Marriage question

by starfish422 41 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Rabbit
    Rabbit

    is2cool

    So, how exactly are people supposed to have sex if they're not supposed to 'touch' each others genitals?

    I was thinking REAL hard about that during my future mother-in-laws "birds & bees" talk!

  • stillajwexelder
    stillajwexelder

    or who became JWs after being married. Did the elder marrying you, or those studying with you, counsel you as to what forms of sexual intercourse are acceptable within Jehovah's Loving Organization(tm)?

    Sort of - kinda - the brother studying with us - who was an elder came to the discussion about sex in the Paradise Earth book I think and asked - so you are both aware of what is acceptable to Jehovah arent you. We both said yes and that was that - so it was alluded to but he never said directly - No Oral - No anal -- but then at the time the March 15th 1983 had literally JUST been published -so it was kinda fresh in the mind so to speak

  • JH
    JH

    I never got married, but I have the impression that JW's who obey don't have much of a sex life...Do they?

  • Euphemism
    Euphemism

    Seeking Knowledge asked:

    Something about they weren't married in a KH, they were sitting up on a platform during the ceremony & how "strange" the ceremony itself was. What's the marriage talk?? does that happen during the ceremony? Enquiring minds......

    The typical JW marriage ceremony will start with the traditional walk down the aisle, but instead of standing in front of the minister like in most churches, the couple will usually sit on the KH platform (rather than a pulpit, KHs usually have a 2-3' foot raised platform with a podium, chairs and a table), often along with the rest of the wedding party.

    The marriage talk is a 10-15 minute sermon expounding the JW doctrine on marriage and family life; it's based on a standardized outline provided by the Watchtower Society, which is why most JW wedding talks sound very similar. Some elders will also include anecdotes about how the couple met or personal material of that sort.

    Then they have the vows (also written by the WTS, no personalization allowed), exchanging of rings, the kiss, and a prayer (usually offered by a relative of the bride or groom).

    And that's the JW wedding ceremony. I've been at some ceremonies where a "Kingdom song" was sung, but that's fairly rare in my experience.

  • avishai
    avishai
    Don't tell me I'm going to have to eat my words

    Well, other than food, that's all you can eat as a JW. It really sux I mean it blows It's just plain lame that they interfere in this stuff.

  • wednesday
    wednesday

    A" good jw" that attends the meetings would already know that oral and anal sex are "out". They used to talk about it a lot in the mags/books. I don't recall being counseled about anything prior to marriage, but all the JWS books talk opeinly about the marriage due and what is ok and what is not. The "don't tell, don't ask" rule is is effect. The elders used to really get involved in a couples marriage (the 70's) but now don't unless one partner complains. It does get discussed a lot at bible studies b/c of the personal nature of studies and all that. JWS try to get people "straightened out" before they get baptized. I knew an elder who in teaching his daughters about sex made sure they knew what was appropriate to go inthe mouth and what was not. (LOL)

  • BrendaCloutier
    BrendaCloutier

    Being raised, then married JW my elder father performing the ceremony, I got the sex talk from my mom - something to the effect of do I know what my responsibilities are as a wife? and my response was something like being available for sex anytime my husband requests, keeping a good house, and doing nothing that would make others look unfavorable on him. She was satisfied. The WT made sure we knew that oral and anal sex was forbidden , as was sex during mensus. I was grateful for the later rule because it gave me a break! However, I never knew what quality sex was until I got divorced.

    -Brenda

  • phil78
    phil78

    We had no sex talk given to us before we were married. But mabey 2 years ago a "Special Day" assembly had a talk about something menial, but included in it was the sentence "We must ensure that the marriage bed is not defiled by practices normaly carried out by homosexuals".

    Those words brought me out of my slumber, hoping for something else as juicy. But that was it.

    Our drive home that night debated that subject. Did they mean Male homosexuals, of female, or both? I though they meant just male, but the in-laws weren't keen to debate the subject

  • redhotchilipepper
    redhotchilipepper

    No, thank God! I know or at least get the jist and have heard that JW's can't have any fun in bed. No oral sex, nothing. I'm glad my hubby and I never got that damn talk. It would have gone in one ear and out the other anyway! LOL

  • redhotchilipepper
    redhotchilipepper

    They did do the questions before the wedding about sex etc. Come on now! What couple doesn't do the rubbing thing, making out, and other stuff in the ORG. I know lots that have. Then they give these couples the pre-marital quiz and we all lie our faces off. It's pathetic. It's a problem/system that they themselves have created. I would like to know if there actually are any JW couples that haven't made out before marriage. I mean come on now, let's be honest here!

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