by Lehaa 42 Replies latest social relationships
thanks all for your input.
I know it's easy to pretend your something your not on the net.
For all i know he could be married with 6 kids. LOL, sorry baby.
we chat all the time and talk on msn audio, which is great.
My gut is givving me great vibes athe moment, no red flags.
Hope it continues that way
EvilForce,
Congradulations!!
As for cyber sex/relationships I've always chuckled when someone I know got involved with a relationship like that. I was really surprised when some of those relationships ended up working out. I tried cyber sex once and I could not stop laughing after he told me he was getting some lotion and saying this oh baby crap. I just could not stop laughing. Tears came to my eyes I was laughing so much. I pissed him off and really turned him off. He called me tease and bitch. LOL
(((Leeha)))
I've found that relationships can take on another sort of chemistry as it advances. anyone can formulate articulate thoughts in text, but talking on the phone, much less in person, shows several different sides.
If you can adjust or enjoy that change, things look good.
thanks evilforce.
a tease and a bitch he say's. We can all be one of those, isn't that what attracts a lot of men.
Badger, I totally agree, relationships grow and change all the time. I ;m a flexible and easy going kind of person who is not affraid of change at all. I love all stages of a relationship, exactly the same was that I adore each stage of my childrens life. I'm happy just to sit back and enjoy the ride.
Lehaa,
Cyber relationships are one thing... and even meeting in person.
You mentioned though that you are both from differing countries. That's where red flags went off, for me.
I see that you are in Australia. If... for example... the person you are cybering with, is in the States (U.S.A.), and you both are interested in each other, you will have a mountain to climb to be together Two mountains - if children are involved.
If you are thinking of coming to the states to be with him, you will need to get a special permission. If he is thinking of moving there - he will need a special 'skillset' that is in demand there - and he cannot be too old - to be desireable to Australia.
Basically, you will need to get married to this person.
There are all sorts of stories about folks who have done this - and succeeded... and also ones that have failed. (Long Distance Relationships are difficult.)
When kids are involved... it gets even worse. Australia will not let you take them out of the country - unless the other person - your ex - signs all sorts of papers. It can get messy at this point.
Lehaa, there are forums for Aussies - with this very situation - who post regularly - and you might do well to sign up with one or two of them. I used to belong to one of them... but that was so long ago... I do not even know how to point you to get you there.
I apologize if I sound so negative. I really wish you well... but I have been down that road - and learned a lot from that experience.
Good Luck... and I hope you don't put too many plans together before you investigate your options available to you.
Regards,
Jim TX
Thanks Jim,
Don't worry about the negativity, it's the reality of the situation and I'm enough of a realist to understand all that you said.
The same thought have been going through my mind as well.
I have no intention of trying to move my kids out of the country and have no intention of leaving them. It's not fair on them or their father, plus I love Australia too much to leave it.
As far as them moving here, we'll come to that rurdle when we get to it. Both of us do want to get remarried but are not about to jump into things with out eyes closed.
Australia is just about to ease it's immigration laws again as they have a need for skilled workers, so hopefully that will go in out favour. He's also from a country that Australia is happy to have people immigrate from, so that's a plus for us too.
Thanks for your thoughts and I will check up on those forums when the time comes, for now it's real early days, were just enjoying the close friendship for the time.
Thanks
Lehaa.
I might be naive, but I think that meeting someone on the internet is just as good as anywhere else. We can't deny that the internet is part of our lives. Many people who used to go to a bar in order to meet someone, now turn to the internet to do so. However, I did read somewhere that 53% of guys who hang out in chat rooms are married. But JWD is not a chat room, nor a dating site. I'd rather trust someone I meet on JWD than someone I meet in a chat room for some reason. (hmm.. I don't go to chat rooms.. oh well).
Please take this from me. The distance can and will be a problem,. you have my word on that. I don't mean to discourage you, but I have had an oversees relationship. (I was in Europe and he was in America). I can't tell you how much time and money both of us spent flying back and forth every other month. Then comes the moment of saying goodbye over and over again, and feeling terrible. But time and distance are relative, no doubt. The biggest problem imho lies in the difference in background and culture. It is something that should not be underestimated because this difference seeps through every little thing, I can guarantee this.
might be naive, but I think that meeting someone on the internet is just as good as anywhere else. We can't deny that the internet is part of our lives. Many people who used to go to a bar in order to meet someone, now turn to the internet to do so. However, I did read somewhere that 53% of guys who hang out in chat rooms are married. But JWD is not a chat room, nor a dating site. I'd rather trust someone I meet on JWD than someone I meet in a chat room for some reason.
I agree, I've met guys face to face before and they were great, then slowly they showed there true side.(especially once you married them)
And at least on the net you arn't going to get drunk, get picked up and regret it the next morning .
I've had chat's with guys on line (from this site, and still in the org) who were married and were propoisitioning me. One guy was really bad.
At least with JWD you can read their posts and check out their stories, get to know them a lot better than just chatting. It becomes a bit more 3 dimensional.
If it wasn't for the internet I wouldn't have met half the great guys I have. I have only had one "bad experience" but have had 10 good ones. I'll take that over a bar room pickup anyday of the week. My biggest turn on is a sense of humor, great eyes, and a warm smile. Of course killer abs, and a nice butt is nice too, but I digress.
As long as you take it slowly.....emailing, then move on to phone calls, then maybe a couple of dates in a neutral place like a coffee shop, or meet at the movie theaters....then start meeting each other at home. Nothing is 100% but this way I'd say you have a 95% chance of meeting "the right one".
If it wasn't for the internet I wouldn't have met half the great guys I have. I have only had one "bad experience" but have had 10 good ones. I'll take that over a bar room pickup anyday of the week. My biggest turn on is a sense of humor, great eyes, and a warm smile
mee too.
Really don't like the idea of meeting guys in bars, don't mind hanging out there with friends though.
10:1 ain's bad odds, i'd bet on them.
Eyes , humour and eyes make me melt too.
