i told my mother that i do not desire to be associated with jws anymore and (page 2)

Scully

It sounds like your mom is going to need some kind of counselling once she's released from the hospital. People who are in their right mind do not go ballistic and smack their adult children around and take handfuls of aspirin in a suicide attempt when those same adult children start making adult decisions about their lives.

This is classic control and manipulation behaviour that domestic abusers employ. Has she always been this way when you didn't do what she wanted?

Personally, I think you should get out while she's in the hospital and never look back. Maybe even talk to the police about filing an assault charge on her. If you've got any bruises or scratches from her beating up on you, get a friend to take pictures, or go to the ER and get them to do it. They can be used as evidence to support your charges. Make sure the cops know that she kicked your ass for not wanting to be a JW anymore. If you really want to make her life miserable, you could take your charges to the elders and get her reproved for physical violence, and say that her behaviour toward you makes "living in the world" very attractive compared to "staying In The Truth?". Then tell the elders that you reported the abuse to the police and that you told them that the beating was because you told her you didn't want to be a JW anymore. They really hate it when someone Brings Reproach on Jehovah?.

Her behaviour is inexcusable. Don't coddle her and let her get away with it. You can love someone without allowing them to abuse you.

Love, Scully

cheeseman

I was never in the same position as yourself. My family was never raised JW style. However, when I began my bible study I remember thinking how my family were going to die at armageddon. Feelings ranged from sad, paranoid to angry that they were so selfish as not to study with me and save themselves.

They never changed, they never apologised...just lived their lives as normal outside of the organisation. Eventually those feelings I had about them faded. It took a long time and many an argument. But in the end I saw their point of view. It's important that you don't over-react to her over-reaction. Be cool, be upbeat, positive...and have purpose. Show her you have a goal and that you are happy. She may never agree with you but in the end she'll get over it and calm down. Good luck.

trevor

drunkenpikachu

Her behaviour is inexcusable.

I would like to be supportive of your mother and suggest that you win her with kindness but unfortunately I can't. I agree with Scully and her suggestions. Your mother is a bully who will only change when people stand up to her. My mother was the same so I stood up to her and then left home at 17.

I would point out to your mother that one of your concerns is that if you were to stay a Jehovah?s Witness, then you are worried that you could end up as violent and narrow minded as she is. If that?s what ?mental regulating? by the WT does you don?t want to know.

I hope it all works out for you, you have your whole life ahead and the pain of leaving now is still better than leaving after you have wasted half your life.

tijkmo

what is it with mothers....fathers rarely act this way or have so much influence over us...must be the carrying for nine months and caring and nurturing...not decrying that in any way...just that a more rational response could get a more positive reaction whereas the screaming attacking pillpopping approach just makes you think ...wow made the right choice....

she may also think that your decision means she will not see you again...so reassure her that you still want her association and if that doesnt happen then it will be her decision

your mother recognizes all your desperate displays
and she watches as her babies drift violently awaycounting crows-recovering the satellites

Dragonlady76

This is classic control and manipulation behaviour that domestic abusers employ. Has she always been this way when you didn't do what she wanted?

Right on Scully!

I am very sorry to hear about your situation, but I think your mother is trying to manipulate you. Please don't fall for it. All you can do is tell her that you love her and that religion will not change your love for her , also reminder her that your an adult and as such you can make your own decisions.

Dragonlady76

new boy

Sounds like my Mother.

I did everything she wanted me to do, and she still hated my guts.

Think of the type of people this religion attracts? Nut cases!

People who can't wait for god to KILL everyone {but them} on the planet. So THEY can then be happy.

Your choice?

Stay, and both you and your mother can be unhappy. Or leave.

NB

trevor

New Boy

I have read your biography and you have had a rough deal. Your above observations are so true.

I hope you have found a measure of happiness now.

josephus

you are having a hard time.

pray about it.

if you do it tends to help. it did for me.

my mum was the same, now 5 years later, she has left the jws and so have my family and many of my friends. it takes time, and guts.

ill be thinking about you.

josephus

Mastodon

I'm dreading my mom's ill-fated visit to San Antonio. Thing will get pretty ugly. The things I'm planning to tell her will either drive her out of the borg or make her shun me completely...

Mastodon

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i told my mother that i do not desire to be associated with jws anymore and

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