Staying awake during the Watchtower study

by drahcir yarrum 45 Replies latest jw friends

  • Scorpion
    Scorpion

    How to stay AWAKE! during the Watchtower study.

    1.Loudly clear your throat every 4 or 5 minutes

    2.Play footsy with the person sitting beside you or in front of you.

    3. Put the latest copy of Playboy inside the Watchtower magazine during the study. Make sure you don't let anyone sitting beside you see it. YA RIGHT!

    4.Eat at Taco Bell before the study.

    5.Raise your hand to every question asked whether you know the answer or not. If called upon and are not sure, make something up.

    6.Continually wink at the conductor.

    7.Pick your nose and make pig noises.

    8.Keep standing up and yelling AMEN!

    9.Go to the bathroom every five minutes

    10.Bring a YOYO.

    11.Bring an Etcho-Sketch.

    12.Bring a Laptop and read the posts on this site. Make sure you share what you read after the meeting.

    13.Thirteen is an unlucky number, we will skip this one.

    14.Dress exactly like Charles Taze Russell and keep exclaiming loudly that what is being taught are lies.

    15.Dress like Joseph Rutherford and bring a thermos full of booze to the study.

    16.Bring a jar full of wasps and let them loose during the study.

    17.Bring a few live mice and let them loose during the study.

    18.Bring some apostates and let them loose during the study.

  • Simon
    Simon

    Take a Pocket PC & mobile phone so that you can surf the evil internet

  • somebody
    somebody

    19. Fantasize about the person sitting in front of you, behind you, on either side of you, or all of the them.

    It makes the hour fly by real fast!

    peace,
    somebody

  • ozziepost
    ozziepost

    The best way to stay awake is to participate, sharing encouraging comments.

    Now, seriously, I know someone, and he's a regular in this place, who's made it a practice to litsen to the cricket Test matches on his personal radio during the Watchtower study. He never falls alseep!

    Cheers,
    Ozzie

    "You can know the law by heart, without knowing the heart of it"
    Philip Yancey, What's So Amazing About Grace?

  • ozziepost
    ozziepost

    BTW wot's it like having two given names, Murray?
    Welcome aboard the board!
    Cheers,
    Ozzie

    "You can know the law by heart, without knowing the heart of it"
    Philip Yancey, What's So Amazing About Grace?

  • zev
    zev

    somebody said:

    19. Fantasize about the person sitting in front of you, behind you, on either side of you, or all of the them.

    dang.
    you figured me out. I've been doing that for decades.
    It does help pass the time. I always try to imagine whats being worn underneath the sisters "modest" attire. I have to admit, some of the elders wives are and can be far from modest. And i wont even get into the elders wife who occasionaly "hits" on me. sheeesh. if i didnt have a concience..[bad sp]

    That and a good nap.

    and richard asked

    On a serious note, how difficult is it for those of you still attending Witness meetings regularly when you know it is NOT the truth?

    I turn myself off. I dont have a choice at the moment but to do this, i go and turn off. i have to. listening to lies perpatrated from the pratform as "truth" makes me so damn mad that if i dont turn off, i'll hurl.


    __
    Zev
    The greatest consistancy of the WTBTS is their INconsistancy.

  • joelbear
    joelbear

    Passing the time.

    1. See how many words you can make out of the letters in the year text. You can only use the letters that are there.

    2. Try to guess which section of the audience will be called on for the next answer.

    3. Try to guess the letter that appears the most times in the next paragraph.

    4. Follow all the cute husky brothers to the bathroom.

    Leoj

  • Maximus
    Maximus

    Just wanted to tell you how delighted I am to see you posting.

    Warmest regards,
    Maximus

  • slipnslidemaster
    slipnslidemaster
    4.Eat at Taco Bell before the study.

    ahahahahaha

    SBD!!!

    Slipnslidemaster: "In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends. "
    - Martin Luther King Jr.

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    Hmm I used to count ceiling tiles, count people wearing a certain color, count how many times the brother conducting the study said Ummm or err or what ever or did up or undid his jacket, make a tally sheet of how many times some people got called on or how often they had their hand up........

    and the best -- learned sign language so I could interpert and then didn't have to think at all

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