Studying

by tattoogrl333 42 Replies latest jw friends

Yerusalyim

Tatoo,
It is possible to be DF'd yourself for talking to a DF'd person. As to your appearance, when and if you start going to meetings there will slowly but surely be pressur eput upon you to conform to the norm of the congregation. If you don't you'll be viewed as spiritually weak and though not shunned, you'll be avoided have no priveleges, etc.
Start asking the hard questions. Get info from both sides. Get Ray Franz's books, "Crisis of Conscience" and "In Search of Christian" Freedom
YERUSALYIM
"Vanity! It's my favorite sin!"
[Al Pacino as Satan, in "DEVIL'S ADVOCATE"]
riz

tatt,
When you were a JW and someone was disfellowshipped did you talk to them afterwards???
If you are an active JW and you associate with a disfellowshipped person, in the eyes of the witnesses, you are 'sharing in their bad works' and you will be disfellowshipped too.
It sounds harsh and bizarre. That's because it is harsh and bizarre.
Please take heed of the warnings you are receiving here. If you go through with baptism, wave goodbye to your pink hair, facial piercings (if you have any), even funky shoes. My friend was told she couldn't wear her Docs to meeting or out in service. Another friend of mine was told he couldn't wear his Birkenstocks to meeting or out in service.
Prepare to have every last detail of your life scrutinized and be prepared to have your individuality stripped away if you actually plan on going through with baptism. I'm not joking or exaggerating. That's just how it is. Please, like Lovesdubs said, Research.
riz
NameWithheld

Tattogirl: BTW, what are the tattos?
Please do take JeffT's offer. Look over his material - it's all reprints from Watchtower publications. The problem is that it's so convoluted and conterdictory that current JW's are embarrased or ashamed of it. They will NOT want to talk about it, and if you insist on showing it to them they will more than likely leave (never to come back).
JW's have a LONG history of failed end of the world predictions and flip-flopping teachings and rules. When you show it to them they will try and explain it away with the old "we got NEW LIGHT on that matter and no longer beleive that way" as if that makes everything OK.
How does that explain for example that they taught that if a woman was raped and did NOT scream for help she was gulity of fornication, then changed their minds to say that she was NOT guilty, then changed again to say she WAS, then NOT, then WAS, then NOT. This went on for years. That's NEW LIGHT? Sounds more like a strobe light to me.
Same applies to their teaching on if the people of Sodom and Gommorah would be resurrected or not. That changed many times, YES, NO, YES, NO.
Those are just a couple of examples. There are more. 1975 was a big one, they allowed a big fevor to build in the people (even suggesting that people should sell homes, forfeit jobs, etc to go full time preaching) that 1975 was going to be armagedon, then when it didn't happen, blamed the people for "getting carried away!"
For details on these just search these forums, you will find LOTs of proof via quotes from the older JW publications that they did indeed teach these things. Even though the JWs now try and pretend that never happend.
This is NOT just another 'nice' religion. If you join, prepare to give your life away to pleasing the local elders and preaching (selling mags/books on your own dime). To leave the religion will be an emotionally devistating challenge. Just look at hom many here are still suffering sometimes MANY years after leaving.
Introspection

the lady I'm studying with has a daughter who is going to get a tattoo. She even pointed out a passage in the bible that says how god does not judge by outward appearances.

Tattoo, this isn't unheard of, I've know witnesses with tatoos, but it would be like a little heart on the ankle or something, hardly visible. Of course, there's a good chance they got those before they became a witness too.
Ask her whether obvious differences in appearance like pink hair wouldn't be a problem in the preaching work, whether it wouldn't detract from the serious message of the kingdom.
I guess she could be lying but she knows how I am and why would she want me to join if I wasn't allowed to be me, I would be disfellowshipped within minutes.
I don't know how long you've been studying, but chances are you've already covered information in the literature about changes a person needs to make in their life if they are to be acceptable to God. Obviously, then, not everyone can go on like it's business as usual after they decide to be baptized as a witness. It may be that they're thinking it's something you'll change AFTER you become a witness, but of course this would be misleading. Anyway, the definitive information about the religion is going to be found in the literature itself, so look at the publication you're studying from and the magazines. When you read it in print nobody can deny it.
SixofNine

she was honest and said she wouldn't talk to them since they wouldn't be good examples of Jehovah Witness.

And you feel that is acceptable? Treat someone as the walking dead simply because they either make a mistake, or can't overcome weaknesses, or they simply make different choices on interpretation of the Bible?
I don't know what planet you are from, but here on earth, in the year 2001, many of us have joined in a new religion, that eschews arrogant dictatorial theology n favor of kindness and love. We call it "humanity". I can't help but think with your tatoos and pink hair, you will feel far more accepted in our religion than the Witness religion. We may not "love bomb" you as much at first, but we will accept you, and we will be there for you when you need us. And you will need us.
rem

TattooGrl,
It is true that if you are disfellowshiped no Jehovah's Witness will talk to you. Some won't even look at you.
...and I understand why they don't talk to disfellowshipped members, If you were a part of a vegetarian club and you decided to eat meat, would you expect others to talk to you.
Think about what you just said here. Of course your vegetarian friends would still TALK to you! They would not shun you just because you chose to eat meat. You might not be part of the club anymore, but that has no bearing upon whether some of the vegetarians might still be your friend or if any of them can still talk to you.
It is different in the JW religion. When you are disfellowshiped, you are viewed as dead. Your best friends and family are not allowed to talk to you.
Also the pink hair, piercings, and tatoos are a big no no in the religion. You have to have a certain appearance to be respectable and keep from distracting from the message when you go from door to door. They will tell you anything before you get baptized, but after that, the truth will come out and you will be looked down upon. Some may even shun you even though you are not disfellowshiped!
rem
By the way, I was raised as a JW and finally got out after 23 years.
"Most people would rather die than think; in fact, they do so."
..........Bertrand Russell
LDH

Tatt,
Girl above all else you sound like an INDIVIDUAL. When you become a JW, just keep in mind, you will have to give that up.
Please take 15 minutes to look at this site; it's one of my faves.
http://www.jwfiles.com/
My favorite page is called "Become a JW and you can't.." I've pasted it here for you. It is the most precise piece of work on how being a JW will affect you socially that I've ever seen.
Good Luck to you. What you decide to do is up to you, but don't ever say you weren't warned.
BECOME A JW AND YOU CAN'T
Celebrate Mother's Day
Celebrate Father's Day
Celebrate Grandparent's Day
Celebrate Birthdays
Celebrate Thanksgiving
Celebrate New Year's Day
Celebrate Christmas
Celebrate Halloween
Celebrate Easter
Celebrate Flag Day
Celebrate Independence Day (Fourth of July)
Celebrate Hanukkah
Celebrate St. Patrick's Day
Celebrate Valentine's Day
Celebrate "Any" Holiday
Sing any Holiday Songs
Eat turkey on Thanksgiving
Join the Boy Scouts
Join the Girl Scouts
Become a Cheerleader
Attend class reunions (No "Worldly" association)
Go to the school prom
Play School Sports (No competition allowed)
Play Professional Sports
Join any organization that has ties to Christianity
Shop at the Salvation Army
Volunteer for the Salvation Army
Shop at Church run thrift stores
Shop at Church Garage Sales
Shop at any Store that has Christian ties
Contribute to the Red Cross
Join the YMCA
Join the Military
Attend Alcoholics Anonymous
Salute the Flag
Sing the National Anthem
Go to War
Own a Gun
Learn karate
Vote (Conscience matter now to please Governments, you will be ostracized if you do)
Run for any Public Office
Campaign for a Candidate
Can join union, but not participate in its affairs
Buy lottery tickets
Gamble
Date without supervision - young or old
Watch R rated movies
Cannot work on another Church if it's a regular customer
Smoke cigarettes, pipes or a cigars
Sell cigarettes, pipes or a cigars
Accept Blood
Donate Blood
Wear blue jeans or casual clothes to the Kingdom Hall
Wear pants to the Kingdom Hall if you are a female
Wear skirts or dresses that are above the knee at any time
Wear any type of long hair if you are a man
Wear a beard in some Kingdom Halls and areas (judged hard)
Pierce ears if male, other body parts if female
Have any Tattoos (no matter what the rule is now, ask the old-timers)
Say curse words
Toast drinks (pagan origin)
Throw rice at a wedding (pagan origin)
Say "Bless You" when someone sneezes
Say "Good Luck!", "Wish me Luck", "I was Lucky" or "You were Lucky"
Tell ghost stories
Practice Yoga
Own a Smurf
Watch TV shows, "Sabrina, the Teenage Witch", "Touched by an Angel", or "Bewitched"
Say "It was fate" or mention anything to do with "fate"
Engage in any risky acts such as: Sky Diving, Bungie Jumping & Hang Gliding
Have Jesus as your Mediator and Savior
Wear or own a Cross
Attend another Church (Spiritual Fornication)
Associate on a regular basis with nonbelievers
Associate with ex-members
Associate with disfellowshipped ones
Talk with disfellowshipped ones
Marry a nonbeliever (If you do, you are judged hard by the congregation)
Marry in another Church or attend a wedding in another Church
Have a funeral in another Church or attend a funeral in another Church
Pray, including holding your head down, when a nonbeliever prays
Study other religious articles not from the Society
Read negative information about the Society
Question the Watchtower Society on anything
Exercise your on conscience if it goes against the religion
Question Anything!
Have Christian freedom
If you are a woman you can't pray in the presence of men, without a covering on your head
Become a Jehovah's Witness and you shouldn't....
.... if you do you will be looked down upon
Discuss politics
Get on the Internet
Attend social functions organized by your place of work
Associate with worldly neighbors
Attend College (The Society has lightened up on this somewhat, but if you attend you are not putting Kingdom interests first, and will be judged.)
Become a Jehovah's Witness and you have to....
Attend several regular meetings each week
Go out in field service regularly to recruit new members
Report your field service activity to the congregation each month
Attend regular scheduled conventions
Give talks at the congregation (whether young or old, male or female)
Read and fully understand their teachings
Prepare for each meeting
Study with family
Fully accept the Watchtower's authority and rules (no exceptions)
Dress according to their rules at the Kingdom Halls, Service and conventions (no exceptions)
Women and small girls must wear dresses
Men must wear dress pants with dress shirts and ties

Associate only with fellow members
Report on fellow members including your family, if they are caught doing something against Society's rules
You have to sing at the meetings (even if you have a bad voice) - or you are looked down upon
NameWithheld

As far as this woman's daughter getting a tatto, I can almost gaurantee it's going to be in a place/size that's not noticable or can be hidden by most clothing, cause if it was visible in normal clothing the elders would be all over her in a heartbeat. Of course, it's not a 'disfellowshipping' offense (though I wouldn't be shocked to hear of someone being DF'ed for it either!) but if the elders take issue with it this woman's daughter will not get any 'privileges' in the cong. Of course, the poor girl may not WANT any of those 'privileges' :D She may (probably) just wants to live her life - but that option is not open to her while she lives with JW parents.
Francois

Yes, if I were a member of a vegetarian group and decided to eat meat, I would expect sane humans who continued in that group to continue to speak to me. I wouldn't expect them to share my diet, though. And that would be the end of it.
You merely haven't reached that stage in your introduction to the JWs where its time to trot out the emotional thumb-screws, the endless demands, and all the rest.
You don't have to take our word for it. Just keep on going in the direction you're going and you'll get there. Guaranteed. Then write us back.
Francois
Where it is a duty to worship the Sun you can be sure that a study of the laws of heat is a crime.
fodeja

If you were a part of a vegetarian club and you decided to eat meat, would you expect others to talk to you.

Would you shun your lifelong best friend for choosing an alternative way of nutrition?
Would you refuse to speak to your mother/father/best friend because one of them has chosen to change their religion?
Would you simply accept it if your best friend, or your relatives, shun from the very moment you become a JW? Simply for that reason alone?
Think about it. From your postings so far it seems to me you are attracted to the JWs mostly for social reasons: nice people, close community and that.
Judging from my personal experience, that's the reason why most people join. Doctrine is less important - but remember that you _must_ accept that doctrine from A to Z (and if you don't, you should at least be silent about such issues).
And still, many people leave and feel good about it. They come from the most diverse backgrounds, they live in different parts of the world, they have a very wide range of personalities and living habits. Some of them have been in more tolerant congregations, others in more orthodox ones. They leave for different reasons, but their stories _still_ have a lot in common.
Ask yourself, why? Please take your time - you may also want to take a break from JWs and ex-JWs alike, for a while. Just let the case rest for a while. There is no need to hurry, or is there?
f.
edited for clarity

Studying

Share this