here. Even library books with history do not seem to be allowed.

    When you say it is not the org doing these things but individuals, who do you think the org is made up of? Can you even name one leader in Brooklyn today? The men in Brooklyn are your leaders. Because if you are going to say jhvh is your leader then, you must explain all, the what you will want to call 'mistakes'. How could jhvh make a mistake?

    The whole point is the wt does do everything in it's power to destroy marriages and families. And they attempt to use God's name in the process. Disgraceful! Blasphemous!

    I have found people in my situation have the same problem. We ares supposed to 'understand' the wt and it's godless doctrines, yet the jw spouse will not take 5 seconds in trying to understand the non jw beliefs. They simply assume that what the wt tells them about so called 'Christendom' is fact. They never check for themselves. Most non jw spouses you see here have read reams of info on jw's. Do you honestly think a jw would read one book about Christians or whatever? How would they even have time? The wt requires on average about 3000 pages of wt literature reading per year with only about 200 of actual Bible reading per year. Do you think the scales are tipped a bit there?

    just disgusted by this truly Godless organization,

    carla

  • kls
    kls
    It would be a great Idea for the two mates to do research together.

    defd,i assume you are talking only about wt lit, because you know ,as you should being a jw as i once was that research outside the jw cult in not allowed.

    Good thoughts Carla

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